Page 77 of It's All Sun and Games

‘Can he make you work all evening? Even if part of it is only dinner? Can’t you skip that bit, or can’t he reschedule, for the daytime, on another day?’ Andrea asks, trying to find a solution. ‘Nonna is going to be so disappointed. I know that the two of you can’t talk but all she keeps telling me is how much she likes you, and how happy she is that you’re a part of our family now.’

The only problem there is that I’m not part of the family, am I? And, no matter what I want, that’s something that needs putting right asap. We can’t keep lying to everyone like this; someone is going to get hurt. To be honest, I think someone already has. Whether it is Andrea, because I’m letting him down right now, or me, because I know that, if it comes down to it, he wants this job in LA, and I need to convince him to take it.

I sigh, really feeling the weight of the situation, but knowing that there is nothing I can do if I want to keep my job.

‘I know Rick, he’s not going to do that,’ I explain. ‘But look, it’s okay, you go to your party, I’ll stay here and do this. In a way, it’s just like we practised.’

‘What do you mean?’ Andrea replies, his face showing disappointment.

‘Our break-up,’ I say. ‘Wasn’t this the whole point?’

Andrea’s expression falls, and I feel a wave of guilt wash over me.

‘Right, yes,’ Andrea replies with a sad resignation in his voice. ‘You think I’m holding you back from work, I think that you work too much. You’re exactly right. I’ll go, tell that to my family, and you stay here, tell that to your boss.’

‘I wasn’t saying that we should still do it,’ I quickly insist, but it’s too late. Andrea looks heartbroken – just like we had planned.

‘This wasn’t a good idea,’ Andrea says, his tone heavy with disappointment. ‘I’m going to go back to my family. Good luck with your work.’

‘Andrea, wait,’ I plead, reaching out for him.

He approaches me and takes my hand. Then I realise it’s the hand with the engagement ring on.

‘I will need to take this back,’ he says simply. ‘If I tell my mamma that we’re over, she will worry if I don’t have her ring.’

‘Right, yeah, of course,’ I say as I remove the ring – thankfully it goes on and off really easily now, almost like it was made for me. It’s not mine, though, is it? ‘So, it’s really over?’

‘Sì,’ Andrea confirms with a heavy sigh. ‘Good luck, Robin.’

He leans in, kisses me on the cheek, and then he leaves.

I sit down on the sofa and drop my head into my hands. I feel terrible, of course I do, but this whole thing has always been about work.

I just need to grab my laptop and get on with it. Otherwise, what was it all for?

34

It’s been a couple of hours, maybe – I haven’t even had the time to check the time – that I’ve been sitting in this small room, alone, putting the finishing touches to the slideshow that Rick has demanded I put together. Usually, something like this wouldn’t take me so long to do, this is child’s play to me, but I cannot get Andrea out of my mind. If there is one thing that so very clearly means the world to him then it’s his family – and his nonna, given how precious she is, is probably the most important one. Well, when someone gets to a hundred, how do you stop yourself from wrapping them in bubble wrap, trying to keep them as safe as possible, for as long as possible?

There’s a knock on the door before James walks in, closing the door behind him.

‘Robin, how’s it going?’ he asks.

‘Yeah, good,’ I reply. ‘This last slide is just about done.’

‘That’s great news,’ he says. ‘Rick has gone for a shower, because all of the pacing back and forth has made him sweaty, the girls have gone for a coffee, and I’ve sent Henry off to grab some drinks so, yeah, it’s just the two of us now. All alone.’

James walks behind the sofa, where I’m sitting, and begins to massage my shoulders. He moves between my shoulders and my neck, working both sides with his thumbs. I think it is supposed to relax me, but there is far too much tension in those bad boys for that to work right now.

‘I missed you last night,’ he tells me, giving my shoulders a squeeze. ‘I know we’re not actually sharing a room, but I was sleeping well, knowing you were only on the other side of the wall. I would lie in bed, thinking about you – I couldn’t get you out of my mind.’

I smile to myself. Is he… is he actually being sweet right now? Or trying to be, maybe?

‘Oh, I’m sure you don’t need me to sleep well,’ I reply.

‘I think we all need you a lot more than you realise,’ James corrects me. ‘Rick needs you – I think he thinks that your idea is going to be the one that lands us the client. Liz needs you because, without you around, I don’t think she would have quite as much drive – I’m pretty sure everything she does is with a view to beating you. And then there’s me. I need you. I really need you, Robin. I need you right now.’

And this is it. This is the exact moment that all of this has been for. Sitting here in this room, with James massaging my shoulders, confessing that he needs me – I’ve probably had dreams that started out exactly like this.

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