Page 76 of I Love a Good Challenge

“Didn’t you? Strange.” The tone of her voice is a clear sign that nothing about this conversation tonight wasn’t premeditated. And I’m more impressed with her by the minute. No wonder Lily says that Gladys is her hero.

“Why would you do that?” My fingers grip the table, willing the answer to be a good one, even though I know that’s not how it works.

“I admit to nothing, dear. But someone had to drive your girl to admit what she’s always known. You’re good for her. And nobody gets to mess with you . . . well, besides her.”

Suddenly, Lily appears beside me, a to-go drink in her hand. My guess is that it’s a chai latte. Gladys winks as she hurries away.

Once, Lily told me that she feels as if people keep trying to get her to tame her personality down or rein it in. But maybe Birch Borough is exactly what she needs to maintain that feisty spirit, especially if Gladys’ support is any indication. I don’t want to quench her fire. I just want her to let me be warmed by it.

She lifts the cup to her rosy lips, and I lick my own before catching myself. Our eyes meet, and I feel the weight of our connection as it punches me in the gut. I’m punched every time I’m in her presence. MMA fighters have nothing on what it feels like for someone to hold your heart in their hands, even though you don’t remember giving them permission. Maybe she’s a con artist.

I have a burning interest in those lips of hers. Right now, they may be pressed against a compostable lid, but there have been moments they have brushed against my own.

“What?” she asks.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Lily.” I look at the floor, not wanting to see her intense gaze focused on me for a minute. I need to think straight. “You were right.”

“Say it again?” She crosses her arms with a smirk, her cup lightly hovering beside her elbow.

I shake my head and push down a grin of my own. “I was scared. I didn’t know if you still wanted me here or if you would change your mind.”

“I understand. We’re messy. Complicated. Challenging.” She shrugs, but there’s some heart behind it.

I wince because she isn’t wrong.

“And yet, still I dream of you,” she says.

I take in the strong set of her jaw, the lavender flecks in her eyes being overtaken by the grey, the light illuminating part of her face as she stares forward. She doesn’t dare look at me after uttering those words, but I hungrily take all of her in.

How can a woman be so feisty yet so adorable? She is wearing a cropped sweater and wide-leg jeans, all in black. She paired the look with white sneakers. The effect is utterly charming and all Lily.

“Is that honest enough for you?” Her bottom lip quivers, and my chest tightens.

If I assumed she was about to run, I was wrong. Maybe I was wrong about a lot of things. Because we can have the facts, the ones we create stories from, but we forget that other stories are present too. Facts don’t always hold all the truth. I should know this better than anyone, yet I’ve been so caught up in my emotions and trying to make sense of it all that I forgot to remember the truth.

Lily left. Fact. Lily never contacted me again. Fact. I moved to Birch Borough. Fact. I accepted a series of challenges from Lily. Fact. I could move again and find a new address. Fact. We both don’t know how to live without the other. Truth.

“I just don’t think it’s enough,” Lily says.

And that’s enough for my heart to sink. After all this time, we’re back to her being so sure and then uncertain just the same. I turn away, convinced that if I keep looking at her, I’ll do something stupid like digging for more of the truth and tearing us apart in the process.

Excavating heartache is a risky business. And I’m just not in the mood to push further tonight. But I know that her words confirm what she feels for me. They are now filed in the recesses of my mind. Soon, they’ll come to the surface again, either in a dream or the next time I eat chocolate cake.

“Well, then,” I grind the words out, “there’s nothing I can do to convince you. And I need to think.”

If I walk down this road with her again, I’m never getting off it. I want to walk it with her more than anything, but my fight-or-flight response is screaming at me with the need to clear my head. My heart is all over the place tonight.

Lily swallows and nods, her skin turning a paler color than before. “No. Gosh, I just keep messing this up, don’t I? Don’t you have a manual or something? I can’t seem to tell you . . . to make you feel . . .” Her voice trails off.

The sinking feeling in my stomach urges me not to keep waiting. I need Lily to be sure.

I couldn’t have guessed that this was the place where Lily and I would end up. If you told me this was how our story was written, I would’ve bet my whole savings account that it could never be, that we wouldn’t have gotten a second chance, or that we would’ve ended up eloping, surrounded by flowers and a preacher who doesn’t understand why we can’t even wait one more second to call each other mine.

But here we are. Sometimes, the truth truly does get swallowed in facts. Maybe my next challenge needs to be finding out more of the truth.

“Hey, are you good?” Rafe asks, coming up behind me and placing his arm on my shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” I begin, trying to avoid eye contact with Lily before more emotion surfaces. “I’m happy for you, but I also feel like I’m losing . . .”

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