“No way. Why?”

“She thinks he’s cheating and wants me to be the one to help her catch him in the act.”

I choke back a laugh. “What if he’s sneaking in while you’re here on the couch and not by the window?”

“Then oh well! I can’t sit at the window all night! I have other things to do, like finding out how you got Mr. Bossy Pants to drive you home.” Her eyes gleam with anticipation.

I take another mouthful of popcorn. “He saved me from a disastrous date and then we went back to his place.”

Her eyes almost pop out of their sockets.

“Wait, that didn’t come out right.”

“You went on a date…with him? I’m so confused.” She coughs from almost choking on her popcorn.

“No. Well, yes, but not with Daniel. With a psycho catfisher from the dating app you set up for me.”

“How did that happen? And why am I just now finding out about this?”

“Well, he asked me to go to lunch and I liked what he looked like in his pictures.”

“Let me see,” she says, reaching for my phone.

I sink into the couch, devouring more popcorn. “I already deleted it.”

“Jeez. Was it that bad?”

“Yep, like mixing vinegar with soda.”

“Ugh. So sorry.”

“He grabbed me at the cafe and demanded I return a hundred bucks. Turns out, his son told him I charged for hook ups.”

His smell returns to my nose, and I gag. Amber gets up to grab us some drinks.

“A kernel get you?” She asks as I put my hands over my mouth and nose.

“No. I was just remembering what he smelled like.”

“Oh, man.”

“Like old cheese, sewage, sweaty feet, you get the idea. Not to mention how he ferociously devoured all the food and spit while he talked.”

“Just horrible.” She dips her hand in the popcorn bowl.

“Right? Then to top it all off, the creep started chasing me down the street after I told him no a million times.”

“No way!”

“Yep.”

“What happened? Are you okay?”

I nod. “Believe it or not, the grump just so happened to pull up at the right time. I hate to admit it, but I think I kinda needed him. He heard the commotion on his phone—I guess I purse-dialed him.”

She grins. “Hmm. Sounds like he isn’t so icy after all.”

Yeah, right.