Page 37 of Closing the Distance

“It’s going to be okay,” I whisper, but I’m not sure if I’m telling myself or the baby.

I turn on the faucet and splash a little cold water on my face. Meeting new people has always been hard for me. I’m better with kids. Adults, in my experience, always had ulterior motives. Their words carried double meanings I was often too young or naive to fully comprehend, which put me on edge. They couldn’t be trusted. The kids had simpler motivations for saying or doing what they did, and it was always easier to let my guard down around them. It’s one of the reasons I considered teaching elementary school, but it was a middle school teacher who saved me when I was younger—when I was so close to giving up completely. I wanted to be that person for someone else, to pay it forward.

I’m pretty sure I’d be a hermit if it weren’t for Blaire, and who the hell knows what she saw in me that kept her coming back and chiseling away at my icy exterior. It’s not something I do on purpose—more like a self-defense mechanism. All of Ty’s friends are boisterous and friendly, but are they really being that way just because Ty’s here, or is this genuinely how they are around new people? What must that be like to be so carefree when meeting someone new?

Will Ty think less of me now that he’s seen this side of me?

Probably.

And I can’t even blame him. Hell, he wouldn’t even be the first to do it.

I hate that I’m this way. I hate that I can’t laugh and make small talk with his friends easily.I hate that I second-guess the meanings behind every sentence they speak.I hate that my brain immediately starts worrying about what they’re thinking of me, but instead of trying to fit in, I shut down.

A knock on the door pulls me out of my thoughts. “Just a second,” I call out.

“It’s me,” Ty’s voice comes through the door. “Can I come in?”

My eyes close briefly as I take a centering breathand then open the door. His handsome features are etched with concern, and as soon as the door is open, he doesn’t hesitate to push his big body through, crowding me against the sink. His warm hands cup my face, and he drops his lips to mine in a featherlight kiss. Warmth from the small sign of affection infuses my bones and eases some of my tense muscles, but doubts still niggle in my gut.

He pulls away just enough to look at me, his brown eyes filled with care instead of the scorn or judgment I expected.“I’m sorry for what I said out there. It came out wrong.”

I shake my head, my gaze dropping to the floor. “No. I’m the one who should be sorry. I’m…I’m not good with new people. I should’ve told you before we came.”

“You didn’t seem to have a problem when we met.”

Butterflies flutter in my stomach as I remember the first time I saw him. The way speech completely escaped me and I had to remind myself to breathe. “That was different,” I whisper.

“How so?”

“Well, for starters, I’d had quite a bit of alcohol at that point or else I would’ve probably frozen up or stumbled all over my words.”

His mouth quirks up on the right in a small grin. “And why is that?”

I roll my eyes. “You know exactly why. You’re too hot for your own good. It’s not fair.”

He chuckles, leaning his forehead against mine. “I spent that whole night thinking you were too good for me. Too sweet. Too beautiful.”

There’s no way that’s true. This man could be surrounded by supermodels and I wouldn’t be the least surprised. I’m nowhere near as beautiful as what I’m sure he’s used to.

He brushes away a tear from my cheek that I didn’t even realize had fallen. “You made me feel things I’d never felt before, and I’m not just talking about the earth-shattering sex. Lexi, I was devastated when I woke up and you were gone.”

“You were?” God, I want to believe him. I want to believe in us, but I’m so fucking scared.

He brushes his fingers through my hair, and it feels so good, my lids grow heavy. “Walk me through what’s going on in that brain of yours. How can I make this night better for you?”

I shake my head. “I don’t know. I’ve always been like this.”

“What makes you feel comfortable?”

I stare up at him. “Being at home in my pajamas.”

He smiles again, his eyes softening as he looks at me with such tenderness, it makes another tear escape. “Please don’t cry, Precious. Tell me how to make this better.”

I shake my head again because I feel completely helpless and don’t know to explain it to him. “I don’t know how,” I whisper. If he thinks I enjoy being this way, he’s an idiot.

There’s another knock on the door, and when Ty opens it, Danae is standing there. “Hey, sorry to interrupt.” Her kind eyes look past Ty to me. “Mind if we chat for a minute?”

“Uh, sure,” I say, hating the uncertainty in my voice that gives away how I feel, putting me at the disadvantage. And there I go again. God, why can’t I just assume the best in people?

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