Page 58 of When I Fall In Love

I study his face. Hunter has been holding this together for years. He’s been holding his family together in the cup of his hands, trying to protect them from life’s onslaughts as if they were little yellow chicks. Problem is, no matter how light the weight you hold up, eventually it becomes heavy.

“I’d take you on a tour of the whole factory, but that would involve suiting up and sterilizing and so on—”

“It’s okay. I’ve seen more than enough.”

“Churning ice cream at home is very different. Even romantic.” He turns away from the window with a wry smile. “I hoped you wouldn’t find this boring.”

I reach out for him. “It’s not boring, Hunter, it’s amazing and to be honest… it’s caught me off guard.”

“Little old Ashleigh Lake, hmm?” he says with a soft smile. “Lots going on here if you care to look.”

And I’ve been looking. The whole weekend, everything we’ve been doing has been more than a return to the past. It was showing me a future. A future I can’t possibly sign up for. I’ve put too much into my work in San Francisco to walk away now… or? Sasha. She can’t be the only one. I don’t even know where to begin and haven’t had enough time to think. “Can we go pick up my rental at Bill and May’s? I need to drop it off at the airport when I leave.”

“Sure thing.” He doesn’t take my hand this time as we walk out of the building, but holds the truck door for me as I clamber in.

We drive in silence to Brodie Farm and as we head down the slope toward the farmhouse, I draw in a slow breath. The view from up here is gorgeous at any time of year, but right now, it is spectacular. My rental stands right where I left it on Thursday night. Bill’s truck is there but May’s car isn’t.

“Bill and May are home?” Maybe now would be a good time to say goodbye. I won’t be able to stomach a long goodbye as it is.

“Doesn’t look like it. I wonder where they are.”

We get out of the truck and I watch as Hunter walks up to the porch to knock. For a moment he looks confused, then turns away and walks back over the lawn. “Nobody’s at home.”

“It’s probably just past three o’clock,” I say, recalling the time from the car’s dashboard. “Maybe Bill is at the milking parlor?” It’s been weird to be without the constant companionship of a phone and all those apps. It’s been liberating, to be honest, and for the first time in a very long time, my focus has been solely in the moment.

“Let’s head home. Bill and May might have gone to see Rachel. She’s been doing an event management course with some hotel group this past week in Hawaii and came back today as far as I know.”

“I can’t believe both the Brodie girls are spreading their wings and going places.”

“They sure are, but they’ll come back home. This place is a bit like that.” He stares at me over the roof of my rental car and I have to look away. Yes, the Brodies and Logans stick together because that’s who they are.

As I follow Hunter back to his place, all I can think of is that the weak roots I had in Ashleigh Lake got torn to shreds when we got plucked away years ago. I’m no Brodie or Logan with a long history here. There is no reason for me to come back to Ashleigh Lake. Except for Hunter.

This weekend has been all fun and games, but he hasn’t spoken a word about wanting more. Maybe that’s for the best, because I don’t know how I’ll be able to give him more than what we just had—a frantic weekend of catching up and indulging.

29

HUNTER

When we get home, Beth drives down to the cottage to park and I go inside my house alone. It’s so quiet, it’s almost eerie. With her not here, my empty existence is full in my face, mocking me. Owning my own company, technically being rich on paper and able to afford whatever my cousins and brothers need, has been enough for years. I plan to look after Bill and May once they retire, but I could never give them back everything they’ve been for us and everything they’ve given me and my brothers since that moment May hugged me close that day so long ago now.

Despite all I’ve achieved, I’m one of the loneliest people in the world.

I walk over to the kitchen and pick a pod to make some coffee. Anything to keep busy as I wait for her to come back. One last night. That’s all we have, unless I brace myself and ask her for a long-distance relationship. We haven’t spoken as such about where this thing between us might go, but I don’t expect Beth to give up her life in San Francisco to be with me. If things evolve—if we can actually make it work—then one of us will have to bow to the other. Especially if we want to start a family.

At the thought, my stomach contracts with longing and my heartbeat spikes.

This weekend was many things—showing Beth life in Ashleigh Lake, making her fall in love again with a place she could rightly hate. But at some point, between every paddle stroke and every step we took on the trail this morning, the question that came up in my mind time and again was if I would be able to leave everything behind and move to San Francisco. And finally be there with her as I promised so long ago to be.

It’s too soon to say. For all I know, Beth is only into us for now. Once she’s back at work and her real life, this time in Ashleigh Lake could become a mere blip, and I’ll have to make the decision to finally move on.

There’s a knock on the glass door at my deck and I walk over to open up for Beth just as a car comes screeching up my driveway and brakes almost on top of the front door. “Holy hell,” I mutter as I unlock the door for Beth. “Someone else is at the front door.”

As Beth steps inside, we both glance at the front door to see Rachel scramble out of her car, clearly agitated.

I stride over to open for her, and a spark of unease rides down my back. Rachel never looks like this.

“Hunter,” she says as soon as the door swings open. “Where the hell have you been?” She gulps down a breath. “I’ve been trying to get hold of you for hours. I’ve been—we’ve been—freaking out!”