Page 64 of Collide

And here I go being a sap again. It’s not like we don’t live together.

But today was also the anniversary of his parents’ death. He wanted the day to be fun for Cooper.

Noah pressed his lips to the top of Cooper’s head. “Wake up, baby. I need food.” He knew Cooper would, too. The other man was always hungry when he first woke up.

Cooper rolled over, and then winced. “Fuck.”

“I’m sorry you’re sore.” Noah kissed him again.

Coop’s sleepy eyes caught his. “I’m not.”

Noah leaned in. As their lips were about to touch, Coop’s stomach growled this time, making both men laugh. “Food first. I’ll kiss and make it better later.” Noah winked, trying not to smile at the cheesiness of his own line.

Both men climbed out of the bed and went to shower together. It about killed Noah not to touch him but he knew if he did, he’d want to fuck Cooper again. He wanted him to get a break, because he definitely had to be even sorer than he was letting on.

He watched as Coop dried off, then, pulled on a pair of boxer-briefs and shorts. His T-shirt stretched over the muscles that Noah loved so much, and damned if he didn’t start to get hard.

“If you keep looking at me like that, we’re never getting out of here.” Coop’s eyebrows went up.

“I can’t help it. You’re sexy.”

“And you’re not? Still, if we don’t eat I might waste away, and then I won’t have any energy left for tonight.”

Noah laughed, pulling his shirt over his head. “We wouldn’t want that.”

They went to an out-of-the-way diner and had breakfast. Questions ate a hole through Noah. Was Cooper okay? Was he thinking about his parents and hiding it? Was this thing between them really going to work?

He kept them all locked inside, thinking there was a better time to discuss it than now.

After lunch they headed to the lake. They had fishing supplies, chairs and whatever else they needed in the back of Coop’s truck. They parked on the side of the tree-lined, quiet road before making the short hike down a hill, and to the water.

They had their fishing poles in the water for about an hour when Noah looked over at Coop in the chair beside him. He hated asking but couldn’t stop himself. “How ya doing, man?”

“About which thing? Because of what today is or because of what we did last night?”

Noah shrugged. “I don’t know. Both, I guess.” His heart paused its beat, waiting for Cooper’s answer.

“I know I should feel strange, because of last night, but I don’t. I’m shocked I did it, and more shocked that I liked it so much. There’s a part of my mind that still tells me this isn’t what I should be doing. I shouldn’t want you inside me, Noah, but I do. That part is stronger by a million times. I guess… ,” he stopped as if to think over his words. “I guess, it doesn’t matter what I think I should want. What matters is what I need, and that’s this, whatever this thing is between us. I feel more like myself when I’m with you, than I ever have.”

Noah’s heartbeat began again. He reached over and laid a hand on Cooper’s strong arm. “Such a fucking sweet talker,” he teased.

“I know. I’m good, right?”

Even though it had been Noah who lightened their moment, he didn’t let it last. “It might be different for me because I’ve been with men, but everything else is the same. I’ve only ever felt completely at ease when I was with you.”

Cooper grinned. “See? I am good.”

Noah shook his head. “You’re an ass. Now what about the rest of it? Your parents?”

“I still miss ’em like hell, Noah. There’s a part of me that knows it’s been so long, I shouldn’t feel it this deeply, but I do. I’m okay though. I think they’d be happy to know I’m happy.”

He had no doubt Cooper’s words were true, but the tone of his voice and the look in his eyes, said his lover was feeling things more than he wanted to share. That had always been Coop. He felt guilt for things that weren’t his fault. And Noah knew Cooper would always blame himself for leaving his parents behind in that house, even though there was no way he could have saved them.

Before Noah could push the conversation farther, Coop’s fishing pole jerked in his hand. “Well lookie here, Noah. Looks like I’m catching dinner.”

***

Catching the fish couldn’t have come at a better time. He’d known Noah would push things and Cooper wasn’t in the mood to deal with it. Not that he minded talking to Noah about it. The man was about the only person he really could, but not now. Not this weekend. He wanted this to be about them.

---