Page 1 of Invidia

Chapter 1

Being nice was exhausting.

My cheeks hurt from smiling, my heels were pinching my toes, and I’d been ready to leave this ball at least an hour ago, but I didn’t want to look rude by making an early escape when clearly, this whole thing had been put on for the benefit of myself and the other single Hunters—former Hunters?—who’d moved here to the shadow realm.

It suited some of our personalities better than others.

Verity laughed loudly, lounging elegantly in her chair, surrounded by admirers and holding out her goblet for a refill. Striving to emulate her bright, relaxed demeanor, I batted my eyelashes and smiled coyly at the Shade offering to top up my own wine, wondering if I was pulling off effortless grace the way Verity was.

Fake it ’til you make it. Fake it ’til you make it.

“It seems a shame to see you dressed in shadows,” a Shade next to me murmured, their claw drifting over the top of the shadow dress Phileas had formed for me. “When you’re such a vision in color. You always wear such beautiful garments.”

“Thank you,” I said earnestly, grateful for both the compliment and a chance to talk about something that I was actually familiar with. “I make them myself. I love to sew.”

“You make them yourself?” he asked, sounding suitably impressed, and I puffed up slightly in my seat. I was wearing a gorgeous strapless emerald green number beneath the shadows, which I was hoping I’d get a chance to show off at some point to make the suffering the boning in the bodice was causing me worthwhile. “Where did you learn such a skill?”

“It was something my grandmother taught me.” The tension eased out of my stiff neck and shoulders ever so slightly as we chatted about it, the conversation leading me back to the few fond memories I had of visiting my grandparents’ grand home when I was young.

Eventually, the chat petered out, through no fault of the Shade valiantly trying to flirt with me. I was overstimulated, overtired, and floundering in my attempts to sound like the sultry, funny, personable ex-Hunter everyone seemed to assume I was.

I didn’t know if I was good at lying to them or lying to myself that my scent didn’t give away any hint of discomfort. Maybe it was a little of both.

“Would you excuse me for a moment?” I said with my most sunniest of smiles, standing up and making my way through the crowded room, my heels clicking against the stone floor with every step. Someone had thrown open a usually shut side door, letting some air into the stuffy room and allowing guests to access the overgrown circular courtyard in the center of the spiral-shaped palace.

Perhaps because it was so overgrown—and a little creepy—the courtyard was blessedly empty, and only just illuminated enough to prevent Shades from shadow walking into it. Or maybe it was the faint chill in the air, keeping everyone inside near the warm glow of the open flames dotted around the dining hall in towering metal torches.

The shadows I’d been wearing vanished the moment I moved out of whatever the magical distance was between myself and Phileas, and even though I’d wanted to show off my dress, I suddenly felt overexposed in the night air with my shoulders and arms on display.

At least there was no one to see me out here. I made my way farther into the overgrowth, letting the sounds of the ball grow muted behind me. I’d always liked the dark. I let it wrap around me, hiding my tomato-red cheeks and ostentatious dress.

You’re being ridiculous, the nagging voice in the back of my head reminded me. This event is for the ex-Hunters. It’s for you. They’ve made an effort, you need to do the same. You’re supposed to be getting to know the Shades, you’re supposed to be making connections. Maybe even finding The One.

But what if I didn’t find The One? What would The One even look like? I didn’t even know what I was looking for. I didn’t understand the culture, or the history, or the seemingly rigid class structure that appeared to go unexamined. I was intrigued by Shade features—and I found them beautiful in an aesthetic sense—but I’d never fantasized about monster fucking the way some of the others who’d moved here had. I didn’t dislike the physical differences between us, but I couldn’t pretend I wasn’t intimidated by them.

I definitely hadn’t had an instant belly-fluttering-panties-soaking reaction to anyone yet. And what if I never did? What if I couldn’t feel attraction to anyone? Honestly, I hadn’t had a great track record of it in the human realm either. I’d assumed the worst of every man who’d ever so much as glanced at me.

None of this is going to improve by you hiding out here all alone, I told myself sternly. You need to put yourself out there. Flirt more. See if a connection develops.

There was a circular waist-height stone wall in the center of the courtyard, with overgrown, haphazard bushes planted at even intervals, almost hiding the wall completely.

I slipped my feet out of my heels, almost moaning at the cool sensation of smooth stone under my aching feet, and carefully lowered myself to the ground, trying not to snag my outfit as I wriggled back between two of the bushes to sit against the wall. The dress was a formfitting number and not the most comfortable to curl up in, but I was cold enough that it was worth the extra effort to wrap my arms around my knees.

It wasn’t ideal—I’d have preferred somewhere a little more confined and a whole lot warmer to curl up and talk myself down, but beggars couldn’t be choosers.

Five minutes. I just needed five minutes to collect myself, and then I’d head back inside and be more charming and more flirty and more vivacious. But for right now, I didn’t need my scent broadcasting that I wasn’t as confident as I appeared.

“Sorry to interrupt, but should you be out here?” a low, soothing voice asked, making me startle so hard that if the snagging branches hadn’t been in the way, I would have cracked my head on the stone wall.

I clutched my chest like I could physically grab my heart and stop it from beating at such an alarming rate, squinting through the leaves and scanning what I could see of the courtyard in front of me.

“Who are you? Where are you?” I winced a little at my own bluntness. Apparently, my goal for this evening was to make as many poor first impressions as possible. Then again, I was already sitting in a bush. What were a few unpolished words at this point?

“On your left.”

I startled, realizing the voice was coming from beside me. Peering through the leafy charcoal-colored bush I was sitting by, I found a pair of glowing navy eyes staring right back at me. To my surprise, I didn’t immediately shriek and run away, which is probably what a sensible person would have done at finding a pair of glowing monster eyes staring intently at them through a bush.

Maybe I was acclimatizing to life in the shadow realm better than I thought.

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