Page 99 of Mob Princess

“I may have grown up in Montreal, but the mob there isn’t that different from here. Just because we’re Canadian and polite doesn’t mean we’re weak. Don’t underestimate what I grew up with and what I’ve seen. I’m not ignorant of what goes on, so there’s no dark to keep me in. Tell me the stuff I need to know to stay alive if I get separated from you. If this could happen—if Sean is—then it could be any of us. I deserve to be prepared.”

They’re silent. I look at all of them. They—Fucking A. For fuck’s sake.

I open my purse and dump out the meager contents. I unlock my real phone and hand it to Shane. I unlock the two burners and hand one to Cormac and one to Seamus.

“Keep them.”

I snap at them because they don’t trust me. They think I might call my brother or someone in Boston. Or that I’ll squeal to my grandfather. I close my eyes and sit back against my seat, squashed between the giants. I’ve never felt smaller despite my height. I wish I were small enough to disappear. I know we’re all tense because we don’t know where Sean is. The unknown only amplifies it for me. Not knowing or trusting me amplifies it for the guys. I keep reminding myself we all want the same thing. Sean’s safe return.

We ride in silence until we reach Dillan and Mair’s home. It isn’t far from the neighborhood where all the other married syndicate couples live. I don’t just mean the O’Rourkes. I mean all the syndicates. The Four Families is what they’re called now. I guess one of the Mancinelli wives coined it. Whichever woman it was is right.

The O’Rourkes are the Irish, the mob. The Diazes are the Colombians, the Cartel. The Kutsenkos are the Russians, the bratva. The Mancinellis are the Italians, the Mafia.

Sean’s generation and his parents’ basically commandeered two neighboring communities and have taken over in the past thirty years. Really, within the last five because that’s when Sean’s generation started moving in. Five bratva couples, six Mafia couples, and now two mob couples. I thought we might be the third. That makes my heart ache as I wonder where Sean is and what’s happening to him.

We drove past several of these homes the night Dillan and Mair hosted Sunday dinner, and we’re doing it again. I can tell the guys are even more vigilant than Sean and Shane were when we rode together that night. Cormac and Seamus’s parents hosted the second Sunday dinner, and the twins weren’t any more at ease while driving through the other neighborhood. If they hadn’t taken me this way before, their hyper awareness would only add to my anxiety. Knowing they’re scanning every inch of our surroundings makes me feel mildly safer.

We pull into one of the five garages at Dillan and Mair’s mansion. I know the rules, so I don’t even unfasten my seatbelt until the garage door closes and Finn turns off the engine. I slide out on Seamus’s side and follow the men inside. Sean’s parents, Breda and Rowan, rush to me. They engulf me in a hug that threatens to break me—physically and emotionally. They nearly suffocate me, but the comfort I feel—that I need—is reassuring me. Breda reminds me of my mom, and the familiarity is welcome. But it’s Rowan’s hug that I want to turn into. Irony is a bitch. He has the same name as my father, but he couldn’t possibly be more different. Be more of a dad.

I may call Sean Daddy as a term of endearment, but he’s not even remotely a father figure to me. I don’t see him that way. But Rowan is the dad I wish I had. I saw how he was with his three sons and three nephews. I know he treated me kindly and spent time getting to know me at the family meals. My dad never did that. Hugs from him were to be endured and blessedly brief. He never took an interest in me unless I could do something for him. And my dad was incapable of being kind to anyone other than my stepmom.

I don’t want to be inappropriate or make anyone uncomfortable, so I pull away. Breda and Rowan keep their arms around me as they guide me to the living room. Everyone is there. But it’s so quiet while we look at each other. The men drift toward Dillan’s office, and that leaves me with Breda and her sisters Saoirse and Siobhan. Mair and Ally are beside me on the sofa with Ally in the middle.

Saoirse, Siobhan, Mair, and Ally chat, but Breda and I stare off into space. I can’t imagine what she’s going through. A month ago, her son got shot in a town a hundred-and-fifty miles away. Now, he’s disappeared. She appears calm, but I know how I feel about Sean being gone. I want to climb out of my skin because I think I’m in love. But if it were my child—my youngest child—I wouldn’t have my shit together. It would be splattered all over the walls. If Sean and I make it—not because he lives, but because we’re compatible—I’ll have to become a mom like her. Am I strong enough for that?

A phone ringing interrupts the low murmur of voices. I look at the purse by my feet. The guys gave me the phones back. Turning them over unlocked placated them. They didn’t want them, so they handed them to me as we pulled into the garage. It’s a burner. I recognize the number. Do I answer here, so they can report everything to the guys? Or do I take it in private in case it has nothing to do with Sean?

“Excuse me.” I stand and walk to the foyer. Everyone can still see me from the living room. I inhale and tap the screen. “Hello.”

“Nikki, where are you?”

“Safe. Is Ewan dead?”

Justin hesitates before he answers. “No. The doctors plan to release him tomorrow. It was touch-and-go the first few days. He’s been improving. He’s been asking for you, Nik.”

“That’s nice.”

“Nikki!”

“What? It’s nice that he’s improving and that he’s well enough to ask for anyone.”

“He’s only been asking for you.” I know what he isn’t saying. My brother hasn’t even asked for Ellie.

“Justin, I don’t want to talk to him. I can’t right now. I have other stuff going on.”

“You mean Sean being missing?”

I freeze. Only my eyes move, and that’s to dart a glance at the women in the living room.

“What do you mean?”

“Nikki, we know someone took Sean.”

“Because Ewan ordered it.”

“No.”

“Colt?”

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