Page 12 of Mister Fireman

“I’m not about to play with you today.”

“That’s fine. I bet if you go to his house, you gon’ see it, though. But back to the knockout…”

“Oh, yes! So we moved from the car to the shower and the guest bed. By the time we were done, his clothes were washed and dry, but I told him he could just spend the night since it was so late.” I took a deep breath, stilling myself from the recollection of what had already happened. “So we’re sleep, and he wakes me up because he heard something. Gino comes charging down the hall talking about he can’t believe I had another man in his house.”

“Like he didn’t tell you he was leaving it and the bills to you,” she interrupted to say.

“Right! That’s what I reminded him of. I told him to get out, and he said if anyone was getting out, it was Dejvi. He tried to walk up on him, and Dejvi punched him. Then he picked Gino up like a ragdoll and carried him to his car. He put his key to the house on the dresser and got back in the bed like nothing had happened. The man went right back to sleep in a matter of seconds.”

“I know that’s right! Not this man was in Gino’s house and put him out of it. I’m too tickled.”

Even though we laughed about it, I told her that I did feel bad. Even with Gino deciding to move, he’d been the one paying the bills, and both of our names were on the lease. When I expressed that to her, she followed up with, “I know that’s your respect and consideration, but you owe him none. He’s moved on, not caring about you and how you feel, so you need to do the same. Change the password to your cameras and get those locks changed.”

“I am. He’s already said for me to get the locks changed when he’s done getting his things out.”

“And he’s not leaving you any money for bills?”

My head shook. “No, which is why I need to get off the phone and start looking for a job.”

“Okay, well, let me know if you need anything. Are you going back to nursing? I hated you quit because of him, but I’ve enjoyed having you back home.”

I shrugged, feeling the same way. I absolutely loved what I did but hated being away from my family for weeks and months at a time. Not working was cool because of that, but I regretted not making my own money for so long.

“I’m not sure, sissy. The money would be great, but I don’t think I want to go back to traveling.”

Very briefly, I considered what I’d always wanted to do—become a chef. Like Dejvi, I went the safe route with my career. My mom was a nurse, and I followed in her footsteps. I meal prepped and did catering while in school but hadn’t ever considered taking cooking for a living seriously. One thing I commended entrepreneurs for was their drive and commitment. I couldn’t wrap my mind around my money being dependent on the support of others. I needed a stable salary, which was why I couldn’t believe I’d quit and trusted Gino to take care of me. Now look at where that had gotten me.

We talked for a few minutes more before ending the call, and I started the dreaded job search. Even if I didn’t find a nursing position, I’d take whatever I could find that would allow me to pay my bills. More than anything, I was just glad I was able to tell my sister about Gino without having to hear I told you so.

“Well, baby, I hate to say it but…”

“Then don’t say it,” Malay said before Mama could even finish.

“Malay,” I whispered, gripping her arm.

“What? You don’t need to hear that we were right about Gino. You know.”

My eyes rolled as I stood and shook my head. Going into the kitchen to get something to drink, I heard them going back and forth. Mama made it clear she wanted to bring the issue to light so I wouldn’t make the same mistake again, while Malaysia felt like my hurt and bruised ego would be lesson enough. Daddy just wanted to know my plan of action because that was what he’d always been—a man of logic and action. To his credit, he held space for the emotions of the women he loved. He’d let us cry and vent but, immediately after, go into fixer mode.

More than anything, I wanted Dejvi. I wanted to be in his arms and on his lips. When I was with him, nothing else really mattered. That wasn’t reality, though. That was a fairy tale, and I couldn’t afford to stay in that world. So, as much as I wanted to reach out to him, I drank my drink and stuffed down my feelings, then went back into the family room.

7

Dejvi

It was my first day back at the firehouse, and as I always did, I stopped by Supreme’s chocolate shop for some sweets for the station.

“Something is different about you,” he noticed, handing me the box of chocolate drizzled popcorn and fruit.

“Whatchu mean?”

“I mean you standing there humming and smiling and shit. That’s weird… even for your friendly ass.”

All I could do was laugh. I may have bullied him into a friendship, but it was needed. He’d been closed off and guarded because of childhood trauma, and I felt it, just like I felt something weighing heavily on Enjell’s spirit. It took some work, but Supreme proudly called me his friend now, and if you knew him, you knew how big of a fucking deal that was.

“I can’t just be in a good mood?”

“This ain’t just a good mood.” His eyes squinted as he looked me over, making me laugh harder.

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