Page 26 of The Promise

“I know you wouldn’t, it’s just because I have…experience, of people not listening to me when I say no.” I gaze up at Kyle through the blur of my remaining tears and I can see the worry and confusion all over his chiselled face. “I was raped at the care home when I was 15.” I say with a heavy sigh.

I hate telling people this and there are only two other people in my life who know what happened to me, Callie and my mum. But for some reason, when I'm around Kyle my mind takes over my tongue and I just spill out anything and everything all over him.

Kyle's face is red, dark with horror, his jaw tight. “You-you were…holy shit Mol, I'm so sorry.” His arms come around me before I can blink and my face is pressed into the warmth of his bare chest. The comfort I feel is unmatched and I let myself sink into him, as he holds me on the bathroom floor.

I sniffle, the final tear streaking down my cheek before I slap it away. “I always think I'm over it, until someone doesn’t stop as quick as I want them to and I panic.”

His palm covers my cheek and I can hear his heartbeat against my ear. “Who was it?” His voice is smooth, too smooth and I get an itchy feeling in the depth of my chest. “Unless you don’t want to talk about it.” “It was a care worker, he came into my room one night and I…” more tears, “I couldn’t stop him Kyle, I-I couldn’t.” I splutter and Kyle squeezes me tight, burying his face into my neck and kissing me there over and over until the crying stops again. “He’s in prison now, but I can’t help but think about him sometimes. The way he used to look at me over the breakfast table, the sound of my bedroom door creaking open that night when he crept in.” I shake my head, like I can shake the memories out. If only it were that simple.

Kyle sits up straight and his hand tightens around my back. “I can’t, I don't, I can’t hear this Molly. I need to…I don't know, hit someone or something.” “It’s in the past,” I shrug, sitting up and feeling the cold space between us, the room feeling awfully bare and clinical all of a sudden.

Kyle stands up, taking my hands and bringing me up with him. “I’m always here, you know that right?” He takes my face in his hands, thumbs running along my cheekbones. “If you need to talk about anything or just need to cry on my shoulder, whatever you need.”

I let out a sigh and drop my forehead to his. “Thank you, can we go get a coffee or something? I think the movie must be nearly finished by now.” “Yeah, sure,” he kisses my lips, lingering and telling me exactly how he feels about me without the need for words. And that’s when my whole world explodes. I can deny it until I'm blue in the face, but it’s not going to change. I need Kyle, he’s the anchor in my life and I don’t want to lose him. I can’t lose him.

Chapter 19

Kyle

The cafe is pretty dead when we get there, having left Callie and Sean to finish the last half an hour of the movie alone. Molly simply followed her nose around the corner of the cinema and found us a cafe within twoseconds of searching. I swear her and Callie both have coffee imprinted in their brains. I wish I could focus on Molly right now, her bright sunshine locks, her deep blue eyes and her killer body like I usually can, but my mind is wandering elsewhere. I keep imagining her being assaulted, someone dominating her in that way and stealing something from her that wasn’t their’s to take. It’s making me feel a rage like no other, the fire in my stomach lighting and blazing so strong I feel the need to unleash it somewhere, before it can burn me alive from the inside out. She’s so god damn strong, so resilient and I know she’s been through a ton of shit in her life. But I wish sometimes she’d just admit that she needs me, she needs someone secure in her life and I know I'm that person for her. She’s so fucking brave and the gratitude I feel for her sharing such a personal thing with me is making my heart grow wings, spreading the explosion of butterflies throughout my body.

As I watch her sipping at her coffee slowly, the grumbling of her stomach pulls my attention back to the present. Her chin is resting on her palm, eyes flitting across the table as her nail chips away at the dents in the wood. She hasn’t said much since the bathroom incident and I don't want to force her into conversation if she's not in the mood to talk to me. But I also can’t pretend the silence between us isn’t stretching me, causing me to become a knee bobbing, jaw scratching mess.

When her stomach rumbles for the second time I jump up from my seat and Molly’s eyes follow me. “Just going to get a, erm…muffin! Yeah, a muffin, do you want anything?”

Why the fuck am I stuttering right now? I shouldn’t be nervous, I haven’t done anything wrong and besides, she’s not mad at me…right? Molly’s lips flicker with a small smile that she tries to hide, noting my obvious nerves. “No thanks, I'm good.”

I nod and go up to the counter to order two muffins, my own stomach is yelling at me to feed it and I know Molly said she didn’t want anything but I also know she’s hungry. The echoing sounds of starvation coming from the cave of her stomach give away the depth of her hunger. When I sit back down opposite her and push a blueberry muffin across the table to land in front of her, she looks up at me with questioning eyes.

“I know you said you didn’t want anything, but your stomach is rumbling, so I got you a muffin.” I shrug, taking an obnoxiously large bite of my own muffin and chewing happily. The lining of my stomach immediately thanks me profusely for soothing it. I’ve almost finished my entire muffin in three bites, when I glance up at Molly who is back in her previous position. Her eyes are on the table, nails picking at the wood and the muffin in front of her untouched.

I gulp my last bite down. “Why are you not eating it?”

She lifts a shoulder and lets it fall. “Not hungry,”

“Yes, you are. Your belly has been rumbling since we got to the cinema almost two hours ago.”

Molly shakes her blonde head, twisting a loose curl around her pinky finger. “No really, I'm not hungry.”

“Molly,” I groan, raking a hand through my hair. “When did you last eat?” “I don't know,” she whispers, eyes landing anywhere but on mine as they search for her. “Yesterday,”

“Yesterday?” I gawk, pushing the muffin towards her again, more forcefully this time. “Eat that baby, please.”

She shakes her head, face falling and lips turning down into a frown. “I can’t.”

I can hear the welling of tears in her throat, the croaking desperation. I don't know if this is about the memories that were dragged up for her only an hour ago, or if this is about something else entirely. I pull her hand into mine and push her chin up with my thumb, forcing her to look at me. That’s when I see the moisture in her eyes, pooling and threatening to spill. “Why can’t you eat Mol? Tell me.” I plead, keeping my voice a quiet murmur to avoid any unwanted attention.

“I’ve put weight on recently and I need to lose it so I can qualify for regionals.”

“Sorry…what?” My jaw’s hanging now, eyes popping too as I look for any sign of humour in what she just said. She must be joking, there’s no way she thinks she's fat and needs to lose weight in order to qualify for regionals. Her stomach is so tight I can see the lines of her abs when she moves, her waist tapers in and curves out to a pair of slender hips and long, lean thighs. She’s a fucking masterpiece.

Molly ignores me and just continues to stare at the table, before I reach out and swallow her small hand in my huge one.

“Why on earth would you think you’ve gained weight?” I hiss, glancing over my shoulder to make sure nobody is listening.

“I just…have, so leave it at that Kyle.”

“No, I won’t fucking leave it at that.” I run a hand down my face and then it hits me. She wasn’t having these worries when I saw her last, which means someone has put this stupid fucking idea in her head. “Has someone said something to you?”