Page 23 of Love Lies Bleeding

“I’m your only daughter.”

I watch Hank kiss his daughter on the cheek with so much affection, and it makes me think of my Cherry Blossom. After our discussion about books, she’s put some distance between us. She hasn’t been overtly cold with me, just unavailable and I don’t like it.

I was so close to kissing her that night, to throwing caution to the wind and saying fuck it. I don’t want to be her friend, I want to be her everything. I want to consume her, to kiss every inch of her body, and watch her eyes go dark when she comes with my name on her lips.

What stopped me was the thought that more than any of those, I wanted to lie with her in my arms all night. Sex was one thing but I want to protect this girl. I want to be the person who makes her smile, who lets her cry over her father and be herself in every way, and that shit was scary.

“What the fuck’s going on with you?”

I glance up from the black leather couch I’d flopped down on to see Hunter watching me. This den has become our haven, the place we come to when we want to be left alone and just hang out. Hunter has been my best friend since the day we met. I’d gone looking for a fight, the chip on my shoulder so big it was crushing me. I’d seen his wealth and privilege and decided I hated him, but it was never him I hated, it was myself, and still is to some extent. When Hunter had bumped my shoulder on the way to our first class, I’d thrown down with him, causing a fight that had left us both bloody.

We’d both been hauled in front of the Principal, me still spitting fury and anger from every pore. I’d been ready to see my scholarship ripped away, to be thrown out of the prestigious school where I’d never belonged. My future lay before me, leading in only two directions, prison or dead and, in that moment, I’d realized I just didn’t care. Life in the system was worse than I ever imagined, but it was the loneliness for me, the sense of having no place to call home and nobody to give a shit if I lived or died.

Then Hunter had done something I hadn’t expected. He’d taken the blame. He said he’d started the fight when we both knew it was me. My mind drifts back to that day; the day my life changed direction.

“Why the fuck did you do that? I don’t need no fucking charity, rich boy.”

“Fuck you, asshole. I didn’t do it for you.”

“Then why?”

“What the fuck do you care?”

“Because I don’t want no help from the likes of you.”

“Get fucked. You don’t know me.”

“I know you hit like a pussy.”

“Yeah, tell that to your broken nose, pretty boy.”

“I’ve had worse.”

“Then maybe you should learn not to be a cocky cunt.”

“So why did you lie?” I didn’t even know why this was bothering me, but it was. I needed to know, so I could figure out my next move.

“Honestly, I just didn’t want to lose sleep tonight thinking of poor orphan Annie losing her scholarship.”

An involuntary laugh burst out of me at that comment. “You’re a real asshole making fun of an orphan.”

“Yeah, well, like I said, you don’t know me.”

He was right, I didn’t know him, but for some reason, I felt a kinship with this boy. He’d fought me hard but he’d also stood up for me when my future was on the line. “Well, thanks. This place is my ticket out of my shit life.”

“Whatever.”

Hunter turned to leave and I moved to head back to the group home that made a mockery of the word ‘home’.

“Hey, you like hockey?”

I shrugged, not wanting him to see any kind of weakness or give the impression I cared too much when the opposite was true. “Sure, it’s okay.”

A lie, I loved hockey, football, soccer, tennis, all sports, really. Not for the sport but from the sense of team camaraderie that jumped off the screen.

“I have tickets for the game this weekend. Wanna go with me?”

I wanted it more than my next breath, but I held my emotions in check, not trusting this feeling or the hand of friendship Hunter McKenzie was offering. He wasn’t just a rich kid, he was the rich kid. Everyone wanted to be his friend, to say they knew him, and yet he kept to himself.