Page 74 of Loving Smoke

“All I could think about was getting out of his office and warning you, but he locked me in with his guards who took away my phone. The panic, the worry overwhelmed me, but I knew I had to fight back.” My voice caught, but I swallowed hard against the lump in my throat. “And I did.”

“Not necessary, babe. I know all this already.”

“When I entered the foyer and saw you at gunpoint I realized . . .”

Smoke cocked his head.

“I realized how much I cared about you and what it would mean if anything happened to you.”

“Believe me, I get it.”

“But you’re not ready or willing to express it or tell me how it all made you feel?”

“I just . . . I never learned how to talk about shit as a kid. I did learn opening my mouth at the wrong time or saying the wrong thing earned me a punch in the face. Probably one of the main reasons I’m such a good cage fighter. Getting hit and batted around didn’t mean anything to me, but I’m shit poor at talking about my feelings.”

“But you definitely have feelings. I saw your eyes when my father held his gun to my head. I even saw through the tough guy acting like you hated me. So why don’t you just get it out so we can move forward.”

Smoke pushed away from the counter and paced in front of me in the small storeroom. “You want me to get it out.” He grabbed a fifth of tequila and pitched it against the opposite wall. The bottle exploded sending shards of glass to the concrete floor. “How’s that? Is that good enough for you? Is that what you wanna see?”

“I want to see anything that makes you feel better. Remember I’m the daughter of one of the most feared members of the cartel. I don’t scare easily—but I think you know that already.”

“My heart almost stopped seeing that bastard holding you hostage. I could’ve easily dropped him, but I didn’t want you to have that image in your head, cause no matter what, Rico was still your father.”

He stopped pacing and faced me. “Then Manny came in and the fucked up situation got worse. All I could think about was getting you outta there and to safety. You bleeding out on the floor of the van gutted me.” He scrubbed his hands over his face. “I had my damn hand slammed in a metal cargo door and I didn’t even feel it cause I was so worried about you.”

He braced his palms on either side of the counter, our faces only inches apart. “Cause if anything happened to you I wouldn’t be able to function.”

I opened my arms and he leaned into my embrace. He held me tight and we stayed like that for a few long minutes, then I pulled back slightly.

“Thank you.” I smiled up at him. “For finally admitting you’re human.”

“How dare you call me human.” He pulled a goofy face, but I saw right through him.

I cupped his stubbled jaw. “I know how hard that was for you, and I appreciate you opening up to me. I also know you have to put on a front and act like a leader, but you never have to put on a facade for me. With me you can always be, just you.”

His eyes narrowed. “You sure about that?”

“Always.”

“How on fuckin’ earth did I get so damn lucky?” Smoke braced his arm around my waist and hoisted me off the counter. “Give me the keys.”

I dug them out of my pocket and handed them to him. He grabbed up my hand and we headed out of the storeroom and into the main room of the club.

“Hey, Ricky.” Smoke tossed him the keys and he caught them in mid-air. “You’re the beverage manager for the night.”

“Right, boss.”

“Let’s go.” He led me down the back hallway then angled us toward the stairs.

“What are you doing?” I protested halfway up the stairs. “They need more tequila, and I have to make sure they have enough limes, fill the ice bins, and put out the mixers for the specialty drinks.” I stopped at the top of the landing. “I just can’t leave on a busy night like tonight.”

“Sure you can, cause you’re with the boss.” He nudged me down the upstairs hallway.

“Boss?” I cocked my head. “Really?”

“Yeah, with the guys I’m the boss. With you, hell no—except tonight. Tonight you’re gonna do everything I say, and believe me you won’t be disappointed.”

A shiver shimmied up my spine as Smoke unlocked the apartment door, bundled me inside, then kicked it closed with his booted foot. A minute later, he hoisted me up, stumbled us into the bedroom, and crashed us to the bed. His eyes narrowed, his lips parted and when he leaned over me I heard a growl in the back of his throat.

---