Page 51 of The Unraveling

I waste another hour sitting at my desk. My mind isn’t focused enough to write the session notes I need to get done. So I decide to pack up for the day and take my work home with me. I have my own appointment with Dr. Alexander first, but maybe after that I’ll take a bath with some lavender-scented salts to try to clear my mind. A glass of wine while I soak might help, too.

I haven’t even touched the green tea Sarah made before she left. It’s cold, so I nuke it in the microwave and dump it into my travel mug to take with me. As I get to the door, I’m still in the fog that’s surrounded me all day. I’m also balancing an armful of files, my laptop, and my Yeti, and I have to shift it all to one side to dig my office keys from my purse. My nose is down as I swing the door open and walk through—and crash straight into a person.

One by one, the files in my hands start to slip, and I bend forward to catch them. Which causes my tea to tip over. I must not have sealed the lid right, because the plastic pops off and the entire contents of my large travel mug spill, all over the person I’ve crashed into. It happens in a split second.

“Shoot. I’m so sor—” I freeze when I get a look at the handsome face looking down at me.

Gabriel.

He reaches out to steady me as I wobble. “Are you all right?”

I stare. “I, uh, I didn’t see you. What are you doing here?”

“I came to speak to you.” He lifts his sopping-wet dress shirt away from his skin. “That’s some hot stuff you got there.”

I shake my head and snap myself out of it. I’ve just spilled scalding tea on this man. “I’m so sorry. Let me grab you something.”

Gabriel follows me into the office, where I go straight to Sarah’s bottom drawer. It’s packed with ketchup packets, soy sauce, utensils, and wads of napkins from different takeout places. Grabbing a bunch of the napkins, I nervously blot at Gabriel’s shirt. But when I feel the ridges of hard abdomen underneath, I realize I’m being inappropriate and apologize again, handing him the napkins.

He cleans up as best as he can.

“I really am sorry. I’ll pay for your dry cleaning.”

“That’s not necessary.”

“I insist.” I take the wet napkins from his hands and toss them into the garbage. When I turn back around, the room is quiet, and there’s no distraction to focus on anymore. Gabriel waits until our eyes meet to speak.

“Why are you dumping me as a patient?” he asks.

My heart races, and suddenly I feel how warm it is in here. “I, um, I have to apologize about that. We’re too busy to take on any more new patients. I should’ve known that before we started working together.”

Gabriel squints. “Too busy?”

I nod and look away. “I think you’ll really like Dr. Pendleton. He’s a wonderful listener.”

His heavy gaze sears into my skin. “What if I pay you double?”

“Oh, no. This isn’t about money. It really isn’t.”

Gabriel is quiet for way too long. I start to question if he can hear my heart smacking against my rib cage. When he does eventually speak, his voice is low—intimate, almost.

“Meredith?”

My eyes jump to meet his. I hate that I like the way my name sounds, rolling off his tongue in that soft tone.

“You’re the first woman I’ve connected with since my wife died.” He pauses, then adds quickly, “The first person, I mean.”

I swallow.

“The other night after our session, I slept six hours straight. That’s a record since…” He pauses and lets the unspoken words hang thick in the air. “Do you think maybe you could squeeze me in for a few more weeks at least? Let me get a little further along before I make the switch to someone new? I feel like I’m making real progress, and switching right now would only set me back.”

I open my mouth to say no, but the words won’t come out. How could I possibly say no to a patient at an important crossroads?

How could I possibly say no to helping the man I had a hand in destroying?

The answer is I can’t.

So I take a deep breath and force a smile. “Sure. Of course. Give the office a call tomorrow and Sarah will get you on the calendar.”