Page 48 of The Promise

The shadow of Kyle’s huge frame looms over me, when he takes an automatic step closer, placing himself in-between the door frame and the open door itself. Then he takes a step back, like he’s unsure. His instinct tells him I'm here to throw myself into whatever he’s offering me, but the fear of rejection holds him back and riddles his mind with uncertainty. That’s nobody’s fault but mine, last time I threw him a bone of hope, only to yank it back with an invisible string the second he got close to sniffing it. Fucking hell, I've been so cruel to him. I know this and yet I couldn’t stop, couldn’t get over my crippling fear of giving myself up for someone else, for fear of them abandoning me like my parents did. To be honest, I think the scar of being dumped runs so deep into my bones, I'm not sure I’ll ever fully heal from it. But Kyle holds me together with his unwavering love and I’ve come to realise that that’s enough, it’s enough to jump and trust him to catch me, like he always does.

My voice is a gurgle of threatening tears. “Hey,” is all I can squeeze out of my tightened throat when I look at him. His under eyes are sunken from lack of sleep and his usually soft gaze is now cracked with hurt. “Hi,” he runs a nervous hand through his blonde hair, that’s thickened since I last saw him. The doubt in his eyes, the intense depth of them as he stares straight into my soul, starts the onslaught of unwanted tears before I have chance to swallow them down.

They begin to stream down my cheeks and all I can offer Kyle is a croaky, “I'm so sorry.”

“Hey,” he coos, a warm, comforting arm sliding around my waist. “Baby come here.” Kyle hauls me up into his arms and I wrap my thighs around his torso. The sensation of being cradled in his muscular grip again, makes my heart thump so hard with relief, I'm worried it might crack my ribs. He holds me for a few minutes whilst I fight the tears away, burying my face into his shoulder and inhaling every drop of his homely scent. He is my home after all and I should have recognised that all along.

“I’m sorry Ky, I'm so sorry for the way I’ve treated you.” I blubber, sniffing roughly to halt the last few tears that trickle down my cheeks. “It’s ok,” he says quietly, soft kisses dancing along the shell of my ear as he tightens his grip on me. “I’m still here aren’t I?” His tone is calm, sturdy and certain now, but I can feel the ripple of hurt still under the surface of his voice. He’s right, he’s still here after everything and that’s how I know he loves me, like really loves me, for everything I am, even the shitty parts. I finally lift my face from his shoulder, eyes swollen from crying and when I look at his face close up for the first time in three weeks, the truth just rolls off my tongue.

“I lied,” I breath out in a whisper, “I lied about all of it. I lied when I said I was leaving and this was over, I lied when I said I didn’t want to tie myself to you and I lied when I said I didn’t love you.” I bracket his jaw with both hands, “Because I do, I love you so much and as much as I hate to admit it, you were right when you said I need you, I do.”

Kyle lets out a breath, one I'm sure he was holding in whilst I was speaking and his face relaxes for the first time. “Mol, you’re the strongest person I’ve ever met and I know you like to be independent, that doesn’t have to change. I don’t have to be a burden in your life, just consider me an added accessory. The person you can come home to when you’ve had a shitty day, when you just need to cuddle up and watch a crappy movie.”

“You were never a burden,” I lift my shoulders in a light shrug. “I’ve just always had this idea, that a relationship would mean giving up a part of myself for someone else. But I can see now, that it was never about that with you. You have a piece of me that I need, you make me feel like one complete puzzle and there’s no way I can carry on without you.” Kyle’s laugh is like a wind chime. “Wow Mol, you’re going soft on me.” “Shut up.” I swat at the wide grin that’s spread itself arrogantly across his face, and whilst I try my damn hardest to act mad at that comment, I simply can’t right now. My own face crinkles into the softest, most genuine smile I think I’ve ever worn. My heart beats so hard for him, for the man who holds my entire being in his strong, protective hands, it makes me want to stitch myself to him forever.

Kyle’s nose nudges mine and brings me out of my daydream. “Can I kiss you now?”

My crooked smile widens a little more, before I crash my lips down onto his, in a kiss so hot I can feel the heat increase right between my thighs. The throbbing, desperate bud that pulses there, craving what she’s been missing for three weeks. I won’t let myself overthink this anymore, not now both of our feelings are out on the table in plain sight. So I slide down Kyle’s body and take a fistful of his t-shirt in my hand, dragging him up the stairs behind me. My feet can’t move quick enough, so damn eager to just feel his warm body against mine again. The comfort of his skin, weaving through my heart strings and tugging tighter than ever, the second his clothes are off and he’s laying on top of me. His mouth finds mine frantically and my clothes are on the ground in seconds, Kyle’s hot palm grasping the back of my neck as he pushes inside me. There’s a tiny shot of stinging pain, before the pleasure takes over. My body readjusts to the size of him after a few pleasureless weeks and when his lips caress mine in that gentle way they always do, I can’t help but let the words fly off my tongue. “You promise this is it right? That this is serious between us and that you won’t break my heart?” I say, annoying moisture building in my eyes. I’m not used to being vulnerable like this with someone. For some strange reason, Kyle just drags this side out of me, the mushy, gushy girl who can’t keep her thoughts to herself around him.

