Page 67 of Hidden Desire

Lena sighed and took a sip of her water. “You seem quiet. I mean, more so than usual.”

“Just a lot on my mind.” Sage popped a chip into her mouth. A lot that didn’t depend on confiding it all over a light snack. “Wonder how much longer this will go on. I guess I thought maybe we’d have someone reaching out to us. I don’t know…Noah, or Martin Hewitt, someone.” She shrugged and took another chip in her hand.

“You mean Stassi’s father?” Lena rolled her eyes. She regretted telling Lena that news, as Lena had yet to let go of it. “I just can’t believe Stassi would keep something like that from you. You were supposed to be lovers and tell each other everything. Stassi didn’t seem like the person that could hide such big news. It goes to show that you don’t know who you were dealing with.”

“Stassi is a good person,” Sage snapped. She bit her tongue and looked down at her water bottle. One more outburst, and it would appear that Sage was more lost than she wanted to appear.

“Good person or not,” Lena began. “She should have told you.”

Sage looked back up and met Lena’s gaze. “I can almost understand why she didn’t. Sure, it would have been less of a blow if I had learned sooner, but I get it. It’d be hard to confide in something so big. Especially if since she didn’t know how I would respond.”

“She knew. Which is why she kept it from you.”

Sage stood up from the cement flower bed. “Is there a point to this? If not, we should get back to work.”

“Don’t be angry, Sage, I’m trying to help you out here. I know that you loved her.” Sage looked down at her hands that were twitching around the water bottle. “You can’t close your heart to a new love. It’s out there and ready for you to reach for it whenever you want.”

Sage shook her head and looked up to meet Lena’s gaze. “I’ll remember that, but you remember that it’s only been a few weeks. Not nearly enough time to grieve.” She turned on her heel and stepped away from her best friend. Especially, when she was still fighting the urge to go to Stassi. She missed her and wanted to feel the excitement they shared together. Nothing was going to suddenly take that away.

Stassi

Five weeks. It’d been five weeks since Sage and Stassi had the falling out and five weeks since the union had formed. Stassi couldn’t believe she had made it more than a month, but she didn’t make it freely. She felt every pain she could inside whenever she was forced to walk by Sage. And, what’s worse, she knew that her heart would never fully be healed as long as they weren’t able to be together.

Stassi entered her lonely apartment, ready for another night of sitting in front of the TV, surfing until she ultimately decided to just go to bed. It wasn’t a fulfilling evening, but at least it didn’t require getting dressed and going out on the town. Something she once craved now held no appeal.

She padded into the living room, her fuzzy socks making a swishing noise on the linoleum. Her lounge pants were baggy, and her t-shirt was two sizes too large. The ideal outfit to wear when you have nowhere to go. She wouldn’t be sad about that. She grabbed a bowl and loaded it with ice cream, then piled it high with whipped cream. She grabbed a cheery from the refrigerator and plopped it onto the top. All she needed now was a variety of toppings, but she could do away with those. She sat down on the couch, grabbed the remote, and began her nightly routine.

She was half a bowl gone when there was a knock on her door. She groaned. “Who could that be?” She wasn’t exactly dressed for visitors. Her hair was pulled back into a messy bun. She had no makeup on. And she just wanted to cower down in front of the door and pretend no one was there. When two more knocks came, she cringed. So much for a restful night in. “I’m coming,” she grumbled. She peeked through the peephole and shook her head. “I’m fine. Go away!”

“Stassi!” Ariel pounded on the door. “Open the door up right now before your whole apartment building comes running out to see the commotion.” She paused for just a second before she added, louder, “I mean it.”

Stassi threw the door open. “I’m good. No need to be here.” She gave a curt nod to Natalia.

Ariel looked her over. “No offense, but this doesn’t look like you’re good. In fact, this is the opposite of good.”

Stassi admitted that she was depressed, at times, but she felt that she had every right to be. She was mourning the loss of her relationship. Give her time and she was bound to be fine. She looked down at her attire. “I’m sorry I’m not presentable, but it is after eight on a Friday night, and I was not expecting company. But you’re here, so… do. You want some ice cream?” She held up the bowl and started to turn toward the kitchen.

Ariel latched onto her shoulder and pulled her back. “Not so fast. You’re coming out with me.”

“Ariel, I told you this wasn’t a good idea. If you broke up with someone, you wouldn’t want anyone hounding you.” Natalia tilted her head. “How about we go away and come again when Stassi expects us.”

“Listen to Natalia, she’s the smart one.” Stassi took a bite of her ice cream, but Ariel pulled the bowl out of her hand.

“This isn’t you, Stassi. Get dressed. Tonight is ladies’ night, and you just mind find another woman that will strike your fancy.”

Stassi groaned and looked to Natalia. “Can you believe this chick?”

Natalia shook her head. “Still love her, but she’s insufferable.”

“I’m not taking no for an answer,” Ariel argued.

Five minutes later, Stassi was whisked away to her bedroom, where an outfit was laid out for her, and her makeup and hair were done just as if she were working on a modeling gig. The scene was all too familiar, and twenty minutes later, they entered the club.

Stassi glanced around and acknowledged that Ariel was right. Ladies night was in full swing. She grabbed a beer off of a passing tray and took a swig. The beer didn’t hurt. She couldn’t keep up that, though, with just a bowl of ice cream to back it up. The three of them sat down, and they ordered nachos and fries, along with a side of fried pickles. Stassi glanced around the club, checking to see if she recognized anyone, and was grateful that she didn’t.

She continued to sip on her beer as Natalia and Ariel spoke with one another. Stassi tapped her foot, questioning why she even needed to be there. They looked all too consumed in each other to even know that she was there. Stassi stifled a yawn and was relieved when the food arrived at the table. She would at least have that to keep her company.

Natalia reached across and grabbed a pickle, then looked to Stassi. “Wanna dance?” she asked.

---