Page 44 of Warped

Chapter Nineteen

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I waited in the car a couple of blocks from the NYPD station. I sat low in the seat, my arm resting on the bottom of the driver’s window, my fingers pressed against my temple, so my hand obscured the side of my face.

Vee’s words stayed with me—how she’d said my past would catch up with me, and I couldn’t live like a normal person. Not having my memories made me feel vulnerable and ill-prepared. At least when Harvey had been alive and helping me, I felt like he gave me a glimpse into the person I was, and he had knowledge about the people I’d worked for and some of the jobs I’d carried out. Now I had Vee, but I didn’t think we’d known each other that long, and I didn’t know how much she knew about my job.

There might even be eyes on me now. Someone with a vendetta against me could be watching the car, or even worse, watching Vee. Wanting my memories wasn’t only about my own frustration or my desire to remember the time I had shared with Vee, it was about both of our safety.

I needed to get Vee to tell me everything she knew about me in an effort to get them back. It was the only thing I could think of that would help.

I caught sight of her familiar shape hurrying down the street toward me. She walked with her head down, her long hair falling over her face to hide her identity. She was frightened for her life, and her living with such fear made my insides contort with cold anger. I wanted to wipe out every son-of-a-bitch who instilled such emotions inside her. The memory of the blue and green bruises around her throat caused my fury to increase. If I’d known about Tony the Hound putting his hands on her when I’d been at his place, I wouldn’t have left without making sure I’d put a bullet in him first. I didn’t know how all of this was going to end, but I planned on making sure Tony paid for what he did to Vee.

Leaning across the car, I opened the passenger door for her. She slid onto the seat and pushed her hair out of her face.

“How did it go?”

She sighed. “As well as could be expected, I guess. He’s going to pass on that phone number to the prosecutor on the case, and wants me to call him with an address after we find a motel.”

“That all sounds good.” I wondered why she seemed so down. It seemed like something other than people wanting her dead was bothering her.

“Yeah. I just wish I could do more for my sister.”

“You mentioned her to the detective?”

“He said they couldn’t do anything because she was turning eighteen in a couple of days and could choose to live with whoever she liked. I wish she was either a lot younger, so she would be forced to do as she was told, or else a lot older so I didn’t have to worry about her so much.”

I offered her a small smile. “You’d still worry about her, no matter her age. She’s your sister.”

She gave that sigh again. “Is it awful of me to say that sometimes I wish I didn’t have a sister? Life would be so much easier if I only had myself to worry about.”

“But now you have me.” I was testing her with my words. I didn’t think I’d been mistaken about the connection I felt between us, but she’d backed right off when I’d said I loved her. I believed she loved me, too, even if she wouldn’t admit it to herself. What she was saying now about wishing she didn’t have to worry about her sister made me think this was the exact reason she wouldn’t admit her feelings about me.

She smiled, but it appeared forced and tired. “I shouldn’t have to worry about you. I thought you were big and ugly enough to look after yourself.”

I gave her a wink. “Too damn big and ugly to kill, anyway.” I tapped the side of my head. “Can’t make any promises for what’s up here, though.”

My words generated a laugh from her, and the sound made my chest feel full. I’d mock myself every second of every day if it meant I’d get to hear her laugh.

I remembered what she’d said about needing to get something to eat. “Let’s go and find somewhere for takeout, and then go to a motel.”

“What about Harvey’s place? Shouldn’t we be doing something? It feels wrong to steal his car and abandon his apartment. He might have loved ones. Don’t they deserve to know he’s dead?”

“I’m not sure he had anyone. He never mentioned anyone when I asked him, and no one came to the apartment. He worked, I know that, but I’m sure his business associates can handle a couple of days of being kept in the dark. Taking care of us, of the ones who are still alive, is more important.”

She nodded in agreement. “Didn’t you have anything there you want to collect?”

“All I have are the clothes on my back. I threw out the ones I was wearing when they found me. They were a mess.”

“We’re both going to need new things, then,” she said. “I don’t have anything either.”

“Not a problem. I have the credit card. We’ll be fine.” I wondered how I went about paying the balance on it, or even if there was much credit left after the hospital bills. I must have money stashed somewhere. It was frustrating how I got glimpses of small parts of my past, but rarely did they seem to be the important ones.

We found a drive-thru for fried chicken, and ate sitting in the car, both of us hungrily stuffing greasy chicken and limp fries down our throats. We didn’t speak as we ate, only stopping to take sips of our sodas before going back to eating. Vee managed three pieces of chicken and a large fries before declaring herself beaten. I went on to polish off the remainder, bringing my total up to twice hers.

“Where do you put it all?” she said, laughing. Color had returned to her cheeks, the food warming her from the inside out. The drained look I’d worried about earlier had vanished, and she seemed more like her old self.

Not that I was totally sure I could remember what that was yet.

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