Page 75 of The Lies We Tell Ourselves

“Levi,” Ava snapped. “He’s not a dog. Stop petting him.” He grinned like a deranged pixie before turning to blow her a kiss but didn’t stop.

“Boy trouble,” Mal said, giving me a tight squeeze before releasing me so I could sit up properly.

“Ah, they’re all assholes. Don’t worry, babe, Ava and I have a plan.” Levi smirked. “He’ll be down on his knees begging for forgiveness when I’m done with you.”

“Oh god.” I hid my face in my hands. “Do I even want to know?”

“Babe, we are going to revenge make-you-over. I’m going to help you become your most fabulous self. I have an idea of what you like from when you were at my house, and with a body and bone structure like yours.” Levi made a chef’s kiss motion and started talking at a million miles an hour. I couldn’t do anything but smile. He was like a spark of infectious energy.

“Thank you,” I murmured, my cheeks blooming under his undivided attention. It was like he was inspecting me under a microscope. It was a little unnerving, but he was kind, so I let myself get swept away in his whirlwind.

“Oh. Oh, babe.” He squealed. “Please, please, please, say you’ll do this for me.” He steepled his hands under his chin. “Please walk in my show?! I want you to be my Christmas star.”

His pleading eyes seemed to grow bigger the longer I stared at him and considered his offer. “What would I have to do?” I asked tentatively.

“Oh babe, it’s so simple. I promise, you were born for this. There might even be some scouts coming to my show too. I’m hoping to get an internship at Matthieu Montoya. It’s kind of a done deal, but they want to see my final collection.”

“Sounds great, right?” Ava beamed as she sat next to me. “You’ll have the world at your feet, and he who shall not be named will be beside himself.” I sighed and gave her an exasperated look. “I know you, angel. You love him but need time to work through everything that’s happened.”

“If it helps at all,” Mal added. “I don’t think he was implicit in anything that happened. I saw his face with the blood bomb and that didn’t look like someone who knew what was going to happen. Plus, he was the one who saved you every time.”

Mal’s words took root in my mind and hope flickered in my heart. “But what if that was all part of his plan? What if he’s just that manipulative?” I tipped my head back and closed my eyes as my mind whirled.

“Hey, butt out, Mally chops. This is the Levi show.” Warm fingers grabbed my jaw and gently shook my head until my eyes opened. “Jamie, sweetie, I’m gonna pop downstairs with Aves and grab the outfits I’ve brought for you to wear. These are just a few everyday things that you can interchange with each other for different looks. Then I’ll go through your closet and put some pieces together for the next couple of weeks, okay?”

“Sure. Okay. And yes, I’ll walk in your show if you tell me what I have to do.”

“Oh my days! I adore you, my little honey bear.” He lurched forward and wrapped his arms around me, the smell of cotton candy smothering me. “This is going to be amazing. Trust me.”

With those parting words, Levi and Ava left, leaving the room looking like some kind of natural disaster had struck. I couldn’t decide if I’d made the right choice or not. I guess only time would tell, and it sounded like I had an evening of fun with a now orange fluorescent-haired pixie to look forward to. At least for a few hours I could be a normal guy, enjoying his college experience with his friends. But Mal’s words clung to me, and I couldn’t let them go.

“Were you serious about what you said?”

“Huh?” Mal’s brow furrowed before the confusion cleared. “Oh! Yeah, I overheard one of the footballers saying that Olli Stevens and Chad Prescott had it out for your guy, and they were taking shit too far. It didn’t mean anything to me at the time, so I brushed it off. But now…”

“You’re wondering what they actually meant?”

“Kinda, yeah.”

CHAPTER

THIRTY-TWO

DILLON

Winter had finally set in and temperatures had plummeted, my glass heart along with it. I knew I deserved what I had gotten—karma fucked me in the ass and made me its bitch. It hurt to keep my distance, but Buchanan said I needed to give my little crow time to find his wings again. As much as I hated him for saying it, I knew in my heart he was right. I would have been at Jamie’s dorm that same day, banging his door down if I’d had my way, but B convinced me it would do more harm than good. Hurting Jamie more than I already had would have pushed me over the edge.

Watching him suffer and become a shell of who he was though—fuck! It was nearly killing me along with the unrelenting guilt eating away at me inside. I didn’t think I would ever be able to bleach my mind enough to remove those memories. It was like watching someone slowly die and not being able to save them. Day by day, little bits of what made him who he was faded away until there was nothing left. First, it was the glowing aura that made you feel like he’d encapsulated you in sunlight. Then, the life drained out of his face, and his skin turned ashen and dull. His one vibrant ice-blue eyes were consumed by shadows, just like my soul. Every change irreparably broke a piece of me that I didn’t want to fix if I couldn’t have him. Hold him. Love him.

If I thought I’d stalked him across campus before, it had nothing on what I did now. I didn’t just wait outside his classes, I became his shadow. Wherever he was, even in his dorm, I was there watching. My grades nosedived, and I was on the verge of being benched, but I didn’t give a fuck. Coach understood—to a certain degree—but told me my puppy love infatuation had to stop, and if I didn’t pull myself together after Christmas break, then I’d lose my captaincy.

Chad, the fucking waste of space, started parading around campus like a prized peacock, telling everyone he was going to be captain next year. Thankfully, no one took him at his word. Revenge was a dish best served cold, and it was epic to watch him blow up when people scoffed or laughed in his face. The one thing I couldn’t wrap my head around was how Elise was suddenly glued to his side with hearts in her eyes. Not that I minded. Anything to keep that psycho bitch away from me was a win.

Cold wind stung my cheeks as it carved a path through the trees while I waited for my little crow to leave the dorms and head to Bean There to meet Ava like he did most mornings. The overcast sky was thick with churning shades of gray that threatened snow but so far had held off. Jamie had always been obsessed with the white shit when we were younger, and a crazed grin cut across my face as memories of past winters with him floated through my mind.

My breath caught in my throat as he slipped through the open door and buttoned up a thick dark gray peacoat. My heart beat its way out of my chest as my eyes roved over him from head to toe and back again, taking in every detail of his appearance. “Fuck.” I scrubbed my hand through my stubble as I tried to reconcile the Jamie before me with the one I’d seen close up on Friday.

He looked fucking edible, and my mouth watered. He was glowing, more radiant than he had been in months. His hair looked like spun gold, his face flawless, but it was his eyes that drew me in. Even from my vantage point, they smoldered, and it made my dick twitch in my pants. “Shit,” I ground out as I pushed the heel of my hand against my growing bulge. I needed to kiss him, claim him, and stop anyone else from thinking they had a chance.

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