Page 25 of The Promise

“What the fuck?”

I nod glumly. “Yeah, I know, but I don’t want to talk about it anymore, I just need to lie down, I'm shattered.”

“Shall I call Kyle?” Callie hollers after me as I make my way to my bedroom.

I do want to see Kyle. I know what he’ll do, he will wrap me in his huge frame and snuggle the shit out of me until I feel better, kissing my hair and telling me how beautiful I am. But I kind of want to alone with my self depreciating thoughts right now. Plus, I know he’s swamped with games and studying, that’s why we’re going to the cinema with Sean and Callie tomorrow, when they finally have a day off. So I shake my head, thanking Callie for the thought, but insisting I'm ok and heading off to bed. I’m not ok. I know I'm not purely for the fact I haven’t eaten since midday yesterday, but I just can’t bring myself to put anything in my mouth. Every time I think of food, Harvey’s stupid face and stupid comment make their home in my brain and I can’t seem to evict them. I have a cinema date today with Sean, Callie and Kyle, but I can’t find the motivation to get dressed this morning. Callie knocked on my door an hour ago, reminding me we have to leave by 2pm and that we’re meeting the boys there, but I haven’t moved a muscle since.

When she knocks again at 1:30, this time she pokes her head around the door and I see her eyes soften with empathy as she looks me over. My hair is a mess I know, the grey bags probably heavy under my eyes from the little sleep I got last night due to my rumbling stomach and the multiple phone calls from Kyle. He called me when he knew I was home and the guy knows me so well by now that he can tell just by my less than chipper tone that something was off. I tried to convince him I was fine, but he wasn’t having it, insisting he was coming over to quote ‘make me feel better.’ I wasn’t sure if he meant to cuddle me and let me cry into his chest, or to fuck me with his tongue and take my mind off it. Either one would have been perfect, but I just wasn’t in the mood to see anyone last night. I know he’ll be onto me today, his suspicious eyes dancing all over my face, trying to decipher what’s making me so cloudy and grey today. So I brace myself with a fake smile and climb out of bed in just my underwear, Callie watching me from my bedroom door as I get dressed.

“You sure you still want to come today Mol? I'm sure Kyle would understand if you wanted to bail.” She says, her nails picking at the wooden frame she’s leaning on.

“Yep, I'm sure.” I spare a glance at her and her sculpted brows are raised at me. “Honestly Cal, I'm fine.”

She stares at me for a moment, beady eyes definitely not believing a word I say, but with a brief nod she leaves the room. I shove one of Kyle's hoodies over my head, unravelling my braid and quickly re-braiding it so I don’t look like a bird has made it’s nest in my hair, before leaving the dorm with Callie in tow.

The boys are already waiting at the cinema for us, Kyle holding a huge tub of popcorn paired with a shy smile when he sees me looking like a midget in his hoodie. I know the minute he kisses me tentatively that he wants to ask me what’s wrong and why I look like death. But he’s never been one to be direct with his words, so instead he just wraps an arm around my waist and guides me along behind Callie and Sean into the dark screen. My stomach won’t shut up the entire time though and by the time the trailers are over I feel Kyle's hand squeeze my thigh.

“You ok?” He whispers, his other hand landing on the nape of my neck, rubbing robotic circles as I nod. “You sure? You don't seem your usual hyperactive, excitable self.” He chuckles and I try not to cry. He’s so damn sweet and I'm so comfortable with him, I want to crawl inside his skin right now and never come out again.

“Yeah,” I mutter, dropping my head to his shoulder. “I’m good.” I know he wants to ask me again, to push me into being honest with him. But he’s so gentle with me that he just stays quiet for most of the movie, gripping my thigh in that sweet way he does and continually offering me popcorn, that I of course refuse. Half way through he gives me the sneaky eye and I know what he’s asking, before he dips his head and kisses me softly.

His breath hits my ear when he leans in and whispers, “Have you ever been fucked in a cinema before?” My heart beat drops between my thighs when he sucks my earlobe into his mouth, his warm tongue lashing at it slowly. “Yeah, by Ollie once,” I whisper back and Kyle sits up, eyes startled and throat bobbing. “Joking,” I tease and his shoulders drop with relief. “Can you two stop?” Callie hisses across Sean, “Jesus, you’re worse than us.”

“She’s grumpy today,” Kyle snickers and I grab his hand.

“Bathroom,” I murmur, pulling my bottom lip between my teeth and only just now noticing the protruding boner in his pants.

