Page 83 of I Love My Mistake

My heart stops beating and my eyes go cold. I straighten up, smoothing my hair self-consciously. I look at the table seeing only an image of Mark and Jessica having sex. Her red hair flying. His arms around her body. His beautiful, warm eyes looking at her… the way they looked at me. My eyes start to tear up and I stand.

“Excuse me.”

Mark stands and tries to touch my arm as I pass him. I throw him a quick look that screams, don’t even think about it. I race out of the bar. As soon as I crash out onto the sidewalk, I gulp for air, feeling the world spinning around me, images of Mark and Jessica banging each other, everywhere. Against that lamppost. Against that window. On this sidewalk. EVERYWHERE.

He bursts out of the door behind me. “Nicole!”

I face him. “Did you shower with her? Did you take her back to your hotel? Did you guys go to Central Park? Oh no, wait… you barely went outside. You were too busy fucking.”

He shakes his head. “Nicole, don’t. Please stop.”

“Oh my God. I can’t believe this is how this went tonight” I cover my face with my hands.

“Hey hey hey. I don’t want you thinking those things! I didn’t shower with her. I swear I didn’t. None of the things we did… ”

Jess bursts out of the door. “So, you moved on, quickly,” she spits at Mark.

Mark stares at her. “Me? You’re already in a relationship!”

I look from one to the other of them. “This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me.”

Mark flips around and reaches out for me.

I jump back. “No! Don’t.” He reels back, hurt by the sharpness of my tongue. I turn to her. “I didn’t know, Jess! This is not a betrayal. It’s not like what happened with David!” She looks at me, not sure what to believe.

“It’s just so weird, Nicole. How did you --”

“I met him through Amber. She was at --”

Mark interrupts us, getting angry. “Stop talking about me like I’m not here!”

Jess rushes to me. I hug her. “Promise me you didn’t know,” she whispers in my hair.

I shake my head, “No! No – ask Amber! Neither of us knew!”

Mark explodes under the hurt and frustration of being on the outside. He can’t believe what he’s seeing. This is so far from what he thought would happen tonight, too. “Wait! Now just wait. This isn’t fair. I didn’t plan this. Do you think I planned this?”

I pull away from Jess and stand next to her. “I hadn’t even thought of that, Mark. Why would you say that?”

Jess mutters, “People usually say what they’ve done. You can only think it if you’ve done it.”

He stares at me, crushed. He looks to Jess. She scowls at him.

“Jessica, don’t look at me like that. This isn’t fair. You dumped me! And we barely even know each other. Why are you acting so jealous?”

Jess announces, wide-eyed, “We were going to go out Friday night! The night you guys met, apparently!”

My head jerks to look at her, stunned.

Mark helplessly shakes his head, his face falling as he sees where this is going. “Don’t do that to her, Jess.”

Jess glares at him. “I’m not doing anything.”

“You didn’t even answer my email for two days! And then you said… you know what you said.”

I throw up both my hands. “This is so crazy!” I turn, rushing away as Jess and Mark argue behind me.

Amber crashes out of the bar. “Josh has Chris hostage! What’s happening???!! NICO!!!”

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