Page 71 of Petals for Vicious Secrets

Internally, Hope would have to endure living with that hollow emptiness and the raw guiltiness for the rest of her life.

“Let’s go,” Hope said, approaching Ciaran, who stood next to Nina.

He had promised he would keep the epitellia wards around this area for the rest of his days, protecting her mother’s peace and guidance.

With a final look at her mother’s grave, Ciaran moured them away.

45

Lenna

Lenna didn’t want to be here. Yet she wasn’t sure if here meant her bedroom, the North House, or her own body. Not that she had any fucking idea of where else could she go.

It had seemed a wise idea to return home.

Now, contemplating leaving her rooms to encounter her beloved mother or father, or the gossipy servants that used to run to Ayla, or realizing that her sister was most surely not in this house because she was actually in Corentre learning from her Panom Guidor about how to be a fucking panom… Discouraging. The wise idea was utterly discouraging.

But Lenna was not one to hide away. So she got her panomless shit together and closed her door with a bang, heading to the only person in this House—now that Theon was not here—who would most likely not judge her or hate her as much as her own family.

Theon. She didn’t feel as if she had abandoned him, because he was a full-ass grown man who could do whatever the fuck he wanted. Nevertheless, she had asked him to go to Corentre for her, and here she was, back in the North House, without him.

That Lenna didn’t meet with any other person until his office in the library was a Cardinals-damned miracle she should be grateful for. Not that she cared about the Cardinals much anymore.

Swift steps and a familiar face followed the knocks on the office door.

“Hi, Leo,” Lenna said, and hugged the extremely stiff man before she sat on his desk. “Long time no see.”

“I need more information before deciding whether to be happy or sad about your presence here,” Leo Pharlin said, frowning. The wrinkles hadn’t changed during the past few months, neither had the gray hair or the kindness behind his green eyes.

“Long story short, Ayla is now the heir of the North House and the Organ Mandor punished me for having a female twisted mind, so I am not a panom anymore,” she smiled sarcastically, and she knew the smile didn’t reach her full-of-rage eyes.

“Can he do that?” Leo asked.

“He definitely can. It’s done,” she said. “So here I am, looking for a safe place called home but not feeling safe or at home at all. I feel so done with life. Saying done because feeling lost is closer to admitting I’m a fucking loser, even though that would definitely be more accurate.”

Leo exhaled deeply, putting his hands on his hips. “Do your parents know you are here?”

Lenna chuckled. “Not yet. I haven’t had the pleasure of seeing their smug faces when they know Ayla is the heir. Wishes coming true at last. Even though my father as the House Ruler might already know.”

“What are you going to do now?”

Lenna lifted her eyebrows. “Other than hate the fucking Organ Mandor with my whole heart for the rest of my life? That’s an excellent question.”

“Not a very productive plan, is it?” he asked, his lips twisting to the side as they always did when he asked her an academic question.

“I don’t want to let this man rule as if there are no consequences to his evil actions. But stopping him seems impossible. And… He wants to kill a friend of mine. So I guess my first plan needs to be figuring out how to avoid that. To help him in any way I can.”

“Use that brain of yours, Lenna. I know you had been looking forward to being a panom since you were little, but you only got your full powers a few months ago,” Leo said. “Your brilliant brain and rebellious heart have always been there. They are still there. You just need to give them some credit. Not all of us have magic. But all of us can make a difference, in a way or another.”

“I’ll see what I do. In case I don’t see you again, thank you for your patience all these years,” she smiled at the man who had taught her so many more important things than textbooks and history and languages.

Leo smiled back, a proud glimmer in his eyes as he said, “Magic or no magic, it’s people like you, who don’t accept no as an answer, who don’t accept the rules without challenging them, the ones who change the world. Even if you don’t consider this house your home anymore, you will always find a friend here.”

Lenna winked at him with a tightness in her chest, unsure if she would manage any words without becoming a mess. So she left, because she didn’t want to be a mess when she found her parents.

Something was missing in this place. Lenna wasn’t sure if it was her sister, who had always been around the North House ready to be to be a rightful pain in the ass; Theon, who she had always been looking forward to seeing in their next training or hanging out during the past couple of years living here, or something else.

The skin on her forearm tickled under the thin black shirt and she pulled it up to her elbow to see the incoming ink. The elegant writing made her bite her lip to hold her smile in.

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