Page 132 of Tempest

Ardyn

I hauntthe halls of Camden House for two full days.

Or, maybe haunt is the wrong word, since even ghosts have reasons to stay behind and turn away from the light. Their hearts are broken, and I’m no longer certain that I have even that.

I didn’t think it was possible to be worse than broken, so shattered as to be irreparable, yet here I am, still functioning at a basic level but not nearly enough to still be considered human.

A hollow ache replaces my heartbeats, burning fire substitutes for my tears, and a nonstop, thunderous rumble scars the void that once housed my mind.

I’m aware of the one person who could stun me out of purgatory, but I’m terrified to run into him. Tempest would awaken sections of my soul, but not the right ones. Not the good, moral ones that understand right from wrong and always chooses mercy. No, he would summon the poison in my blood, turn it as black as his. I’m horrified that I might accept it.

That is how deep my love for him runs—obsessive, unhinged, unhealthy. I cannot love a killer, yet I do. I’m heartbroken, fearful, empty, and desperate for him.

I’m better off staying in bed.

“Hey. Sleep monster.”

Clover jostles my shoulder through the layers of bedcovers.

“Time to get up. You’ve taken pathetic to a whole new level.”

I mumble, “You don’t understand.”

“Because you won’t tell me.”

I can never tell you. If one thing has been constant in my mind, it’s that. Clover can never know what her brother did. I can’t put her through what I’m being forced to endure.

“I’m sorry for what happened between us.” Clover’s voice comes out quiet. “Maybe you were joking about Professor Morgan, and I took it too seriously. You were looking out for me, and I’m told I can be overly sensitive…”

I stiffen underneath her hand, clamping my lips shut.

“I never want a guy to come between us, Ardyn. And I never want you to think you can’t talk to me. The way you’ve been acting these past few days … If you need to talk to someone, I’m here.”

“I can’t talk about it with anyone.” My voice comes out as a pained whisper.

Clover sighs heavily. “It’s my brother, isn’t it?”

I freeze, then unfreeze enough to draw the covers down from my head and peer at her.

She gives me a sidelong look. “You and I, girl, we don’t talk to many people, but I watch enough k-dramas to recognize what not showering and sobbing into your pillow every night means. You’ve got a broken heart, and since Tempest is the only other person of the opposite sex I’ve seen you talk to…”

“You’re not mad?” I croak.

Clover’s eyes widen. She leaps from the bed, splaying her hands out and shouting, “What the fuck? I was right?!”

I shoot upright. “You just said you knew!”

“I didn’t think you’d agree with me! I thought it would disgust you enough to shake you out of this funk and tell me what’s really going on with you!”

“Oh.” I shut my eyes with a pained grimace. “Well…” If only you knew the rest.

“Did you sleep with him?” Clover’s question is cold.

My heart, what little there is left of it, plummets. But I can’t lie to her. “Yes.”

Silence.

Then: “Why didn’t you tell me? I thought you were my friend. How long has this been going on? You’ve been sneaking around behind my back? When were you—” Clover spins with the speed of her questioning. “Were you never going to say anything? What if I hadn’t guessed right now. Would you have just laughed at my expense forever?”