Page 125 of Daring You

“Just hear me out. He’s a former teammate, in college. Was kicked off for a positive drug test, and went downhill from there. Crack, cocaine, heroine, he was like a gradient going from bad drugs to worse.”

I nod. “Yes, I remember him. I especially remember when he burst into my dorm room the morning you were sneaking out of my bed.”

Ben rubs his lips together. “A guy that beat-up on drugs, that addicted, tends to lurk in dark corners. Literally. I had a meet set-up with Aiden—the U.S. Marshal you met—one night. It was at a diner, way offroad from the campus, in a neighborhood rarely frequented by college kids, if you get my meaning.”

“So you met in a poorer suburb.”

“Yes. It never occurred to me that Dodge would be there, too. But he’s short on cash, desperate, down on his luck. Of course he’d be prowling the outskirts. And he saw me through the window, in one of the booths, talking to Aiden.”

“He knew who Aiden was?”

“No. He knew who I was, and that made me and my guest an ample target. Better to stick with what you know is harmless and safe than try to mug a stranger with a gun. There was a moment Aiden went to the bathroom and I got up to pay—it wasn’t a place where the waitresses fetched you a bill. I guess Aiden’s wallet slipped out onto the booth when he stood. Dodge went over, found the wallet, scraped it for cash, and saw the shield.”

My lips part. “Oh.”

“Yeah. He figured I was talking to a cop, but didn’t know for what. But I’m sure you’ve figured out, it didn’t matter for what. The fact he saw me with a cop was enough to compromise me. If he blabbered it to Locke, to anyone, and it got around I’m associated with law enforcement…it would bring up questions I couldn’t answer.”

“But, couldn’t you have made up some story? He’s a family friend, or something?”

Ben smiles sadly at me, like he thinks it’s cute I’m trying to solve something that toppled dominos long ago.

“Aiden saw him before I did,” Ben says. “Launched himself at Dodge and tackled him. Got back his shield. But Dodge had been creeping up to us for a while. Heard enough of a conversation to get him suspicious. The gist of which would prove Aiden wasn’t a family friend.”

“You were exposed,” I surmise.

“Enough to cause great concern. Especially when Dodge felt opportunistic about the whole thing. He knew he’d been listening in on something he wasn’t supposed to. Did he know I was in WITSEC? No, probably not. But I’d been careful ever since discovering my history at sixteen. I didn’t want anything hurting my parents.”

“So…Dodge blackmailed you? Said you had to what? Fuck me or he’d tell? That doesn’t make sense.”

“Dodge wanted back on the team. To be part of something again. Have friends. Me, Locke, East, Ash, we were the closest he had, before he fucked it all up. And he was pissed at me for not going to bat for him when he tested positive for weed. Those were the good ol’ days, before he got into the meth.”

“So…blackmail and revenge?”

Ben shakes his head. “Dodge died soon after. You didn’t hear about it?”

I shake my head. I was too deep in my own mortification to hear about Dodge’s demise.

“An overdose. His last words, according to the other druggie he was with, were, I ain’t got friends. I got enemies of my own making.”

“That’s terrible,” I say, and I mean it. “But what does this have to do—”

“I can’t give you answers on Dodge’s motivations. I’m telling you thisto explain why Dodge came into your room that morning, laughing. Talking about a dare.”

“Because you did as he asked. You did it to protect your identity until you and Aiden could figure out how to appease Dodge.”

“No. What happened with you and I was real. It was just very, very bad timing. I wasn’t thinking, when you answered that door, Astor. You looked…fuck, you were so sexy and innocent at the same time. I nearly exploded in my pants.”

I try not to feel warm at the compliment, such that it is. “You couldn’t have let me in on Dodge’s sick dare?”

“How? Without compromising what happened with him and Aiden? I stopped thinking, Astor, and that’s my fault. I saw you and my brain shut off. You were all-consuming, and it was the best night I’d had in a very long time. Because for once, I didn’t feel weight on my shoulders. All I could feel was you.”

“Ben.”

“I didn’t know Dodge followed me, especially after I knocked him out. Had no idea he’d burst through your door, blabbering about a fake dare. And Jesus, I did not know your RA would come in soon after and take a pic of it.”

“I can believe this. I can, because of what’s happened recently, and the very real threat to your life. But I can’t reconcile what you did after, when you just…left me.”

“I was leaving that morning for good,” Ben says quietly. “I was making plans with Aiden to leave.”

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