Page 60 of Since Day One

“Yeah?” She paused, noticing the look on my face. “Did you not know?”

I shook my head. “Gunnar said he grew up here.”

“Well, they both did, mostly,” she replied, watching me as I looked back at Gunnar. “They were seven and eight when they came to live with Jack and Katherine, their first actual foster family since Gunnar refused to go without Ruger and wouldn’t let anyone take Ruger without him.”

Gunnar glanced at me and briefly winked before returning to his conversation with his brother. I wasn’t even sure what to think or say as Jesse stood beside me. We spent four days in that cabin together; I told him everything, including my darkest secret that no other soul knew, and he hadn’t bothered to mention Emily, or now this, to me.

“Wow, I really thought you knew. You and Gunnar seemed to be getting really close, even before the whole snowed-in situation happened,” Jesse said as I stared at someone who was slowly becoming a stranger right in front of me.

“I guess we aren’t as close as I thought we were,” I answered, getting tired of this roller coaster of emotions, feeling numb once more. How selfish of me to feel this way over something that was probably hard for him to process, but how could he think it was fair to learn about what happened to me and not say anything at all about his situation?

“Were Jack and Katherine unable to have children?” I asked, wondering why they fostered and then adopted.

“They tried for years but it never happened.” She watched her husband.

“And their biological parents?” I asked, and Jesse sighed.

“That’s something I should let Gunnar share with you. All of this should’ve been something he told you, but I really thought you knew,” she said, and I glanced at her. So elegant, so beautiful. So everything I wasn’t—pronounced cheekbones, a slender face, style, and feminine beauty.

“It really is okay,” I answered with a smile, and she grinned.

“I hope so. Because I like you, and really hope Gunnar doesn’t screw this up.”

I blushed and then quickly tried to cover it with my hands. “I’m sorry. Screw what up?”

Jesse clicked her tongue. “I may not know all this cowboy stuff, but I do know love, and you two are not just friends. Gunnar is attached to you in a way I’ve never seen him attached to anyone. He looks at you the way Ruger looks at me.”

“It’s just because I can keep up with him in this horse stuff. I train reining horses in Texas,” I explained, trying to play it off, and she shook her head, rolling her eyes.

“I also happened to wake up in the middle of the night, and happened to glance out my window, which gives me a perfect view of the road, and saw two people sneaking into the lodge—together.” She blinked accusingly at me. “Oh, and then there was Emily today. Ruger may be oblivious, but honey, I know jealousy when I see it.”

“Please don’t tell Ruger. Or anyone. I—“

She giggled, cutting me off. “Your secret is safe with me. For now.”

We both looked back at the two brothers, my heart torn in different directions as they finally began walking our way. He’d hidden the adoption from me, but there had also been no obligation to tell me. Yet I confessed something so deep it felt like a small betrayal that he hadn’t bothered to share that with me.

“So, the rodeo isn’t until next weekend,” Ruger said, approaching his wife and giving her a quick kiss on the lips. I slid Gunnar’s plate toward him but didn’t look directly at him.

“That’s a wonderful idea. Now you have time to advertise and not stress when we go to your cousin’s play this weekend,” Jesse answered, smiling proudly at her husband. Gunnar stepped closer to me, but I still refused to look at him. Was I being petty? I wasn’t sure and wished I had someone I could ask, but the one person who might potentially be able to give me advice was occupied with her husband. Maybe I could call Sally? I needed to let Kurt know what I discovered about Emily sabotaging my cinch, but Sally would have good advice about this more personal matter.

Jesse grabbed Ruger’s wrist and pulled him away. He followed like a puppy on a leash. I turned around and slid open the glass doors, walking out onto the patio without bothering to see if Gunnar was following. The fire was low and there was no one out here as a small amount of snow had begun to fall again. Not even the hands wanted to eat outside as I plopped myself in a chair close to the tiny, flickering flames.

Gunnar slid the door closed behind him and sat down in a chair beside me as I shoveled some potatoes into my mouth. “Is something wrong?” he asked, but I continued to ignore him, blaming it on the full mouth. I needed time to think, to make sure I handled this maturely. Part of me felt like I was being petty—everyone opened up on their own time—but the other part of me felt extremely hurt.

“Willow? Is this still about Emily?” Gunnar asked as my food was nearly gone. I stared at the fire, trying to sort out what was in my head. I was tired of being angry all the time and feeling hurt. There was only a limited amount of time that Gunnar and I got to share anyway. Letting us waste some of it by me being mad over something he hadn’t shared yet again was ridiculous.

“Jesse is very nice and pretty,” I finally said between bites, and Gunnar furrowed his brows.

“Yes she is?” he questioned, watching me as I gave myself another moment to come to the mature decision and prayed that it wasn’t the wrong one.

“She has a very nice taste in fashion,” I continued as Gunnar became more and more confused.

“I guess?” he muttered.

“She told me you’re adopted,” I finally blurted, and Gunnar choked on the food he was eating. Coughing, spluttering, he pounded against his chest as I finally looked at him. “Sorry,” I quickly added.

Gunnar held up a finger, asking for my patience as he found a way to dislodge the food that was stuck in his throat. He lifted the cup of water to his lips, downing several long swigs before finally breathing out in relief.

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