Page 146 of Becoming Selfish

“Hey,” I cautiously say, not sure how I feel about this friend of Eli’s yet.

“Hi,” Jay says with a smile.

“Don’t say ‘hi,’” Eli interjects from behind me, causing me to laugh and melt into him further. “You can say, ‘hey.’”

As I’d previously assumed, Eli has also picked up on the fact that we always say ‘hi’ to each other, but it’s cute to hear it confirmed. Plus, I like how protective he is of our thing.

“Okay?” Jay says with a questioning look. “Possessive much?”

“You have no idea.” Eli wraps his arms tighter around my shoulders.

Suddenly a loud crash echoes throughout the house. There’s definitely some shattered glass or a broken window in the other room.

“Fuck,” Eli says under his breath, looking in that direction.

“Maddison!” someone calls out.

“Better go, Maddison,” Jay says. “Logan will be fine with me.”

Eli looks from Jay, back to me, completely unconvinced.

“Maddison!” another person shouts.

“Come with me?” Eli asks. I contemplate it for a moment, but to be honest, I feel bold tonight, and I want to get to the root of this Jay thing.

“Go. I’m fine.”

He looks to Jay with a pointed glance. “Look out for her, will you? And don’t be a dick to her,” he adds before kissing my forehead and quickly heading towards the other room.

“So,” Jay begins. “You’re Maddison’s girlfriend,” he says somewhat slowly, trying to see how the words taste coming off his tongue.

“Yes, I am.”

“How long has this thing been going on between you guys?”

“Since the beginning of the school year.” The words leave my mouth before realizing that Eli might not want Jay to know these things.

“You know he’s probably going to be leaving soon, right? He should be getting called up before the end of the year, and I just want you to be prepared.” There’s not an ounce of concern on Jay’s face, it’s all smug.

I don’t like where this conversation is going. If I were sober right now, Jay would probably intimidate me, but I’m drunk, confident Logan at the moment, and I speak what’s on my mind now, apparently.

“You don’t think I know that? I’ve known that since the day we met. Trust me, I’m aware.”

“And you know—”

“I’m just going to stop you there, Jay,” I say, cutting him off. “Trust me. Whatever you’re about to say, I’ve thought about it. I’m not trying to distract him or pull his attention away from hockey, and I’m not going to stop him when he finally gets his shot. You don’t need to worry.”

He lets out a heavy sigh as his self-righteous expression softens. “I’m sure I sound like a jackass, but I’m just looking out for him,” he says with sincerity, his intimidating tactic gone. “I was really close to making it when it all slipped away from me, and I just don’t want the same thing to happen to Maddison. I care about the kid, even if I don’t always show it in the best way.”

“Me too, Jay. We are on the same team. I’m not going to stand in his way. But you know there’s more to him than hockey, right?” I ask with raised brows.

“I know,” he replies quickly, not really thinking about my question.

“Do you, though?” I ask again. “I mean, really, do you?”

Jay stays silent, averting his guilty gaze away from me.

“He wants to make it more than you know,” I tell him. “More than you want it for him. More than anyone wants it for him. But don’t you think it’s got to get old when the only thing people want to talk to him about is hockey? Like he’s some kind of meal ticket? He’s a really good guy, and the only thing people see is the arrogant athlete.”

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