Page 87 of Sovereign Oaths

“I’m so sorry.” He got up to sit on the bed, pulling me onto his lap.

Cruz and Javi joined us, all of them reaching out to touch me. Cruz gripped my foot, stroking his thumb over my ankle. Marco took my hand, and Javi rubbed my leg, just above my knee.

All of us together—my heart and mind accepted we were safe and whole—made me break.

Anguish.

Terror.

Panic.

Sorrow.

It all came pouring out of me as I sobbed.

Everyone, even badass assassins, had a breaking point. I reached mine.

They didn’t ask questions. They didn’t whisper reassurances.

I shattered, and they let me, giving me peace and space.

The sky was dark when I was too weak or tired to continue.

My head ached, and my eyes burned.

They stayed the entire time, but now that I’d gone quiet, Javi stood. He returned a moment later with a bottle of water and some pills.

I took them before settling back against Derek.

“I can’t remember ever feeling that kind of fear,” I finally admitted. “I’ve been in similar situations, and I’ve been trained on how to get out of much worse, but I’ve never felt so helpless until today.”

“Why?” Cruz asked.

“I let my guard down. I put my trust in people who didn’t deserve it.”

Derek tensed under me, and I put my hand on his thigh.

“Not you. Alessio. His men. I thought being with Ama made me safe. That his men would never betray her.” I shook my head, thankful they weren’t jumping in with reassurances.“Brazzi did this. He’s the one ruining everything. He has since the beginning.”

“Em, he’s––” Marco started, but I stared him down.

Javi straightened. “You love him. Dias.”

Was that the only possible explanation to him? Couldn’t he look beyond that?

“No, Javi. I don’t.”

“You told him you did,” Marco reminded me.

“I’ve said a lot of bullshit to stay alive. I’ll say just about anything to survive.”

“Anything?” Cruz asked quietly.

I turned to him, sensing his doubt and wanting to shake him. “To get through a mission? Yes. To you guys? You should all know better.”

“He loves you.” Derek kissed my hair. “His feelings are real.”

“I know.” I didn’t bother arguing or downplaying it. “I don’t see him as the villain either. At least not the only one.”

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