Page 38 of Tulips and Lost Time

“I want to have that secret with you.” She pauses for a moment, smirking when my eyes flicker between hers. “I’ve thought about it since I was fifteen years old and you stopped being that annoying guard dog I was trying to hide from, and instead, you turned exceptionally handsome in my eyes.”

“You’re asking for trouble.” And I’m running out of excuses. “Kari…”

She inches forward. Closer, closer, until I think my heart might stop completely. Her lips are just a hair’s breadth from mine. Her lashes, almost near enough to touch my cheeks. Best and worst of all, her heart pounds against mine.

Her intentions, clear as day and as unavoidable as a collision on the freeway.

“I’m going to kiss you,” she whispers. “So if you’re ever asked, you can deny being the instigator.” Closer, until her moving lips brush against mine. “If you love me at all, in any way or form, at any point in our lives, then I’d like for you to kiss me back. Because if I’m being completely and totally honest,” she pulls back to search my expression, “rejection might break my heart.”

I slide my hand into her hair. I don’t mean to. My fingers combing into her locks. I swear to god, I don’t make the decision to move my arm. But I still find myself cupping the side of her head. My heart, thundering in my chest until I’m certain it’ll burst free and fly away.

“Just one time,” I groan. “Because I’m not gonna be the guy who breaks your heart.”

“Thank god.” Her breath comes out on an emotional shudder that claws at my soul. But then she folds in closer, keeping up her end of the deal and being the one who starts us.

Because when the day comes and Marcus finds out what I’ve done, I have to be able to say I fought it.

She presses her lips to mine, hesitant at first. Shaky, like she thinks I could actually reject her at this point.

But then she gets brave, moving her lips, opening them fractionally. Stroking my bottom lip with the very tip of her tongue.

She undoes me.

Her vulnerability destroys me.

But her fear… it shatters my willpower.

I fist my hand in her hair and tighten until a devastating whimper rockets along her throat and out to bathe my tongue. But then I smile. Her eyes turn to molten lava. And I ruin all the ‘I didn’t start it’ bullshit when I push up to my elbow and cushion her head until she’s lying on her back, her heart thundering and her breath racing. Lowering over her, I press my lips over hers and taste her tongue on mine. I squeeze my eyes shut and lock down on every muscle in my body, refusing myself the opportunity to touch her the way I want to. To have her the way my body craves.

I slide my tongue along her bottom lip and groan when she whimpers. Suckling on her lips and tasting her right down into my soul. I release the fist-hold I have on her hair, only to growl when she reaches up and forces my hand back into place.

She wants me to hold on. She wants me to be in charge.

I fight against everything I am when my hips would have me climbing over her delicate body. Pinning her down. Separating her legs and finding comfort in her warmest places.

Because fuck, if I could, I would.

If I knew for sure we wouldn’t regret it tomorrow, I’d take her out here and satisfy the million questions firing through my mind.

“We have to stop.” I break our kiss with a gasp, pulling back and pressing my lips to her shoulder instead. A poor second choice. A mirage to a starving man. “Fuck, Bear.” I bury my face in the warm curve of her neck and work to collect my wits.

My common sense.

Marcus could be standing over us right now, clutching a meat cleaver and ready to lop my head off, and I wouldn’t even know it.

“That wasn’t so bad.” Humming with satisfaction, she releases my hand and allows me to place it on the halfpipe instead. To push myself off her chest and create space, though we both know it’s too late for that.

I’ve crossed the line I said I wouldn’t. I’ve tasted her.

I sampled Kari Macchio, and now I’m a man addicted.

“Tulips.”

Stunned, reeling, I turn and lower to my back beside her. My shoulder touching hers, and her long, wild hair, tickling the bare flesh of my arm. My breath continues to heave. To search for fresh air, and yet, it scrambles to keep her inside me.

“Luca?”

“Hmm?” I just turn my head and search her eyes. “What?”

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