Page 122 of Forced Vows

"Your uncle won't allow you to pursue legal recourse," Miceli says with certainty.

I blow out an angry, frustrated breath. "I know."

I could pretend that I believe that since I'm an adult, I can do what I want. But I know that's not true. So does the underboss watching me so stoically.

"That doesn't mean I'm going to let the dean profit from treating me like crap." A minute ago, I felt helpless. Now, I don't. "And he doesn't know I won't sue. I'm an actor. I can be pretty convincing."

"Never make a threat you aren't willing to back up," Miceli says.

"Yeah, that might work in the mafia, but normal people make threats they don't plan to carry out all the time."

Miceli looks out over the dark water. Not like he's admiring the view, but like he's watching for something. Looking for something.

"If a sniper isn't going to shoot from a swaying boat in the middle of the day, he's sure not going to try at night," I point out.

Is there a reason Miceli is extra worried about someone trying to kill him?

"First, while shooting from a rocking boat might increase the difficulty of the shot, it wouldn't make it impossible. Second, it's not someone trying to kill you that I'm concerned about."

"Me? Why me? You're the target, not me." Of the fictitious sniper in the boat that is nowhere to be seen anywhere near us in the water.

"Divers could come out of the water and kidnap you, one of your cousins, or your nephew before anyone in the house even knows you are gone."

"First," I copy him. "There are perimeter guards. Second, when there's a risk to our security, we don't come back here."

"You are always at risk. Any of you would be leverage against Brogan. And now you are leverage against me." He says the last like that's an even bigger deal.

"You're ruining everything else in my life, do you have to ruin this too?" The back yard isn't just a safe space for Fiona.

All of us enjoy the relative freedom of being out here. Especially when the constraints of life in a mob family get too tight. Like today.

Besides, we're never really alone. Not even here. There are guards that patrol the perimeter of the estate and I know Ollie is somewhere in the trees watching over me.

Close enough to guard me, but far enough away to give me what privacy he can.

"How have I ruined your life, Róise?" Miceli's tone implies he thinks I'm being dramatic.

Again.

My feeling of helplessness in the face of my hijacked life boils over. "I wasn't going to be a mob wife. I was going to pick my husband, if I got married at all. I was going to have a normal life with friends that carry phones, not weapons. I was going to be an actor!"

Part of what hurts so much right now is the realization that even if I fight the dean and win about returning to college, I'll never be able to use my degree.

Not even if I divorce Miceli, which in my heart of hearts I know will never happen. Not if he keeps the promises he's made to me.

But even if I did, for the safety of the child I've agreed to have, I'll never be able to pursue a career on stage, or in Hollywood. Or anywhere else I will be in the public eye and risk putting my child (and Miceli) there too.

"Life changes for all of us." He doesn't look or sound dismissive. More pensive.

"Oh, yeah, how has it changed for you? According to you, you always expected to marry for the sake of the mafia."

He looks at me for a long, silent moment before going back to his vigilant observation of the dark bay waters. "Severu is making a bid for godfather when Don Caruso dies."

"I care about this why?"

"It's the reason we have to cement our alliance publicly right now."

"What difference does the title make? He's already a don."

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