Page 44 of Kneeling to Candy

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

BUTCH

If I was nervous before, it’s nothing compared to how on edge I am now. Walking back to headquarters with Candy’s hand loosely holding mine has me on high alert. It’s obvious I interrupted the two friends when I arrived at the house. Between Opal looking like a deer in headlights and Candy going ghost white upon seeing me, my nerves pulse with uncertainty.

Was Candy talking to Opal about me? About us?

I have enough faith in Candy to keep my bedroom antics private. My concern is more about Candy doubting she wants a relationship with me. Talking to a girlfriend about the fate of her relationship seems more likely than her discussing the kinky shit we did the night before.

Candy’s clammy hand does nothing to ease my anxiety. She’s nervous. About what, I have no clue.

The entire ride back to Fort Collins, my mind spiraled. Candy never turned down riding with me before. The woman loved cruising on two wheels down the open highway as much as any of my brothers.

However, she turned down my offer for a ride—turned me down hard. More than anything, I wanted to believe she was as tired as she claimed. My nagging inner-voice told me it was something else, though, something bigger.

Our walk back to headquarters is painfully silent, too quiet for even my liking. I open my mouth half a dozen times to start a conversation, only for nothing to come out. Candy grows stiffer with each step we get closer to our destination. This does nothing to lessen my apprehension.

We enter headquarters through the patio doors. The crowd of family members from earlier has broken into smaller groups. No one stops to chat with us, almost like they sense we need time alone.

I go to lead us upstairs to our suite—yes, ours. She may not realize we’re married, but I claimed her a year prior. My space is her space.

Besides, she has spent most nights in my room, lying close to me in bed, discussing everything and nothing. She would talk herself out, falling asleep with her hand clutched in mine. And I would fall asleep staring at her lovely face.

As I take the first step upstairs, Candy stops dead in her tracks. She stares down the hallway to the back offices. I follow her gaze, realizing she’s looking toward the storage closet at the end.

She’s longing for a secure space. It hurts my soul a tad that she doesn’t view my suite as a safe place—yet. I will need to rectify that soon.

Instead of asking her if she wants to go to the closet, I lead us down the hallway. Without saying a word, I hold open the door of the tiny storage space.

Candy slowly walks inside, turning around to peek at me.

“Would you like me to join you?”

Please say yes.

She gives me a slow nod, and I try not to get overly excited about her wanting me with her, suppressing my eagerness from showing on my face. Best to keep my appearance indifferent until I find out what’s going on with my woman. Candy may be on the cusp of breaking my heart, and she wants to do it in the seclusion of her secure environment. That thought alone is enough to curb my optimism.

I enter, feeling like a giant orc in the small space. My body is too big for my own good. To give Candy room, I lean against the door like I did the first time I stood in the closet with her. I hit the light switch. There’s no way I’m going to sit in the dark. I want to see my woman, watch her body language—anything to get a better read on the situation.

Candy paces the narrow space, wringing her hands together.

There’s a lot we need to discuss. But whatever is eating her up inside is a bigger priority.

The longer she says nothing, the faster my mind concocts wild ideas about what’s plaguing her until I can’t take it anymore.

“Goddess, tell me what’s wrong?”

She slows her pacing before stopping in front of me. She looks up at me with those warm big brown eyes of hers and hastily blurts out, “Doyouwantme?”

“Huh?”

Candy takes a deep breath, blowing it out slowly. “Do you want me?”

The hell? Didn’t I already establish my need for her?

The look on my face must show my confusion, because again she asks, “Do you want to be with me?”

She’s joking, right?

---