Page 26 of Invidia

I regretted not bothering to learn her name, but I’d never paid attention to any of the Hunters who’d moved here except for Tallulah.

Were we even equipped to care for a sick Hunter? What did Shade healers know about healing humans?

For a brief moment, time itself seemed to stop as Tallulah rushed past me and into the room, the other ex-Hunter who lived in Elverston House following close behind. My chest felt tight at the sensation of being so close to Tallulah and yet so far away. She hadn’t even seen me.

What if she forgot about me? It was only a matter of time, I supposed. The idea was agony.

“You did good,” Verner said gruffly, startling me out of my reverie. I hadn’t even noticed him arrive. “Where was she?”

“Right outside the portal. There was no movement from the portals on the human side, though, and no Shade with her. It was only luck that I found her,” I added, slightly shamefaced. “She hadn’t been there a few minutes earlier.”

Verner frowned—an odd look on the usually peaceful Shade. He’d never been afraid to walk into my general vicinity and speak to me, though I wouldn’t say we were friendly.

“The whole situation is strange. Are you up for relaying these developments to the king? He’s at the trial…” Verner trailed off with a grimace.

“Of course,” I agreed, taking Verner by surprise. It was pretty well known among the Guard that I didn’t do anything outside of monitoring the in-between. I didn’t usually have to.

But the idea that Tallulah would walk out of that room, look right at me and not acknowledge me at all was frankly terrifying. My already-fragile ego wouldn’t be able to stand that blow.

I’d rather deal with the horrified looks and uncomfortable avoidance of every Shade at the realm who was attending the trial than that.

“Are you sure?”

“Absolutely.” I was already jogging away. Even with my limited social interactions, I’d heard about this sham of a trial, and it would definitely need to go on pause now.

Unfortunately, it seemed that the Elders didn’t agree. My message was passed on by the guard at the door, but I wasn’t even allowed to set foot in the room. The Curia was off-limits to a Shade like myself.

I wandered back through the empty halls, feeling oddly deflated. It wasn’t like I cared about things like politics or the running of the realm, anyway. I just stayed in my self-imposed prison, doing my job, and ignoring the fact that I was a malformed pariah to the best of my ability.

The distressed scent of the ex-Hunters reached me in the halls, and I picked up my pace, jogging to meet them, to see if there was anything I could do to help.

It was a whole contingency of them, but I only had eyes for Tallulah. And this time, she was looking right back. In the muddle of smells and emotions, I couldn’t tell what she was feeling, but her blue eyes were plenty expressive, even without a scent to draw on.

She was sad. Tallulah looked at me and felt sad.

That idea was intolerable.

How had this all gone so terribly wrong?

“This is Evrin,” Tallulah murmured, making introductions for the benefit of the other ex-Hunters. They didn’t respond to my name with any indication of familiarity, which was what I’d expected, but it still stung. “He was the one who found you in the in-between. You were right outside the portal, you know. So close.”

Fuck me, her voice was as rich and decadent as the sweetest syrup. If I closed my eyes, I could have sworn that I felt it dripping down my throat.

But I doubted anyone would have appreciated me bringing that up right now. So instead, I filled them in on the situation at the Curia, and stood aside as they rushed in, unobstructed by even the Elders’ most loyal guards, because here were people who mattered.

They were the voices who would mingle with the royal family’s, and shape the shadow realm for decades, maybe even centuries, to come. Even the ones who didn’t seem to relish the role of policy-shaping diplomats had the power to change everything, simply by virtue of who and what they were. I’d be lying to myself if I pretended I wasn’t at least a little envious of having that much sway.

Rather than leaving, which would have been the sensible thing to do, I headed for the elegant lounge bar on the upper floors that overlooked the Pit—a popular drinking spot for sociopaths who enjoyed overseeing the suffering of others. It was a favorite haunt for the most morally depraved members of the Guard—the ones the captain hadn’t weeded out yet—and I usually avoided it, but I couldn’t quite face the idea of leaving yet. I wanted to at least be close to Tallulah physically, if nothing else.

“Evrin!” Roan called out the moment I stepped foot in the dimly lit, glossy bar. “What brings you here?”

I did my best to hide my grimace as I crossed the room to meet my brother, carefully keeping my distance as I greeted him. He knew that my lack of horns wasn’t some type of contagion, but the few other Shades sprinkled around the bar might not, and Roan had a reputation to protect. I was surprised he was speaking to me at all—perhaps he was deeper in his cups than I’d initially thought.

“I was nearby. Thought I’d get a drink. It’s been a long day.”

“I’m not surprised,” Roan said with a booming laugh. “Given where you choose to work. Unless you’ve changed stations?” he added hopefully.

“Still in the in-between.”