Page 93 of The Devils' Darling

The bang at my door makes me jump.

I ignore it. Kirill texted me earlier, saying he wants to go get some things for Dom’s birthday and asking me to go with him. It’s the last thing I want to do. Who gives a fuck about birthdays? Nothing much matters anymore.

The knock comes again, and I sigh. “Fuck off, Kirill. I’m not in the mood.”

“It’s me,” a feminine voice calls through the wood.

My heart leaps.

Mackenzie.

I contemplate turning her away, too, but she sounds scared. Her voice is small and wavering.

My protective instincts kick in. My head thumps when I force myself from horizontal to vertical, but it’s not as bad as it was. Not bad enough for me to justify still taking the full amount of pain meds and washing them down with bourbon at night.

Mackenzie is pale when I open the door, and she’s clutching a pharmacy bag in her hand. Fuck, is something wrong with her?

“Can I come in?” she asks.

“Yeah, of course.”

She slips into the room and wraps me in a hug. I stiffen a little, not worthy of her affection when I’ve been so shit since her mother died.

Biting her lip, she eyes me warily. “Do you still love me, Tino?”

Her question hits me hard. “What? Of course. Jesus, Mackenzie, don’t ever doubt that.”

“Why are you avoiding us?”

I laugh and can’t help the bitter edge. “I think that goes both ways.”

Her lips tighten, and she flicks her gaze around the room, landing with unnerving focus on the pill bottle by my bed.

“How is your pain?” she asks.

My muscles tense, knowing she’s asking because of the meds. “It’s bad. Why?” I’m being defensive, but I can’t help it.

“Because I am worried about you,” she says softly.

“I’m fine. Focus on yourself.”

“That’s why I’m here. I’m scared, Tino. I was going to do this alone and then tell you all after, if I needed to, but I can’t. You’re the calmest. The one I trust the most to have my back with this. But … if you’re not feeling up to this ….”

“Are you sick?” I demand.

“No. Not sick, but um, I might … I might be pregnant.”

I stare at her as the shock hits me. Then it’s followed by the desire to laugh at myself and my stupidity. Why the shock? We all knew this might be in the cards. In many ways, we encouraged it. Played with fire.

Now I might be about to get burned because I’m in no place to be a good father.

“Oh, my God.” Mackenzie’s expression takes on a tinge of horror as her mouth falls open. “You don’t want this. You … shit.” She covers her face with her hand and shakes her head. “I made a mistake. I’m sorry I came to you, but you … Forget it. I can sort this out myself.”

Sort it out? What does she mean by that? Out of the fog of my self-pity, I get a grip and grab her arm as she tries to leave.

“No, Kenzie, don’t go. It’s not that at all, I’m just a bit screwed up, here, if I’m being honest.”

Her gaze flicks back to the nightstand. “The pills?”

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