Page 54 of Loving Smoke

“I really wanna hate you,” he rasped into my ear.

His needy rasp conflicted with his words.

His grip tightened around my waist and my faithless body snuggled into him.

A few more minutes of agonizing silence as the hammering beat of his heart pulsed against my back. I told myself this was nothing more than hate sex, yet when he filled me up all reason and rationale disappeared. He showed his vulnerability, making me want to explain my deception even if it meant opening a box I couldn’t close again.

“The reason I ran out of here the other night was because you mentioned my mother.”

He shifted behind me until we were face to face.

“You complimented my cooking and asked if my mother taught me how to cook.” I drew in a deep breath. “Any mention of her brings on . . . anxiety.”

He cradled my head into his shoulder, his soft caress in total contrast to his earlier brutality. How could one person throw off so many different vibes?

“Is that what this is all about?” he whispered into her hair. “The reason Rico sent you here.”

“I wanted no part of my father’s dealings until my mother was murdered.”

“I know he thinks it was my club, but it wasn’t.”

“Maybe it wasn’t your exact club, but it was definitely some part of the Royal Bastards.”

“Nah, you’re wrong, maybe another MC, but not the Bastards.”

“Four of them stormed our villa and shot my mother in cold blood.” My voice quivered but I fought for control. “I was there—I saw it.”

“I believe what you saw was guys wearing Royal Bastard’s cuts, but it wasn’t my club or any of the other chapters.”

“But even the surveillance cameras show four men wearing the same cuts as you.” I pushed to a sitting position. “Yet, you’re telling me I’m wrong.”

“I’m telling you it wasn’t us. Did you ever consider it could’ve been enemies of your father’s dressed like bikers?”

All the different scenarios I played over and over in my head the last year, I never considered that possibility.

“But why would whoever put the blame on your club? Most of the people my father deals with have no problem owning their crimes, sometimes even bragging about them.”

“Over the last year, the Bastards and your father’s crew have mixed it up a few times. Mostly petty shit, shortage on shipments, pricing problems, so maybe someone within his organization was behind this, and wanted to tag the Bastards to start an all-out war. Take the Bastards out of the picture once and for all.”

“It was no random act, the shooters knew we were by the pool. They were in and out before anyone knew what happened. It was very organized and well-planned.”

“And you’re sure your mother was the target?”

“It’s hard to say, it all happened so fast. She was the first to react in an effort to shield Manny and I, and then . . .” My throat tightened making it impossible to continue. I blinked a few times then squeezed my eyes shut as the horrific scene played out in my mind. I could still hear her gut-wrenching screams, and then the blood, followed by dead silence.

A stabbing pain seized my middle and I wrapped my arms around my waist folding into myself.

Smoke sat up, then eased me against his side. “I get your need for revenge, babe but I swear on my club colors, it wasn’t the Bastards who did this.”

I savored the warmth of Smoke’s body, but my mind was too muddled and confused. I couldn’t think straight when I was with this man. One part of me wanted to scream and yell and pummel his chest while calling him a liar, while the other side wanted to burrow into this safe space and never leave.

“I have to go.” I pushed away from him, and he released me. I inched to the side of the bed and stood. “I don’t know what just happened between us, but I have to have some time to think all this out. I tried to tell my father I wanted to stop this charade the other day when I felt myself getting too close to you but he . . .”

“Did he threaten you?” Smoke reached out to me. “Did he hurt you?”

“No, not me, but someone close to me and I can’t put that person or her family in danger.”

“Let me help you.”

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