Page 41 of Anchor Point

Mac and I clung to each other, and across from us, the parents mirrored us as the crew placed the child in the ambulance.

“Mom?” Rosie’s voice cut through the chaos of the scene, high and tight and more than a little scared. I pulled away from Mac and scanned the area to find her huddling on a bench. “Is he going to be okay?” she asked as I wrapped my arms around her, fully aware that at any point, I could’ve been, could be, that mother.

“I don’t know, honey. But we did the best we could.” I tried to reassure her, even if I was having trouble processing it myself.

“Is it always like this? This terrible?” Her voice shook with uncertainty.

“Sometimes.” Mac’s voice was more gruff than normal, as affected by the scene as the rest of us. “I’ve never had an emergency while on vacation, but sometimes things happen. It’s not… expected when on duty, but it’s almost as if you’re more prepared. Dealing with an emergency is almost second nature. You just do it. When it happens off duty, the instinct to act is still the same.”

Mac stood behind Rosie on the other side, his large hand landing on her shoulder. The contact seemed to free her, and she bolted around the bench and into his arms, where she burst into tears.

“You have the worst job in the entire world.”

Mac wrapped my baby girl in a bear hug like she’d been the one who might have been lost. The vision of them grew blurry as I fought back tears. That whole scene could’ve been so much worse. He raised his head from her hair and held an arm out to me. I stepped into the awkward embrace, sandwiching Rosie between us.

Finally, Mac said, “I’ll tell you like I tell my crew. We aren’t responsible for the calls, for the emergencies. We are a small part of the solution, and we do our very best, every time. Sometimes things work out for the best. Sometimes they don’t. But we know we’ve done everything we could to help. And that’s what brings me peace.”

In that moment, I didn’t know what was sweeter. Holding my baby girl, us both being held by this man, or his simple philosophy. The only thing I knew for certain was that I didn’t want the day to end.

Chapter Twelve

Mac

“You have a beautiful family,” a generic voice said, breaking through the tender moment with my girls. Genderless, faceless, nameless. It didn’t matter who said what, because I was caught up, drawing in strength from having Rosie and Livvie in my arms.

I preached to my guys all the time about processing calls, and we worked regularly to debrief together, especially after the more traumatic ones. But it hit me differently now that I knew I had a child of my own.

It was irrational, probably a little extreme. And I realized how much I’d been lying to myself about wanting a family. Because holding these two in my arms felt good. It felt right.

And even as I knew I was already half in love with them both, I was scared to death.

One, or both of them, could be taken away or could choose to leave me in a heartbeat. I’d been there, done that, and it sucked.

I needed to not be so all-in so early. I needed to hold myself back some because I didn’t want to hurt like I had so many years ago when Diedre left me.

Of course, it had been Olivia who had put me back on the path to healing. So it made sense that she was the reason for me coming back full circle.

Still.

This was too much, too soon. There was still so much to deal with and go through, and there was no way Olivia and I could pursue any kind of relationship, even though it seemed that Rosie wanted us together more than anything.

I had to stop this train.

I gave them both a last squeeze and pulled away from the embrace. It felt like ripping out my own soul.

“Okay. That was an experience.” I tried to sound light, but the words fell flat.

Rosie wiped her eyes as Olivia pulled her under an arm.

They looked good standing together, tear-stained cheeks and all.

I gave up the act and held out a hand to them. “Let’s get out of here.”

The boat ride back was much different from the ride over. I didn’t make any special stops or take any detours. We just made a straight beeline to the house.

At the dock, Rosie automatically helped me secure the ropes. A twinge of pride swelled at how naturally she’d picked it up, and then she and her mom went to the deck and spread out in lounge chairs.

I went to my garage and hid behind my canoe.

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