Page 54 of Trusting Her Bear

“Wait,” she rasps, causing me to look at her. “The man who used Breeane?”

“Yes. Did she explain his role to you?”

“She did. She was forgiving.”

“Of course she was,” I mutter. I turn my head back. “Heath is complicated. He may not always do the right things, but I know he has his reasons.

“We became a family. We trained together. Lived together. I trusted them with my life. When you live in extreme circumstances with someone, the more you rely on them. We didn’t find joy in what we did, but we knew the need for it. My first kill was a lion shifter who spent his days stalking human women, kidnapping them, holding them in his basement, and raping them. Over and over, for months. I saw where they lived. I smelled the stench of desperation that clung to them. There were blood stains all over the floor.” I close my eyes, my head hitting the door. “I can see it clearly. Out of the ten women he took, only four were left. The sobs ring in my memories.

“I snapped his neck. I didn’t feel any regret or sympathy as we took his life, and neither did those women. They will have to live with his actions the rest of their life, so the least I can do is live with the images.” I roll my head her way and see the tears welling. “We got them the help we could and moved on to the next.”

“They recovered?” she asks.

“As much as they could. We tried to keep tabs on them, but time moves on, and there is always another job. We had hundreds of jobs. We lived nowhere and everywhere. For a long time, my family didn’t know what I was doing, but they were grateful for the money I was sending. I was glad I could provide a better life for them. I liked that I could use the money covered in so much blood for something good.

“Time moved on, and the three of us became like brothers. We leaned on each other for everything. We protected each other. The letters in my tattoo you asked about.” She nods. “They are all of the letters of our names mixed up. They are buried in the blood of the claw marks, just like we were. We still are,” I whisper.

“It was harder when we had to kill shifters who had lost their minds. You know that if we go too long without finding our mates, especially for vampires, we go off the deep end. There were many of those. I hated it because they weren’t bad people at their core, but when they passed a certain point, they became out of control.”

“I’ve heard about it but have never seen it,” she says quietly.

“It’s not pretty. It doesn’t happen as often with shifters. We live a long time, but not nearly as long as vampires. They are very hard to kill, and when they are insane, it’s even more difficult. Having three different kinds of shifters helped even the playing field.” I sigh. “Vampires don’t give up easy.”

“We were stuck in this bubble of death, destruction, and pain. That was our life. We did value our role, mostly. We were protecting humans and our world. If the shifters were discovered, we would have all been at risk of exposure. We had some close calls with the police, finding the bodies of the victims before we could capture the ones responsible. Having Micah on our side was fortunate in those cases; he could change the memories and protect the secrets that couldn’t be revealed.

“You’ve wondered about my different colored eyes?” I ask, dropping my knee and turning my body to face her.

“Yes.”

“It happened on my last job. I was tired. I hadn’t talked or seen my family for a year. I was sick of staying in hotels, and some nights in the truck. I didn’t want to do the job, but a tiger shifter killed a child. He tried to kidnap a woman, and he didn’t know the woman had a daughter close by. The girl attempted to stop him, and he killed her. We had to take care of him.

“I was distracted and pissed off that there were still men like that in the world. We fought, and he stuck his claw in my eye. He must have been able to drip poison from it. Heath and Micah were late, so I didn’t have backup yet. They got there at that moment. We got the job done, but I waited too long to shift so it could heal properly. I didn’t lose any sight, but it changed the color.” I chuckle. “I’ve had many comments about it, but no one would want to know the reason behind it, so I don’t tell anyone.”

“I ended my role in the team, the jobs, and our friendship the next day. They didn’t try to stop me because I could see their exhaustion. I don’t regret leaving. I needed to do it for my mental state, but I do regret leaving them, my family, for so long. I suppose I was pissed they were late and that I let the asshole almost take out my eye.”

“You never reached out to them?” she asks.

“No. I thought about it every day. I would pick up the phone but couldn’t follow through. With my work, I kept tabs on them. I made sure they were safe. Micah continued the work, except he expanded to include humans who are murderers and rapists. He later added Bash to the mix. He takes jobs from Micah.”

“What about Heath?”

“Heath does many things. He uses a fighting ring to allow shifters who know they are going crazy to end it with dignity. I don’t agree with all of his methods, but I don’t need to. He is still my friend. I didn’t want to admit that for a long time. I miss having them around.” I roll my eyes. “Do not tell them that.”

“I won’t.”

“They are still very dangerous men, but they have a code. They will never harm children or innocent women. I won’t lie and say we haven’t killed women; there weren’t many, but we did come across some who were killing innocents.” I shift and lean forward, my arms hanging over my knees. “What did the text say?”

“Do you know your mate likes to play Games, too?” she whispers.

“I swear it was never a game to us. It was nothing like what you went through. I got a message, too. I promise I will find the one sending them. I met with Micah and Heath. They are going to help me. I think it is someone who was related somehow to one of the jobs.” I swallow harshly. “It would kill me if you were scared of me. I was going to explain my past, but I didn’t think you were ready.”

“I wasn’t, or you weren’t,” she says.

“You’re right. I wasn’t ready. Does my story change things? Do you think differently of me?”

“I do.”

My heart falls. “You do?”

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