Page 31 of Catching Feeling

“Why can’t I give you some money?” I ask. “It’s the one thing I can help with, and if it takes shit off your plate… It’s just money. I’ve got plenty of it, and I’d rather not see you stressed over something I can easily fix.”

Silence greets my question until she stands, a bitter laugh bubbling from her lips as she takes her still mostly uneaten plate to the sink. “Of course, it’s just money, right? Toss it at whatever problem for it to magically disappear.”

My brows pull together as I try to figure out what just happened to set her off like this.

“Yeah, Viv. It’s just fucking money. Why are you making it a big deal?”

She whips around, her blue irises ablaze. “Because it is a big deal. Maybe not for you, but it is for me. It’s not a big deal to you because you have it just lying around to fix anything and every- thing that comes your way. Thank you, Reese. Thank you for reminding me of exactly who you are. I seemed to have forgotten for a moment. I needed that reminder.”

Her cheeks are red and flushed with anger, and I’m just fucking lost. Standing from the chair, I walk over to where she’s standing. “Fuck, Viv. I was just trying to help. Clearly, you need it. You don’t seem like the girl who would cut off her nose to spite her face.”

“I don’t need your help. For anything. I’ve made it eighteen years of my life without someone handing me everything on a silver spoon shoved into my mouth, and I don’t need that now.” Her words drip with venom. “God, everything is just so fucking easy for you. Throw money at it, and the problem disappears. Well, you know what, Reese? Contrary to what you believe, money doesn’t fix everything. In the real world, where regular people live, money isn’t the answer to all problems. There are things that money could never solve. Stupid me for thinking I could confide in you. I forget that you don’t have real problems.” With that, she tosses her bowl into the sink and storms out of the room, leaving me feeling like a complete and utter asshole for even trying to help in the first place.

Fuck.

7

viv

BitterSWEET Apologies

I’m still upset from last night.

And also feeling slightly… bad that I lost it on Reese the way that I did. After yesterday being an absolute shitshow with a scheduling mix-up at the library, causing me to have to cover a last-minute shift, and then a distraught phone call from my mom on the way home to my car making that god-awful noise and driving weird and knowing that it just sounds like it’s going to cost money I don’t have to fix, I feel like I’ll never be able to get back on top of my money situation and rebuild my savings. Combined with the weight of trying to appear like everything is fine in my life to everyone I know, I just didn’t have the energy to pretend anymore. I’m emotionally exhausted, and I was completely on edge, and as always, Reese has the ability to get a reaction out of me, whether intentional or not.

Of course, when presented with a problem, he thinks that throwing his trust fund at it like that will solve everything.

Just when I was maybe starting to believe that he’s an actual genuine guy and not the spoiled little rich guy that he acts like ninety percent of the time.

Ugh.

I pull the pillow over my head to block the light out and groan into the fabric.

Universe, anytime you want to send me a break, I’m here to accept it with open arms.

Sighing, I toss my pillow to the side and reach for my phone.

Two missed calls.

Shit, I must have slept through the ringer. It’s barely 6 a.m.—I didn’t expect anyone to be calling this early.

I quickly call Mom back, and after a few rings, her voice slides through the speaker.

“Viv?” I can hear the distress in her voice, and I’m immediately on alert.

“Mama?” I sit up in the bed, tossing the covers to the side. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

A watery whimper is all that I get in response, and now I’m in full-blown panic.

“You’re scaring me. Are you okay? Are you hurt?” My words come out in a rush as I start throwing on a pair of black leggings and the first T-shirt I can grab from my drawer.

“Oh, honey, I’m fine. I just took a little tumble when I was walking to the bathroom. Apparently, I forgot to eat yesterday, and I had a little fainting spell. I know better—I just didn’t have much energy to even get out of bed yesterday.”

I bring my hand to my chest to somehow lessen the erratic pounding of my heart. She’s okay.

Everything’s fine, Viv. Take a deep breath.

I follow my own instructions and suck in a deep breath, then exhale.

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