Page 65 of How Much For a Life of Lies?

My itching eased off, and I was on the cusp of sleep when my door opened.

“No more tests,” I muttered, expecting Doc Jen to be hovering, but the door closed and then there was the whisper of footsteps on the tiled floor. The covers lifted behind me, and I knew it was Zach just by the scent and weight of him. I knew. He snuggled in behind me, the big spoon, his arm over my waist, his warm hand on my belly.

“Hey,” he whispered, and I made a non-committal sound. “Are you too tired, or can we talk?”

He wanted to talk about regrets and how he didn’t mean to say he loved me when we were curled up in bed. What an asshole.

“No,” I blurted.

He patted my skin and relaxed behind me. “No, you’re too tired, or no, we can’t talk?”

“Both.”

He chuckled, and I felt him shift to get comfortable. What was he doing? Was he actually going to sleep in this not-very-big bed with me? I lay there for at least thirty seconds before the unfairness of life, and the itching, and my hard-on, got to be too damn much. Without thinking about how it was going to hurt, I wrenched myself free from him, turned sharply and loomed over his stupidly pretty face, illuminated by the moonlight through the open drapes.

“If you don’t mean it, then why say it, and why don’t you fuck off now if you didn’t mean it? Because I meant it, and if you don’t care that I meant it, then why are you even kissing me and groping me?”

He blinked up at me. “Huh?”

“You said you loved me, and now you’re being all you…” I waved at his face, which unbalanced me and made me put too much weight on my arm, which freaking hurt.

“I’m being what now?” He reached up to touch my face, and I nearly got away until he curled his hands in my hair and tugged me down. “Use words I understand, babe,” he added.

“Don’t call me ‘babe’!”

He wrinkled his nose. “How about Snookums then because I can?—”

“You said you loved me!” I shouted, and he winced. “And I said it back.”

“I know. I was there.” He frowned, carded his hands into my hair, and cradled my head. “What’s wrong, babe?”

I didn’t correct his use of babe, because it was sweet, and I wanted to keep it to examine later. “Nothing!” I lied.

“I do?—”

“It’s just that your stupid face is so stupidly pretty, and I love you, and if you don’t feel the same way back, and you want to talk to me about how you don’t want me then—oomph!”

He rolled us—carefully—but enough to make my breath catch, and then it was him looming over me. “You’re a fucking idiot, Kai Henderson,” he muttered, and stole a kiss from me I wasn’t expecting.

It wasn’t fair that he was such a good kisser and stole my breath so easily. Then he moved back, and although I chased for more, I’d already accepted he wanted to talk about how we shouldn’t be together.

“Don’t kiss me again,” I begged.

“Why?”

“It will hurt more when you leave.”

He frowned again. “I’m not going anywhere unless you want me to, and even then I’ll fight you. Kai, Jesus, I wanted to talk about how falling in love with you might make us being a team hard, but if you wanted to make it work, then maybe being in love with each other might be as easy as breathing.”

I gaped as I ran his words through my head and worked out what to say. “You did?”

“Of course. I spoke to Ethan, and he has the same concerns, but maybe we don’t partner with each other on missions. Maybe we?—”

Now, it was my turn to kiss the words out of his mouth.

“I love you,” I said when we broke for air.

“I love you too.”

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