Page 63 of I Love My Mistake

“Don’t look to him! This isn’t oh poor me, she just offended my manhood. This is me telling you the truth so you can stop violating women with your ego, your bad sex and your FACE.” I wipe my hands together. “I’m done. Keep moving. You and your puppy.”

Grant is confused, beyond furious. But I’ve given him nothing but a humiliated leg to stand on. “Bitch.”

In my sweetest voice, I coo, “Awwww. Is that what you named her?”

He flips me off, grunts as he’s pulled awkwardly away in a jerking leap by his dog who's just seen a squirrel and races to catch it. A squirrel! And here I thought that dog was dangerous. My heart is racing. I feel charged, powerful and freaked out, all at once. I’m breathing fast, trying to calm myself.

“That was hot,” Mark says, behind me.

I spin around, eyes round. “What?”

His eyes shine with surprised awe. “As Yoda would say, hot, that was.”

I’m stunned. All of my anger dissipates, wilting under grateful shock. “You think so?”

He shakes his head in disbelief, makes a phew sound, impressed. “Yeah. That was fucking hot.”

I melt. It is in this moment that I realize how important Mark’s opinion is to me. I was so scared he would judge me for so many reasons with what just happened. My heartbeat slamming in my chest was mostly from fear that he would be scared off by any or all of it. And now, looking at him, I’m just plain stunned. I step closer to him, carefully holding out my hand, palm facing him, collecting myself. I still can’t totally believe him. I still feel the need to explain. “Please don’t judge me for dating that jerk. We only had four dates. I was in a bad place. My choices were all screwed up at the time. As soon as I realized he was not a good guy, I ended it.”

Mark nods, listening. “I understand,” but I don’t even hear him say that because I’ve barely come up for air, talking fast.

“It’s just that I couldn’t let him get away with saying that about me. Not in front of you. So now you’ve seen it. That’s my temper. Scary, huh? I know. I got it from my father. It’s so embarrassing and… intimidating, I know. I’m working on it. I’ve gotten sooooooo much better, but…” I stop because he’s smiling at me. “What?”

He gives me a wicked smile, staring at my mouth. “You don’t intimidate me. I said hot… not I’m outta here.”

“You really thought my temper was hot?”

He nods, pushes his hands into his pockets. “I’m covering up a tent here, so um… yeah. Unless it’s ever pointed at me, of course. If that happened, I would have to show you who’s boss.”

My heart skips, and my body tingles. The idea is more than a little exciting. “Really?”

He chuckles, smiling sideways. “Really.” His expression shifts, making it clear he’s about to say something profound. “You want to know something? It’s serious. Are you ready?”

I gulp, bracing myself. “Yes.”

He looks to the ground. “I’ve slept with some bat-shit crazies in my time, too.”

A smile sneaks out of me. He got me again. “You have, huh?”

He nods slowly, like this is big, scary news. “We’re talking restraining orders.”

I’m skeptical and gullible. Because now I don’t know what to believe! “Restraining orders?”

“Hanging from trees outside my window. Heavy-breathing voice messages. Boiled bunnies. The works.” He nods, his eyes laughing, his mouth straight-line somber.

I purse my lips, thinking, Damn, he got me again! “Men probably shouldn’t own bunnies.”

He shrugs, says in all seriousness, “We do it just to see who the real nutcases are. Saves us a lot in alimony. A few bunnies sacrificed for the greater cause.”

I laugh. “That’s sick.”

He covers his heart with his hand. “The trick is you don’t name them. That way you don’t get attached.”

“The bunnies or the women?”

“The women.”

I lean up and kiss him. “Thank you.”

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