Page 10 of Fighting for You

Chapter 11

Ryder

It had been two days since Meghan replied to any of my emails. It was fucking with my mind. Even sitting in my meeting today, listening to our roles and responsibilities at the Port of Sunnyvale, I couldn’t help but keep checking the email on my phone.

I had already received and replied to two emails from Melanie, the owner of MLA Publishing. Meghan’s name was attached to the emails, but yet, she never replied.

I wasn’t ready to let her go. She wasn’t even mine, yet, I craved to hear from her.

“Hey, what’s going on with you?” Matt asked, as he leaned over and whispered so no one else would hear.

I quickly put my phone back in my pocket and glanced at Matt. “Nothing, just checking my emails,” I replied.

“Bullshit,” he said, shaking his head.

I don’t know what has overcome me, but I couldn’t let my head get this twisted right now. We had been briefed earlier this morning and it had been declared that there was definitely a rat working at the Port of Sunnyvale. Someone was giving clearance and looking the other way to shipments containing illegal products. Apparently, there was a huge criminal organization that was bringing in stolen artifacts that equaled in the millions, that also housed drugs that would be transported all over the United States from Mexico.

Now that I was finally listening again, I felt my jaw clench as I heard about the deceit that was taking place right here in our city. I hated a rat and a traitor on the inside wasn’t something that Salvatore Security Forces wasn’t accustomed to. Not long ago, someone within Lance’s own group had placed his men in danger. We couldn’t let this go. We had a job to do and damn it, we would take care of those that were enemies to their own.

By noon, our meeting had wrapped up and I was given my task for tomorrow. In the morning, I would make my way to the Port of Sunnyvale and work undercover as a security guard.

As I made my way back to my desk, I found myself more than eager to check my email. I was beyond frustrated that Meghan hadn’t replied back to me. So, even though I probably sounded desperate, I did something I knew I shouldn’t, I sent her an email.

Meghan,

I hope you don’t consider me a stalker...yet. I have to admit, I looked forward to our daily email exchanges. I hope you are doing well. How do you feel about the beach?

Lost and confused,

-Ryder

I hit send and then sat back, rubbing my jaw as I re-read the email a hundred times. Each time I read, I detested the words. I sounded more like some crazed loser than a man hopelessly wanting to get to know a beautiful woman. If I hadn’t scared her away before, I definitely did now.

Shutting down my computer, I realized I couldn’t sit around and wallow in my own misery any longer. I was a man of action. If I wanted Meghan, then I would just have to go get her myself. I was on a mission now.

Chapter 12

Meghan

As a little girl, all I ever dreamed about was finding my prince charming and riding off in the sunset after our fairytale wedding. However, my fairytale became more of a ghoulish nightmare. Now, I was left alone without my prince, and the thought of finding love again terrified me to my very core. Being loved and admired was something I had taken for granted with Wade. At the time, he cherished me and treated me like I was a priceless gift. Now, without him, I found myself craving his affection and desiring to just hear his voice one last time.

What would Wade think of my current predicament? Would he be ashamed of me for shamelessly flirting and leading a man on? Or, would he be happy that I was moving on-- which I totally wasn’t. I sit back in my comfy chair and close my eyes. At times, when I try really hard, I can still see his smile and hear his voice when he would say my name. A shudder raced down my spine and I instantly jump, scaring myself.

Was that a sign that what I am doing is wrong? Shit, I have no idea what I'm doing anymore. I had believed that love would never fail, but love had failed me and Wade. It was gone and honestly, I don’t think I will ever find something like that again. I know I should pull away from my computer right now. I should just ignore the email, and forget I ever read his words. But, I can’t.

I hate this dangerous game I am playing with myself. I know what Kirsten and Stacey would say; go for it! You are young and single, Wade would want this for you. Regardless if they are right or wrong, my own heart can’t take the pain of trying to replace Wade. Everyone else now was a stranger, they just don’t matter as he did.

Chewing on my fingernails, I couldn’t get over the email Ryder had just sent. My mind and heart were battling and it was causing my head to ache like I was being hit with a hammer repeatedly.

Shoving away from my desk, I couldn’t take it anymore. I needed to get out of the office for a while. Checking the time, I realized it was past my lunch break. I needed to run away for just a few minutes. Get lost in the electricity of the busy downtown streets.

Ten minutes later, I was escaping the confines of the office building and stepping out onto the loud and busy sidewalk. Palm trees lined the walkway and the sun shined brightly in the sky. Sighing, I had never been so happy to hear cars honking and people yelling. I needed to drown out my own voice right now.

My stomach growled, telling me I needed to hurry and find something to eat. There was a taco truck that would sometimes park on this street and they had the best fajita tacos. I began to head in that direction when a sight stopped me dead in my tracks.

Standing on the corner, staring straight at me was Ryder. He had a delicious grin plastered on his chiseled face. His muscular arms crossed his massive chest like he was annoyed that he had been waiting for so long. Was he waiting for me, or was this a strange coincidence? Something told me this wasn’t by happenstance.

I walked along the sidewalk, trying to figure out what I would say. Our eyes had already locked, so I couldn’t pretend like I hadn’t seen him. In fact, this was the first time since the gala that I was seeing him in person. His face had haunted me every day since if I were being honest with myself.

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