Page 80 of Taming Achilles

He kept on pacing, chanting that word. Why? Why? Why?

I swallowed. Even that hurt my torso, my ribs.

But those words, his voice, the pain of it … the “Why? Why? Why?” was like a high pitched squeal in my ear, slowly building, louder and louder like the squeak of feedback from a speaker that no one was turning off.

“Because he was going to kill you!” The words burst from my mouth, fast and angry. And it hurt to say it. My breaths were constricted by the bandage around my ribs. The bruising was all over my weak body. But it was too late to take it back. Too late to keep it secret. He knew enough, and the damning secrets would do no good now.

“He told me to leave you, but I didn’t.” It was easier to say now. “It’s why we had to stay in secret because my cover needed me to rise. You know how obsessed my father was.”

He stopped his pacing and stared at me. He took one step towards me. One step closer.

“We were in Venice, and everything was perfect.” With great effort, I touched the ring on my finger. “But then I got an envelope. It had pictures of you, through a scope. Victor–”

“Your father.” He interjected, but I ignored him.

“Victor,” I corrected him. “He threatened to have you killed if I did not end things. Those photos were my last warning.” My hands started shaking, just as they had half a decade ago when those photos of Geordie in the jewellery store, the target on his handsome face, were in my hands. “He said I was unfocused. And that he’d do me the favour of eliminating my distractions.” I took a breath. “That was the day I had stopped calling him my father. He might have disowned me after Cal broke our engagement, trying to spur me to work harder for his good favour by taking me from his will. But the truth was that he had stopped being my father at that moment. In Venice.”

Geo took one step closer to me. He was at the foot of the bed, and I wanted to reach out to him.

“So I packed my bags and left.” I bit my lower lip. “I went to Callum because he was an easy mark, and I had to show him I was committed to my work. So he wouldn’t come after you. It was the only way. Because I can’t live in this world if you’re not in it.”

A tear ran down my cheek.

“And the white van?” He took another step closer. His eyes intent on my face. I couldn’t look at him.

“I’m sure you understand I am a liability to the Sideshow now.” I swallowed. “And that means I am no longer of use to my masters.”

He took one more step, and he was almost within arm’s reach.

“You were sending me away to go in the van.” It was a statement. Not a question. But I answered anyway.

“Victor thinks that you have been the downfall of one of his assets.” I pressed on the ring. The jagged edges pierced into my skin, the pain grounding me in the moment. “He wouldn’t hesitate to take you. I needed to be sure they took me alone.”

One more step closer, and another question. “You knew your armour was compromised. Why didn’t you let me protect you?”

I gasped a pained breath. Tears. More tears went down my face.

“Because I love you, you Scottish idiot.” I finally looked at him. Tears were freely flowing down my face and I could hear the rapid beating of my heart in those monitors that were all too fucking loud. “I don’t want to live if you’re …” I couldn’t say it. The words were too terrible to even consider. “You deserve so much more than this.”

I wanted to curl into myself, but I couldn’t. The fucking bandages. My ribs. My weak body, the IV and wires poking from my arms.

“I’ll die a thousand times if it means you’re okay …” I let out an ugly snort as I tried to keep the tears, the snot, and everything else from spilling out.

My vision blurred, and I tried to wipe my face clear, but more tears, more snot and everything else came out. I must look a fright. My heart was breaking.

“What makes you think I’d be okay, if you’re not with me?” The bed dipped as he sat down beside me, his hip against mine. I felt his hands on my cheeks and his thumbs wiped at my tears which made me cry more. I looked up at the ceiling because his face would break me.

“I don’t know,” I wept before unleashing my bruised ego to jab where I knew it would hurt. “The dozen or so women that you’ve had since we’ve been apart?” My heart cracked. I swear, I heard myself snapping in two. “All the Lindseys and Athanyas and Simonas who are at your beck and fucking call. All of the ones who have had you while I was dying inside … I … I …”

I couldn’t say anymore. There was nothing left to say.

“Pip …” I felt him leaning towards me. But I leaned away.

“Get out,” I whispered.

“No.”

“Get out!” I yelled. “I don’t want you here!”

---