Page 48 of Heartless

Because eighteen years apart wasn’t long enough? “So, are all the Marrows off limits?” I asked, not trying to hide my frustration. “Even my cousins?”

Cyril was quiet for a long time. “In the old lands, we had a word for the two-souled. Két lélek. For a shifter, one soul stayed tied to the body, while the other roamed free. But we also talked about the lost soul. The one that can’t find its place, that’s been pushed out, or forgotten. Sometimes, it’s buried so deep inside, it’s like a poison. You need to remember that if ever cross paths with your cousins.”

I rubbed hard at the groove between my eyes. The lost soul. I guess he was saying one of my cousins was a void, but he might as well have been talking about my wolf. And that just made me regret the whole Frost Wind fiasco all over again. “Can you take me back to the Hunter Moon lands now?”

He gave a sigh, like the whole Marrow conversation wasn’t sitting well with him either, but he just asked, “The academy or the caves?”

I supposed it wasn’t surprising the man knew our best kept secret, but I still felt my heart sink a little. “The caves. You can just drop me somewhere nearby.”

He nodded, and for a while we drove in silence. I’d thought getting into the car of the Marrow enforcer was dangerous, but I hadn’t expected it to leave me feeling so raw and unsettled. How many different ways was there to learn that knowledge was a two-edged sword? Every new thing I discovered about my family came with a warning label, and a whole bunch of new questions no one seemed willing to answer. It was frustrating, and exhausting, especially when none of it helped me deal with the problems staring me in the face.

Like the fact I had left Jasper – and all my friends – to spend the night in a mating dance with Trey Barakat.

As we finally began the climb towards the Clan Caves, I felt the panic rise like a hand around my throat. How could I hope to explain where I’d been? I was barefoot, in new clothes, and about to be dropped off by the Marrow enforcer. As for the mating part, a bit of mouthwash wasn’t going to disguise what I’d done. They were wolves. They could probably scent Trey all over me. How did I tell them their Clan Luna was now also the dark queen of the Burrow Cats of the Western Ridge?

Urgh.

I must have voiced some of my panic, because Cyril said, “We can still turn around. Go someplace else.”

I realized I was chewing my thumbnail down to the nub and folded my arms. “No, this is where I need to be.”

He stopped where the road was still wide enough to turn. I climbed out, the morning quiet soaking into my skin as I gazed up the road towards the caves. I couldn’t see them from here, but I imagined I could feel them. Not just whatever reception committee would be waiting – probably involving some of those big dudes with guns – but also their Clan Alpha. My true mate, despite whatever Trey wanted to believe, or the mark my panther had left on his neck.

I paused with a hand on the door. “Can you tell me if you know the meaning of a word? It sounds a little like the two-souled one.” He nodded. “Macska. Do you know what that means?”

A slight smile touched the edge of his hard mouth. “It means cat. But it’s an endearment. Usually reserved for mates.”

“Of course, it is,” I muttered, and slamming the door shut, turned and walked towards the Clan Caves.

Chapter Twenty-Five – Vail

A dark-haired man was pacing in front of the mouth of the cave, and for a moment I thought it was the other mate I didn’t know how to get rid of. But when he swung back my way, I realized it was the much nicer, more attractive example of the Sawyer genes at work. As soon as Theo saw me, he hurried across the snow, a worried light in his kind eyes. “Vail! Are you alright?”

I pressed a hand to my racing heart. Was I? No. But that didn’t mean I wanted to wait another second before I went back into the cave. “I’m okay, Theo. But I have to see Jasper. How is he?”

“The same, the last time they updated us. But you need to think about yourself now. There are some confused people inside, and frankly, some unpleasant theories about where you’ve been. It might be safest if you went somewhere else for a while…”

I realized with a jolt that Theo was standing out here, waiting for me, so he could warn me. Didn’t matter that the alpha soldiers had probably told him they were going to string me up by my cheating, worthless tail. He trusted me enough to come out here and warn me off.

“Thanks, Theo. I appreciate you looking out for me. But I have to face this.”

He looked unconvinced, but fell into step beside me as I entered the cave. Their alpha senses must have been on high alert, because my welcoming committee was waiting just inside the front chamber. I skimmed the room, taking a quick headcount. No Clan Enforcer, which was probably a good thing, but my heart dipped a little when it confirmed Jasper also wasn’t among them. Nor were my other omega friends, although Marnie, I noticed, was standing in the corner with her arms crossed. And the hellfire in her eyes was fixed firmly on Reed.

I felt my stomach wobble a little as I met the alphason’s blank face. I’d never quite got used to Reed’s vacant stare. It always made me feel like whatever hold he had on his wolf was slipping, and the Ragemaster was about to burst free. I licked my dry lips, cringing as I tasted the last remnants of copper. It was probably just my guilty conscience since I’d used half the bottle of mouthwash. But maybe this wasn’t the kind of thing you could just rinse away and forget.

“Where were you?” Reed demanded.

I held up my hands in a placating gesture. “I know I’ve got some explaining to do, but I need to see Jasper first.”

“No.” Reed folded his arms, scanning me from head to toe with his laser eyes. He was trying to intimidate me. I got it. But it was the matching look on Charlie’s face that stopped me from forcing my way past them. “Explain where you’ve been, Vail.”

“It doesn’t matter. But I’ll tell you everything once I know Jasper’s okay.”

“And you’re not seeing the Clan Alpha until we know you’re not a threat to him.”

Frustration burned up my spine. Any explanation I gave them now would just delay things with more questions. Or worse, get me banned from seeing Jasper altogether. But before I could think of a way out of the stalemate, the hairs on the nape of my neck twitched, and I spun around to find Callum stalking into the cave.

“Let me guess,” he drawled, his eyes gleaming maliciously. “She hit her head and can’t remember a thing.”

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