Page 31 of Mob Star

“I do. But, Finn, are you why she said nothing about us?”

“She knows I’m the owner.”

He’s being cagey. I think he must have, but it doesn’t feel worth pushing him on. He wanted to be sure I enjoyed it and wasn’t insulted. Again, considerate. He helps me on with my jacket. But just as we get to the door he gets a call. He apologizes but has to step away. It leaves me looking around.

“He’s into you.”

I turn around to find Heidi right behind me. What do I say to that? I know?

“I’m into him.” It’s true.

“Finn’s a good guy. If he’s with you, then he wants to be with you.”

I don’t understand, and it must show.

“The O’Rourke men don’t date casually. I can tell he told you about our arrangement. He ended it yesterday, and I get why now. He’ll look at me like a little sister, and that’s cool. There were more years that he was like an older brother. But let me give you a word of advice.” She pauses. I nod. “I can tell you know what he is. If you can’t accept giving all of yourself to him but never getting all of him back, leave now. It’s unfair, but you’ll break his heart. He doesn’t deserve that.”

“Heidi?”

Finn walks up behind me, and I don’t know if he heard any of what she said. I turn toward him and smile. He looks nervous. Then I look back at Heidi.

“It was nice to meet you. I think you’re right.”

She nods and walks away. I know Finn wants to know what I meant, but he won’t ask. He’s told me he’ll respect me not wanting to share my thoughts. But this isn’t something I want to keep from him. I don’t see any reason to.

“She was being nice, Finn. She said you’ll look at her like a little sister, and she’ll go back to looking at you like a brother. That you guys were like that for longer than you weren’t.”

“She’s right.”

“She also gave me a piece of advice that I think I’ll heed.”

He still doesn’t ask me to share. But he appears curious. When I offer nothing, he turns us toward the door. We step outside, and we’re more alone than a moment ago. I step around him and turn.

“I don’t completely understand Heidi’s advice, but I think she’s right. She told me I have to accept giving all of me to you but not receiving all of you back in return. If I can’t live with that, then I should walk away.”

He glances back at the door, and now he really doesn’t seem thrilled that she spoke to me. I put my hand on his forearm.

“She’s right, isn’t she?”

“Yes. I’d just hoped to get through the first date without having to explain more about my life that I wish didn’t exist. I hoped to end the evening on an uneventful note.”

End the evening?

“Thea, I can’t escort you home. I have to meet with my cousins. Something came up with Shane’s import/export business. A shipment of rugs from India got lost in transit. I need to run some numbers to see what the losses will be and what we want to claim with the insurance company.”

That sounds shockingly legit.

“Cailín, this is aboveboard. But it’s going to take several hours. With the time difference, it’s already the workday there. Joey’s my driver tonight. I’d like him to take you home, please.”

He’s basically asking. This sounds like a shitshow he’s going to have to deal with. I don’t want to make his night worse. It was good during the times we were alone, but it wasn’t great when we weren’t. If knowing I made it home safely is important to him, then I’ll accept graciously.

“I’d appreciate it.”

We walk to the town car that’s parked at the curb. A man gets out of the driver’s side, but Finn shakes his head. We stop next to the back door as the man gets back into the vehicle.

“The privacy glass will be up when you get in. You can lower it and tell Joey your address. He’ll escort you to your door and wait until he’s certain you’re inside safely. Do you live in an apartment building?”

“Yeah. Condos, but I’m all the way on Staten Island.”

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