Page 3 of Reaching Hearts

Chapter Two

Annie

Me: Blinking with incomprehension.

The change of subject was jarring and it takes a moment for me to understand. Looking down at my bag, I stretch it open to discover a large stack of bills inside. “What’s this?”

His eyes darken and his voice is somber as he explains, “It’s the money you threw at him. We picked it up from the floor.”

“Oh,” I whisper, looking back at the crisp, neatly stacked currency, the perfect rubber band.

“We took the liberty of exchanging the bills for new ones. The ones we recovered were…not pretty.”

Flashing before me is Brendan’s chest wound held shut only by my red fingers, the bloodstained money splayed on the ground around us. It’s so clear it’s as if it’s happening now. The urge to see him alive and well and talk to him when he regains consciousness, is so strong that I feel sick.

“Thank you,” I whisper. “That was very kind of you. What’s your name, sir?”

His lips form an uncomfortable line as he looks at me. He can see I’m fighting the vision. He’s seen people like me before. “Sergeant Lewis.” He reaches out and shakes my hand. “You need some sleep, Ms. O’Brien.”

Nodding, I whisper, “I know. I um…have to clean up first. Anyway, I can’t get my brain to stop racing so this will help. I need to do this.”

He nods somberly. “Have a good day.”

Everyone says goodbye and just as he’s about to walk out of view, he turns. “You’re new to the area, right?”

I nod. “Just opened up six months ago.”

His heads shakes. “Damn shame this happened.”

I shrug and one corner of my mouth turns up as I say with comic sarcasm, “I wanted to open with a bang?”

“Keep that sense of humor.” He points at me, gives one last wave to the room, and leaves.

I can’t stop staring at the money. The night’s images are on shuffle, just like Taryn’s playlist, but so much louder—horrible and wonderful moments skewed out of order, each as intense as the last.

“That was really nice of them to change the money out,” Taryn says, quietly, pulling her soft, hazelnut brown hair into a ponytail so she can work.

Laura mutters while removing her bracelets and placing them on the bar, “I guess it must have been pretty bad for them to do that.”

I nod and say, without feeling, “Yeah.”

Manny wrings excess water from a bar towel until it's almost dry. “Makes me want to like cops. Almost.”

“If 911 didn’t exist, Brendan would be dead.”

Taryn reaches over and picks up her pint glass. “Let’s toast to cops.”

We all raise our glasses up and touch them together. Death Cab For Cutie’s Follow You Into The Dark plays in the background and while I love them on a normal day, no thank you. “Can we change this?”

“Something more cheerful,” Manny mumbles.

“Sorry. Got it.” Taryn slides off her barstool and jogs over and puts on Florence and The Machine’s Shake It Off. She calls over with a wink, “Better?”

Mutual agreement all around. Laura touches my back. “You sit for a little while.”

I look at her and she repeats it. I hadn’t heard her. She guides me to a bar stool and I let her, like I’m one of her children. She puts the pint glass in my hands and I cling to it. I feel so numb. The images have stopped. My mind’s gone blank. It’s like someone emptied it. The three of them clean around me, but I’m not even here. All sense of space and time is lost to me as I stare ahead at nothing.

The muffled sound of a phone ringing from my bag startles me more than it should. I don’t know how much time has passed. Christiano’s name is on the screen and his photo kills me even though I’ve seen it hundreds of times. It’s of him making omelets, shirtless, his hair disheveled from a morning fuck we’d had before our friends were to arrive. He’d flipped the spatula with extra zing, the omelets perfect. I’d tossed his shirt to him. Put this on or Sophia won’t be able to focus on her meal. He’d winked at me. But will you? Knowing the table is where I’ll take you, tonight? I’d grinned. I wish they weren’t on their way now. Before he’d plated the meal, I’d run to grab my phone so I could take this picture. I want to remember this moment, baby. Then I froze time forever with the miraculous push of a tiny, magical button.