Page 121 of Tulips and Lost Time

“I choose you.” She lowers into a crouch, pushing me back until I drop to my ass, then she straddles my lap and presses her knees to the floor. “And you choose me,” she whispers. Settling over my cock, she smiles and looks down into my eyes, like the fucking vixen she is as her hair drapes around us like a curtain. “You created a room for us where I get to sleep under the stars every single night.”

“And tulips,” I add. “Even though they’re out of season.”

“And books.” She looks at her sparkling ring and beams. “I see the books. And the chocolate. You remembered a conversation we had a lifetime ago, and you made it happen here, tonight, in the forever home you bought for me.”

“You deserve all the stars.” I cup the side of her neck. “You especially deserve a man who listens when you list off all your favorite things.”

“Even though that night was the beginning of six years apart?”

“Most painful years of my life.” I pull her closer and stop only when our lips are a hair’s breadth apart. “Six really fucking lonely years where my brain reminded me, over and over and over again, the things that would make you happy. I locked that list down and burned it to the back of my consciousness so I would never forget. Because on the off chance you came back to me, I wanted to know how to be the man you deserve.”

“I love you so much.” She dives in and takes my lips with hers. They’re wet from her tears. Trembling for the same reason. But she grinds down over my cock and turns a sweet moment into something else entirely. “I love you, Luca. I always loved you, which is why it all hurt so friggin’ much when we weren’t together.”

“Never again.” I pull her bottom lip between my teeth and glance across to the bed I made up for us already. “Wanna get up off the damn floor yet?”

She barks out an evil, seductress laugh that has my blood running warmer and adrenaline skittering in my veins. “We could spend time right here on the floor. Then we can go over there and try it again. Then we can try out the kitchen. And the hallway. And the bathroom since we have forever.”

39

LUC

FOREVER ISN’T SUPPOSED TO HAVE AN EXPIRATION DATE

“Iknow you’re gonna stop that story right there,” Marcus snarls. He cradles Billy against his chest and breathes like a wounded bull. “I don’t wanna hear what happened next.”

“Fuck off, farmer.” Kane turns and glowers at my best friend. “I want to know what happens next.”

Frustrated, Marcus widens his eyes and looks at me. So I chuckle, though the sound is less real now that we’re getting to this part of our life. That time we swore forever. That night we promised to never be apart again.

It’s hardly even clever irony that I’m here in that house now. With Billy. With the guys. But without my son, and without the one person on this planet I need to exist.

“She promised to never leave,” I rasp out, ignoring Kane and Marcus’ issues and turning toward my kitchen instead. My voice turns thick with dread. The pain in my heart, seemingly heavier today than it was yesterday. “We made promises inside this home. To always be here together. And now I have to go back to the hospital and I…” I look at Jess, who lingers, wringing her hands together. “It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.”

“We just have to give it time,” she whispers. Her voice breaks, aching and sad as she swallows. “I just…” she shrugs. “We have to be patient.”

“Tell us about the wedding,” Kane rumbles. “That’s the next step, right? Tell us that stuff.”

“You were there.” I chew on the inside of my cheek and spin to go to the fridge. Anything to avoid looking into their eyes right now. “All of you were there that day. So I don’t need?—”

“Tell it to us anyway,” Jess inserts. “We only saw what we saw. The gown. The church. The I dos. But we weren’t in your head. We weren’t in the moments between you and her.”

“Probably best,” Marcus grumbles. “Some things are best left private.”

“Can you do me a favor, Marcus?” Swallowing, I grab a can of soda from the fridge and turn back to search his eyes. “Can you take Billy up and get her ready to go see her mommy?” I look down at the onesie I had dressed her in. Plain and practical. Zippers instead of press studs to make a diaper change easier. But Kari deserves better. She deserves the frilly, pretty-in-pink doll she always dreamed about through eight hard months of pregnancy. “Put her in a dress or something. A bow on her head. Make a whole thing of it.”

“Sure.” He frowns and remains still. Hesitant. But he angles back toward the hall. “I’ll…” Then he nods. “Sure. Okay. You alright?”

“Yeah. I just figure it’s an important day for us all. So get her in a dress or something. Kari picked out a million of them before the babies arrived, so I thought?—”

“I got it.” He rocks Billy, though she’s already asleep, and turns on his heels cautiously. “I’ll just be upstairs, alright? I won’t be long.”

I take my drink to the table and pull out a chair to sit down. Then I look at Jess and nod at Marcus’ back. “Wanna help him? You have practice dressing girls.”

“Sure.” She comes around behind me and wraps her arm across my chest. Resting her cheek on mine—it’s a hug, but also, a chance to communicate with her husband whose eyes narrow—then she plops a kiss on my cheek and pulls away. “I’ll be back soon. Promise.”

Nerves swarm the church, palpable as though they’re actual waves in the air we can all see and feel. My stomach bounces with anxious energy and my heart thunders as the clock ticks closer to two and still, the girls aren’t here.

Marcus stands on my left, and beside him, Angelo, Scotch, and then Kane. The other side of our platform, where bridesmaids should stand, is empty. Jess, Laine, and Britt, are off somewhere else, fucking around and becoming a direct threat to my mental well-being.

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