Page 22 of Snatched Up By the Cartel

Mateo held up a hand, his eyes flashing with a mixture of hurt and anger. I already knew I wasn't going to like his next words.

"You know I've been thinking about that?" He interrupted, his voice tight. It was obvious he didn't like this as much as I did. "You've kept me in the dark, Rylan. You've kept secrets from me."

I flinched, his words striking me like a physical blow. I knew he was right, but I was still trying to rationalize my decisions. Maybe he was right. Maybe I should've told him about what I did before.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, my eyes dropping to the table. "I never meant to keep secrets. I just—" I didn't know if there was anything I could say that could change his mind. Maybe there wasn't.

"You just what?" Mateo demanded, his voice rising. "You put us both in danger, whatever deal you made. I trusted you, Rylan. I thought we were equals."

Deal? He already knew that much? I thought he didn't know about that part.

Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes as I felt the depth of his hurt. It hurt me as much as it did him.

"We are equals," I said softly. "And I trust you, Mateo. It's myself I don't trust." And I didn't think I had said something truer about myself in a long time.

His eyes narrowed, confusion clouding his gaze. "What do you mean?"

I took a shaky breath, steeling myself to reveal the truth. My body trembled. It felt like my right hand had a life of its own.

"You're right. I really made a deal to get us out," I confessed. "I used my connections, my family's influence, to secure our release. But it came at a cost." And just thinking about it tightened my heart.

Mateo's eyes widened, his jaw clenching as he processed my words. "What cost?" He asked, his voice low and dangerous. I wished he hadn't asked me about that, but the cat was out of the bag. "What did you give them, Rylan?"

I bit my lip, my eyes filling with tears as I remembered the weight of my decision. I wished I could say I hadn't given anything, but it wasn't true.

"Everything," I whispered, my voice shaking. "Our freedom came with a price, Mateo. A price I'm afraid we'll have to pay." The clock was ticking. I knew that the more time passed, the closer we got to the moment we would have to pay the price.

He stood abruptly, his chair scraping against the floor, his eyes burning with a mixture of anger and hurt. I could feel his anger exuding from his body. That was how much he felt betrayed by me.

"Damn it, Rylan," He growled, his voice tight. "What have you done?"

I had difficulty finding the right words. My mouth opened and closed several times, and my hand clenched.

I stood as well, my hands reaching out to him, pleading for understanding. "I did what I had to," I said, my voice shaking. "I couldn't bear the thought of losing you, of being separated by bars and distance. I made a choice, for us."

The truth was, if I could go back, I would still make the same decision every time. I couldn't imagine a different outcome. What could be different was me telling him about what happened sooner.

Mateo stepped back, his eyes flashing with pain and betrayal. I wished I could touch him, hold him, but he was too far away from me.

"You made a choice for both of us?" He asked, his voice laced with accusation. "You didn't even consult me, Rylan. You went behind my back." He took a deep breath and I knew that his next words were going to hurt me more than the last ones. "To be honest, I'm mostly pissed off by the fact you didn't tell me about what happened sooner. I brushed it off in the beginning, but now… Now I want to know everything."

I shook my head, my eyes pleading with him to understand. I was going to tell him everything. He just needed to be patient with me. It was going to take time.

"I was afraid," I whispered. "Afraid of losing you, of losing us, and afraid of what your opinion would be. I made a desperate choice, but I'd do it again in a heartbeat if it meant having you by my side." There was a moment of pause. "And, I would have told you sooner."

He ran a hand through his hair, his eyes closing for a moment as he grappled with his emotions. He was pondering what he should do. I just hoped that he was going to stay with me.

"You should have trusted me," he said softly, his voice pained. "You should have told me everything sooner. I would have understood."

I nodded, my eyes stinging with tears. "I know," I whispered, my voice thick with regret. "And I'm sorry. I was scared, scared of losing you, of losing our future. I kept ignoring what I had to do. I love you so much and there is nothing that can change that." Another moment of pause. "The truth is, I would always do anything for you."

He searched my eyes, his gaze intense, searching for the truth in my words. With luck, he was going to find what he was looking for.

"Anything?" He asked, his voice rough. "Even if it means putting us in danger?"

I shook my head immediately. "No, of course not. I will always do what needs to be done to keep us protected and together," I whispered, my voice breaking. "And please, understand that I never wanted to hurt you, Mateo. I only wanted to protect what we have. I really feared that saying what I did would make you hate me."

He was silent for a long moment, his eyes never leaving mine, his breath coming in short, sharp bursts. Tension was high. I could only wonder what he was thinking.

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