Page 9 of Tangling Hearts

Chapter Six

Annie

If anyone has binoculars, I hope they’re taking notes.

We make love in front of the incredible view with me on top of him, the blanket around my waist. Our eyes stay on each other even when the climax takes us over, rushing through us at the exact same, intoxicating time. “We have to start using condoms,” he says, incredulous when we realize that once again, we forgot.

“Oh my God!” I climb off him and land a kiss on his lips before jumping off his bed. “I’ll remember next time, I promise!” I walk into the bathroom, clean up, and come back with a warmed, damp washcloth to clean him off with. “Your bathroom is as big as my living room.”

Lying on his back, naked except for the gauze square on his ribs, he chuckles and watches me climb onto the bed to slowly and sensually clean him off, taking extra care. “That feels so good.” He closes his eyes, his whole body spent, relaxed and gorgeous.

I get up to put the washcloth away again, and from behind me, I hear him say, “Your ass is shaped like a cello. I wanted to tell you earlier. It’s so beautiful.”

I smile over my shoulder. “You like it?”

“I like everything about you.” He closes his eyes, a small smile rested on his lips.

My feet float me into the bathroom, a few inches off the floor, and I shut the door quietly, but quickly. At my reflection, I stare, trying to understand if I heard what I think I just heard. It feels like I could cry, like it’s not real… but why? What part of me thinks I don’t deserve to have these feelings? To be told I’m beautiful by the man I’ve loved since I’ve known him. There is a part of me that can’t take this in, and that part wants to sob and crawl into a corner. It’s the part of me that knows I need to tell him.

“Brendan, we met before. We didn’t get along. I touched your lips. You yelled at me. I yelled at you. You said you wanted to stay far away from me. I called you an idiot. You chased me into the street. Why did you do that, by the way?” After whispering these things to myself, I look to the closed door and decide now is the time. With my heart pounding, I walk to put my hand on the doorknob and open it. I pause. My head feels woozy and my hands are clammy, but I know I have to do it now. I can’t live with knowing I have a secret from him, when I can plainly see that we are falling in love. For real. Not just a schoolgirl’s crush. Really falling in love… together.

Cracking open the door, I try to inhale, but I can’t breathe. Propelled solely by will power, I step into his bedroom, naked and getting ready to bare my soul, too. I step onto the softness of the rug, but he doesn’t lift his head to smile. Walking closer, I hear a light snore coming from his parted lips. I stand by the bed and gaze at his sleeping face, knowing I can’t wake him like the nurses did. He needs to sleep through the night. He needs to heal. I can’t be selfish and upset him tonight after all he’s been through.

My confession can wait. I know I’ll tell him. There’s no longer any question. I will just wait until he’s better, and when the time is right.

Climbing into the bed, I pull up the blankets over both of us, tucking him in and lying beside him with enough space for his wounded body to be safe from sleeping twists and turns. I turn on my side and slide my hand under my head to watch him sleep, see his chest rise and fall easily.

I stayed like this for awhile and fell asleep against my will, just to wake around two o’clock and find that sometime in those hours, his hand found mine. I unweave our fingers to make a trip to the bathroom, being quiet and letting myself live between dream-world and reality, never fully waking up. Climbing back into bed, I weave my fingers into his again. He gives mine a squeeze from his subconscious and I fall back asleep, happy.

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