His face pulls into a warm smile. “I promise Mol,” he lifts his pinky and scoops mine up with it, squeezing tight. “You’re my forever.” My chest thumps under his heavy frame and when he presses a tight kiss to my lips, I wrap my arms around his neck and let myself melt into him. My mind floats away, to the only place I'm truly happy, with him.

Kyle

The best day of my life is almost over. The sun has long set and the shadows are looming across mine and Molly’s tangled bodies, as we lay sprawled out on the couch. The TV is still a quiet hum in the background, I turned the volume down when I saw Molly’s eyelids drooping, as she lay her head on my chest. We spent the entire afternoon and evening latched onto each other, somehow needing to be touching at all times, like we were recuperating after three weeks apart. I feel like my heart has been injected with some sort of drug, causing it to go into overdrive every time I replay the events of today. When my girl came to my front door, her heart in her hands, ready to give it over to me without any doubt of who it belongs to. That’s me, if you didn’t know, that heart has always been mine. Molly wriggles a little in my grasp, her bare legs laced through mine and her blonde braid tickling my nose as she moves. The front door opens with a click at around 10pm and my ass is totally numb at this point. Lying in the same position, with a hot blonde on top of you for so long will do that to a man.

“Oh, jeez man, you scared the shit out of me, how long you be—?” “Will you shut the fuck up?” I hiss at Sean, as him and Callie stride into the living room. Callie swings her bag over the back of the sofa to land by Molly’s bare feet.

“Oh, she’s here, you two work things out?” Callie leans back against the kitchen island, her protruding belly making her look even smaller than usual.

I nod, my eyes gleaming with joy as I peer down at the soft rise and fall of Molly’s chest. “Yeah, she loves me.”

Sean scoffs, wrapping a taut bicep around Callie’s shoulders. “Wipe that stupid fucking grin off your face Davis.”

“Sean!” Callie huffs, shoving his arm off her and jutting a sassy hip. “Don’t be such a dick for once in your life.”

Sean simply shrugs and smacks a kiss to her jaw. “Sorry, that’s the way I am baby and if you don’t like it you can—”

“What?” Callie’s eyebrows are so high on her forehead, I almost lose them in her wild curls. “I can what Taylor?”

Sean’s face is a picture of fear. His eyes immediately lose all trace of arrogance and he swoops an arm around his girlfriend, nuzzling into her neck and whispering, “Nothing, I love you.”

A display of soppy affection between Sean and Callie used to make me uncomfortable, like I didn’t know where to look and I also didn’t know why I always felt a tiny pang of jealousy. Now I know why of course, because the girl who owned my heart from the second our eyes locked, was always just a little out of reach. And yet, she was always mine, right from the start.

Pity it took her a while to accept it.

Chapter 36

Kyle

Molly of course, stayed latched to my body all night last night. I ended up carrying her up the stairs to my bed around 1am, after trying to wake her several times and her telling me to ‘fuck off’ under her breath, only tightening her grip around my neck. So, I did what any good boyfriend — that word still sounds weird on my tongue — would do and carried her up to bed like the princess she is. When she rolled over this morning and swept her hand across the mattress, searching for me, I immediately dragged her across the bed and fucked her for as long as she'd let me. She only let me keep her for an hour, before insisting we should get out of bed and go downstairs to make breakfast. That was her demand of me this morning anyway and of course I did as I was told.

The eggs hiss in the pan, spitting at me as I push them around with a sigh. I know I should be on cloud nine today and don’t get me wrong, I'm the happiest I’ve ever been. Especially when I look over my shoulder and see my favourite girl in the world, half naked in my kitchen, rummaging through the box of jerseys that arrived yesterday morning. But there’s a small part of me that’s anxious about today. The game against Sheffield University is at 7pm and to say I'm shitting myself would be an understatement. I also haven’t asked Molly to come yet, but I know I need her there, screaming profanities at the referee from the stands. There’s nothing that makes me love her more.

I’ve missed having her in the crowd when I play, even when I can’t hear her voice yelling across the ice, it’s like I can feel her in the room with me, keeping me going when I feel deflated.

“Hey, are these your jerseys for after summer?” Molly says quizzically, her face still buried in the extra large cardboard box on the island. “Yep,” I twist the knob on the stove, listening to the flame fizzle. I plate up our eggs and place the full plates down onto the marble next to Molly. “Huh,” she muses, holding up one of my new jerseys and tilting her head to one side, expression puzzled. “Why did you change your number?” A forkful of fried egg lands on my tongue and I shrug. “Just felt like a change I guess.”

That’s bullshit and it doesn’t take Molly more than half a second to figure that out too.

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