Page 24 of What I Should Have Done

I gulped down oxygen as Bernie shook his head. “Way to freak out the newbie.” He shot a glare at Mikey, but that ever present hint of humor raked behind his gaze.

“I’m not—”

“What in the hell are you three doing out here?” Colonel Duke’s voice drowned out my own words. All of us turned our heads to look at the very man walking our way.

“Sir?” Bernie questioned, his casualness immediately being masked by the same intensity that covered Mikey’s face.

“I’m asking why you shitheads aren’t grabbing some sleep. I don’t know when the next intel will come in and you’ll be needed. You’ve been back long enough that I doubt there’s much adrenaline left, so why are you not resting before I decide you need to train or head out?” he explained, stopping in front of us and crossing his arms. “I caught the other half of your team passed out in the chow hall and hoped you were smarter than them.”

“Just on our way there right now, Colonel,” Mikey responded without missing a beat.

“I damn sure hope so.” He lifted an accusatory brow.

And if those words had never been spoken, I doubted I would’ve even considered sleep. There had been something roaring through my body hiding any hint of exhaustion, as if it didn’t exist at all.

Until now.

Like those mortars that crashed into the building earlier, I nearly collapsed to the ground in a heap of limbs and fatigue.

“I need your team ready at a moment’s notice, so go,” the colonel emphasized.

My eyelids blinked slowly, heavily. Even Mikey and Bernie seemed to have flipped a switch in their own bodies as their shoulders drooped.

Rest, that sounded really nice…

Tracking back along the pathway Bernie had dragged me across earlier felt never ending. My feet barely moved, and neither of my companions talked as we shuffled back to our tent. How long had we been up for anyway? Over forty plus hours, at least.

And the others passing out in the chow hall explained why Mikey and I had ended up alone for so long. Bernie must have been returning to sleep when he walked in on what had happened.

It all made sense. What didn’t make sense was how I’d managed to go so long with a clear head. Not enough caffeine in the world could’ve provided the adrenaline-fueled clarity that I’d existed in for days.

Mikey was right. Lifting my blurry gaze to the man walking silently beside me, it made sense. Training was nothing like what we’d just experienced, and fear coursed thick through the sludge of weariness.

Fear that the moment I closed my eyes, I’d dream of nothing but the fact that I’d delivered death to three people today.

Targets. Three targets.

Three…

Targets…?

Chapter 9

MIKEY

The sounds of the desert at night were unfamiliar, yet all the same, comforting. More so than anything back at home. Through slits, I roused from my sleep and scanned my surroundings. The steady hum of sleeping men that I called family surrounded me, filling my body with a sense of fulfillment.

And the insane urge to pee was mixed in there, too. Better yet, I actually had access to a latrine right now and not just some random tumbleweed or a literal zip and go.

Sitting up silently, I slid out from the blanket and froze. Bernie’s green eyes were staring at me. “Where are you going?” he whispered.

“To take a piss. Why?” I questioned in response, remaining still.

“Crow’s gone.”

Glancing over at the bedroll where she was supposed to be asleep, I found it empty. Returning my attention to Bernie, I nodded and rose to my feet. “She’s probably peeing, too, but I’ll make sure she’s not gone and done something stupid.”

Bernie nodded once and then closed his eyes. Creeping out of the tent, the chill of the desert at night sent a shiver down my spine. Padding across cracked dirt normally crowded with other soldiers, a few assigned to patrol duty passed on their rounds, and while a few muted conversations lifted into the air, it was such a strange change from the usual daytime chatter.

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