Page 23 of Kayak Girl

We reached my room, and he gently placed me on the bed, careful not to jostle my aching head. I closed my eyes in relief, sinking into the softness of the pillow. And for the first time in my life, I allowed myself to believe that maybe I didn’t have to carry the weight of the world alone.

“I’ll be right back,” he said, his voice disturbing my introspection.

It felt like he was gone for just a moment because the next time I opened my eyes, he was crouching down beside my bed, asking me something.

“I got you some painkillers. Would you like to take them now?”

I hummed a yes, pushed myself up into a sitting position, and popped the pills into my mouth. Gray handed me a glass of water with a wary look on his face.

“I’m worried you may have a concussion. Any nausea or dizziness?”

“Nope. All good.”

“Can I check your eyes?”

I gave him a thumbs up as I placed the glass on my bedside table.

“I need to shine my phone’s flashlight into your eyes for a moment, okay?”

Gray came to sit on the bed next to me and wrapped one big hand around my neck and head. With his other hand, he raised his phone and shone the flashlight across my face. Through the streaks of light, I could see Gray searching my eyes for the right responses. He dropped the flashlight and continued to scan my face. I wondered what he was thinking, but then he abruptly stood up from the bed.

“Your pupils are reacting to light quickly, and they appear to be the same size. I hope this means you don’t have a concussion. I’m pretty sure that’s what our school medic used to look for. You sure you aren’t nauseous?”

“Yeah, just sore. Nothing a snooze and the pills won’t fix.”

“Okay, I have my phone on me. Call if you need anything.”

I gave Gray another thumbs up and lay back down. Craving the safety I’d felt in his arms just minutes ago, I wished I could ask him to stay. Instead, I watched him leave. I reached for his hoodie and used it as a blanket to comfort myself.

Suddenly, my heart ached more than my throbbing nose. All I yearned for in that moment was to be by Gray’s side. I’d been stubbornly convincing myself that our connection wasn’t important, but the way my heart raced as he’d cradled me and carried me into the kitchen spoke a different language.

Gray was, without a doubt, a remarkable person. His steady nature intrigued me. And then there was his sense of humor, that impish glint in his eyes when he cracked a joke. He had a way of making me laugh at the simplest things. But most of all, it was his genuine kindness and faith that made me wonder what a relationship with him could look like.

I longed for the power to turn back time, to that very moment when Gray had asked me about my dating life. If only I could have whispered to my past self, the answer my heart truly wanted to give: I’d date the right person regardless of any circumstance. But alas, I’d told him of the ridiculous rule I’d conjured up for myself. Why had I done that? Oh, right, because I was supposed to leave in a few weeks.

Besides, it didn’t matter how I felt because he had his own rule. Gray was always only meant to be temporary. I could enjoy his company. But I could not let my heart fall for him.

If only things were different.

Chapter 16

GRAY

Elle had tried to reassure me she was alright, but I still worried about a concussion. My original plan to relax on my bunk, phone in hand, just in case, quickly dissolved. Restlessness took over, and I rose, propelled by a need to check on her again.

With each step towards her room, my heart battled between concern and calm. I tapped on her door. There was no response. I waited a full minute and knocked again.

“Yeah, you can come in,” her voice, tinged with weariness yet unmistakably positive, seeped through the door.

Crossing the threshold, I was enveloped by the dim ambiance of her room, a stark contrast to the bright chaos of the day. “Just checking on you,” I found myself saying, the words clumsy, inadequately carrying the weight of my concern.

“I’m really okay,” she insisted, her smile everything warm. My own smile was automatic, more reflex than anything, especially when I noticed, or at least thought I saw, my hoodie draped around her shoulders.

“Alright, just make sure to rest,” I said, feeling the knot in my chest loosen slightly.

I pulled the door shut with a soft click, intending to return to my own room. But as I turned, a deep-seated urge to protect her rooted me to the spot. It was an impulse that didn’t fully register in my rational mind, yet there I was, sliding down the wall to sit, my back against its cool, reassuring firmness. Positioned just outside her door, I resolved to be her silent guardian, if only for a little while.

Time blurred, with the shadows stretching and morphing into late afternoon. I reassured myself that any immediate danger of a concussion would have manifested by now. Eventually, I stood, resolving to check on her again in an hour, just to be sure.

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