I stand up, yanking him with me and receiving a groan from Callie and Sean as we pass them. I don’t give a fuck though, I need something to take my mind of Harvey’s words that continue to stab at me, even though it’s been almost 24 hours since he said them. It’s been 24 hours since I’ve eaten too and as I pull Kyle out of the screen with me, my head starts to wobble. The growling is like a permanent background noise too as I steer us both towards the bathrooms and duck inside, immediately pinning Kyle's back to the door and undressing him. My growling stomach may be loud, but it’s not loud enough to drown out the reminder of how much weight I’ve apparently gained and that I won’t make regionals if I carry on eating. I need to get Kyle’s dick inside me before I pass out from lack of food. And when he pulls his t-shirt over his head, exposing his lean stomach, I feel the hunger pangs hit even harder, but now it’s him I want to snack on. Jesus, I swear he gets hotter every time we fuck. This 200 pound slab of man meat is all mine and I'm going to fucking ravish him.

I sink down to my knees and snap the waistband of his boxers down to expose him in all his glory, before taking a lap up his length with my tongue and watching his eyes roll back. I suck the tip into my mouth, swirling my tongue as his fist finds my braid, wrapping it around and hauling me closer. I let his cock leave my lips with a pop and grin up at him through thick lashes, purposefully teasing. But this guy is so much of a fucking gentleman, he doesn’t even care that I’ve stopped taking him into my throat.

He lifts me to my feet like I weigh less than a feather and points to the basin. “Get on the sink.”

I land my ass on the cold marble, wriggling my jeans off my legs before Kyle's rough palms pull my knees apart. His face dips down into the hot, wet mess between my thighs, but he doesn’t skate around my clit as usual, obviously just as desperate to taste me today as I am him. He sucks my pulsating clit between his lips, rolling it with his tongue and my head starts to spin. I’m not sure if it’s the orgasm that’s heavy in the pit of my stomach, or the lack of food for almost a solid 24 hours that’s making me feel dizzy right now, so I fist Kyle's hair to keep me from sliding right off the marble countertop. I close my eyes and a much too loud moan of his name slips right off my lips, before his hot palm comes to cover my mouth. “No yelling my name,” he snickers, lips still ghosting over my pussy as she begs him for more. “I normally love it, but in here,” he smiles up at me, moisture on his lips. “Someone might hear you.”

I lift my shoulders in a shrug, but he laps his tongue up me and a gargled splutter comes out, “Let them h-h-hear t-then.” My back snaps up from the icy marble without my permission, the orgasm crashing over me and dragging me out to sea with it. “Oh shit Kyle, I'm coming.”

“Good girl, come all over my fucking face.” He murmurs, rubbing his soft lips all over the sopping mess I’ve made between my legs. He stands straight, killer abs tensing and drawing my undivided attention there. That is of course until he positions Lieutenant Davis between my open legs and torpedos straight to victory.

My muttered, “Oh shit,” echoes around the quiet bathroom and Kyle's hand finds my mouth again.

“You really need to learn to be quiet Crawford.” He laughs, tipping his face into my neck and sucking at the skin as he thrusts sharply into me. He’s so big it’s almost too much, but I always feel like that with him. It’s like he’s the perfect fit for me, any more and I couldn’t take it, any less and I’d be a little unsatisfied, always craving more. It’s like his dick was made for me and I have no intention of letting anyone else have it ever again. Well…not never I guess, I'm going to lose him at some point and the mash of feelings in my brain just won’t line up to make any sense. My stomach sloshes and a ringing begins to sound in the pit of my ears, making the room spin like a fairground ride.

“Kyle,” I press a finger into my temple. “I don't feel well, I need you to stop.”

Kyle slows, but doesn’t take himself out of me. “What? What’s wrong?” That’s when the utter panic sets in and I almost launch him across the room. “Get out Kyle! I said get out!” I shove him out of me, jumping down to the floor and sliding down the back of the door. I land my ass on the freezing ground and let my face fall into my bunched up knees.

I don't know what Kyle's face looks like right now, I can’t bear to look at it. I just need to calm my racing heart and remind myself that it’s Kyle here with me, not…anyone else.

I trust him, I trust him, I trust him.

Kyle looks after me, he respects me and he’d never make me do anything I didn’t want to do with him, never. I know this and yet the panic took over my brain anyway when I thought he wasn’t getting his dick out of me quick enough. But I guess that’s trauma for you, it hides in the shadows so you think it’s been defeated, but really it’s just waiting for an opportunity to pounce. I should know enough about trauma by now, I’ve got fucking bags of it.

“Mol, I'm sorry. What’s…what’s going on?” I feel his shaky hands on my shoulders and I finally look up. The fear and concern in his eyes makes my heart splinter and I want to look away, but I just can’t.

I wipe the back of my hand across my wet cheeks. “I’m sorry I yelled at you, I shouldn’t have and it wasn’t your fault. I just…I need you to get out straight away when I say stop.”

“I’m so sorry baby, I didn’t mean to scare you. I’d never, ever carry on if you wanted to stop, I’d never make you do anything you didn’t want to do.” His hands find my face, thumbs tracing my under eyes and collecting my tears.

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