Page 17 of Don't Quit the Day Job

"Hmm, but you want to sleep with a boring attorney and have boring vanilla sex?"

"He's hot and his eyes are smoldering. Maybe Mr. Vanilla can still rock my world. I mean, if I decide to go for it. I'll see how I feel after a few days of working for him."

"So is that his nickname then?" Zara asks. "Mr. Vanilla?"

"Why not?" I ask, thinking of Max's muscular body. It's a better nickname than "Sex On Legs," and one that won't make me want to picture him without clothes on half of the time. "Anyway, I better go. I'm sure he's waiting on his coffee and bagel and I don't need to get fired on my first day. Talk to you later, Zara."

Chapter Seven

Max

"Should I fire Lila Haversham?" I stare at the thick black ink at the top of the yellow legal pad. I've created a list of pros and cons for whether or not I should rid myself of this unnecessary distraction. The pro list consists of: 1. Win the bet 2. She's fun to flirt with and fluster 3. She's extremely sexy.

Though her being extremely sexy was also on the con list as well. I tap the pen against the pad as my mind wanders and my head jolts up when I realize someone has been rapping on the door.

"Hey, Max, can we talk?" There's another loud knock on the door and I see Kingston is standing there with a smirk on his face. Remy is behind him with an amused expression on his face as well. I fold over the pages on the legal pad and drop the pen onto the desk. The last thing I need is for these two to realize how conflicted I feel about hiring Lila.

"Sure. What is it?" I ask, ushering them in. I watch as Kingston looks around the room as if searching for something or someone and roll my eyes. "Is there something you're looking for?" I already know the answer.

"Yeah. Your new sexy smartass assistant." Kingston winks as he looks over at Remington. "Dude, Max has lost the bet. He hired the most kooky?—"

"She's not kooky," I say, defending Lila even though she most certainly is the kookiest woman I've ever met in my life. "And you shouldn't be calling her sexy." I glare at him for being unprofessional. It requires some mental gymnastics to convince myself that I’m not being hypocritical, but I pull it off.

"Hey, I suppose you’re right there. I don't know her like you do," Kingston says, shrugging, a glint in his eyes as he smirks, that knowing look annoying the shit out of me. "I mean, you certainly know her well enough to know she’s not as kooky as a one-eyed flamingo, right?”

“What’s your point, Kingston?”

“I’m just checking to see if you’re sure she's the right assistant for you." He grins. “Wouldn’t want her filing all your cases to the Court of Appeals or anything.”

"What do you mean, am I sure she's the right assistant for me?" I ignore the latter part of his comment. He’s trying to rile me up, but I won’t let him.

Kingston doesn’t take the bait. He and I were both on the debate team in college and he knows better than to let banal side chatter derail him from his path. "Just checking if you think she's going to last a month." He grins again in that cocky way that would have a lesser man ready to fight. "Remember, she can't quit and you can't fire her or you lose." He counts off the pertinent clauses of the bet on his fingers and I rue the day I ever let him convince me to go along with his immaturity. We were far too old to be caught up in workplace shenanigans.

"She will last a lot longer than a month." I say dryly, though the thud in the back of my head makes me nervous. I wonder how much extra work I’m giving myself just to win this bet. I wonder if I can hire a second assistant to take up the slack, but I know that would not be in the spirit of the bet.

"Guess that means you don't want to bang her then?"

"Really, Kingston?" I glare at him with narrowed eyes. Is he interested in Lila? Is he checking to see if I’m interested in order to figure out if he can try and date her? The thought irritates me. "I'm a professional."

"You are a professional player. I also know it's been a long time since you've dipped your quill into any ink."

"Since I've what?" I stand up, adjust my tie, then tap my fingers against my upper thigh. I ignore Remy's laughter. Of course he’s loving the exchange. He’s probably hoping we’ll create a makeshift ring and start throwing punches. The man lives for drama. “What quill and ink? Did I go back in time and not know it? Am I the reincarnation of William Shakespeare? Double double, toil and trouble, fire burn and cauldron bubble.”

"You know what I'm saying, Macbeth."

"If you're trying to imply that it's been a long time since I've had sex, you're very mistaken." I run my fingers through my hair nonchalantly and sneer. Marie would say that we were facing off like roosters, trying to show our dominance over each other. She's too young to understand that sometimes men rile each other up without there being animosity or competition. Kingston is my best friend and I know he loves to tease me.

"No, I'm not trying to imply that it's been a long time since you've had sex. I'm trying to imply that it's been a long time since you've had sex with someone that you've known for more than forty-eight hours."

I stare at him. "And your point is what, exactly?"

"My point being; you fuck for the night and then you leave. You don't have any sort of lasting relationships. So if you fuck your new assistant, I don't see her staying in the job very long." He snorts. "And then I win. So I'm just saying I see several paths to a win for me."

"She's my assistant. I'm a professional. I have no interest in her like that. And I will very much prove to you that I can take anyone and make them great assistants. Even so-called kooky women." I cross my arms. "Which she is not." I hope.

"This I have to see."

"You will see, and then you will eat your words."

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