Page 15 of Felix

Emil edges away, a blush on his cheeks. For a moment, I consider chasing after him. But I don’t want to put him on the spot any more than I already have, so I accept Tanner’s handshake and let Emil have his privacy. Hopefully, he just needs a few minutes to process.

“Thanks so much for answering my questions the other day,” I tell Tanner. “I really appreciate it.”

“Of course,” he says, seemingly happy to have given me a rundown and recommendation of the place.

Talking to Tanner did help solidify my decision to audition for Elite 8 Studios. But it was meeting Jerome and Nathaniel after the scout sent me to the studio that really sealed the deal.

I wasn’t sure what to expect of a business that makes bank from sex work. But the place is clean, the people respectful, and when I laid out my conditions—in particular the fact that I don’t want to bottom—neither Jerome nor Nathaniel batted an eye. They both nodded, Nathaniel made a note, and Jerome asked me if I had any other limits they should be aware of.

I was shocked, to say the least.

When they offered me the job, I didn’t hesitate to accept it. I thought of Specs. Of trusting my gut.

And now, somehow, that decision led me right back to the man himself.

I find Emil in the crowd, his back to me as he talks with the boom operator who introduced himself as Marco.

“Have you done this before?” Tanner asks, pulling my attention.

“Porn?” I check.

He chuckles. “Well, yeah.”

“No,” I admit, huffing a laugh. “Brand new.”

I don’t think mentioning my brief stint in high school drama would be relevant. Sure, I was told there would be scripts to follow for certain scenes, but fucking in front of the cameras is a lot different than what I did a decade ago in my high school gym.

“Well, I hope you don’t mind me saying it, but fans are going to love you,” Tanner says.

“That they will,” another voice cuts in, the only feminine one here. A woman with a perky ponytail and impeccable makeup holds out her hand. I’m careful to avoid her talons as we shake.

“Christian,” I offer.

“Raylin,” she answers in kind, letting me go. Her eyes sweep over me from head to toe, appraising. “Nice hair. And love the skirt. Do you wax?”

I cough. “I’m guessing I do now?”

“Sure do, sweets. I’ll see you on Wednesday.” With that, Raylin gives me a wink and walks off.

Tanner winces. “Don’t envy you that.”

“Yeah, well…” I shake my head, huffing a laugh. “I suppose it’s a small price to pay.”

Over the next half hour, I meet the remaining members of the cast and crew. There are a lot of faces and names, but I do my best to commit each and every one to memory.

When I see Emil near the edge of the room, finally on his own, I break away and head in his direction. He spots me coming right away and straightens, pushing his glasses up his nose. I’ve seen him do that a hundred times, if not more, and a smile pulls at the corners of my lips before I think better of it. Emil looks wary.

I stop in front of him with a small sigh. “I’m sorry.”

His eyes widen. “What for?”

“For surprising you? I didn’t know you worked here, Emil. Please believe that. And it wasn’t my intention to catch you off guard, but I couldn’t not tell who I am. I wouldn’t have felt right keeping that to myself considering, well, we’ll be working together.”

He nods, brows furrowed.

“Did I wreck things?” I ask.

There go his eyes again, bouncing wide. It’s a little surreal to be standing here in front of Specs, seeing all the nuances of his face I couldn’t make out clearly from my window. It’s a good face. Open and inviting. But I can’t help but feel like I’ve disappointed him. Like maybe he didn’t want to know the person who’s been watching him from behind the blinds. Maybe that was part of the appeal.

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