Page 78 of Undoing

“It’s our house. And I’m used to being down here. But your pillow stays with me,” Cass teased. She had to do something to lessen the tension in the room.

Relief washed over Rebecca, and she smiled. “Fair enough. Thank you for understanding.”

“Always.” Cass sat back, propping her socked feet up on the coffee table. “Do you wanna talk about what changed about you being here? Why now? I mean, I hope that part of the decision was because you trust me.”

“Oh, absolutely. That’s the biggest reason I thought I could actually do this. Spending time with you has helped me see what kind of person you are and how you are with me.” Rebecca tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “As for what changed,” Rebecca relaxed next to Cass, kicking her shoes off and bringing her feet up under her on the couch. “I get that I’m supposed to be taking it easy because of the surgery. But I was beginning to feel more… stagnant instead of relaxed. Please don’t get me wrong, I love my aunt. Living with her wasn’t the problem. It’s just…” There was a slight pause while Rebecca found her words. “My brain wasn’t relaxing. It kept trying to remember things it couldn’t remember.”

Rebecca frowned. She had tried to reiterate Aunt Wills’s comment about not knowing what she was supposed to remember, but it came out even more confusing. “That made a lot more sense in my head.”

Cass chuckled. She had been so preoccupied with Rebecca casually taking off her shoes and relaxing that she almost missed the very un-Rebecca-like explanation. Normally, Rebecca was capable of expressing herself eloquently, leaving the incoherent stuff to Cass. Oddly enough, Cass found it refreshing.

“Nah, I get exactly what you’re trying to say.”

“You do?”

“Yep.” Cass changed her position, so she was facing Rebecca. God, she’s beautiful. “It’s like someone asking me to paint the scenery in the Canary Islands, yeah? But I’ve never been there, so I don’t know what it looks like.” She shrugged. “Still, I’m going to paint it how I believe it looks there, and whatever I come up with may be fine, but it wouldn’t really be the Canary Islands, right?”

Rebecca tapped Cass’s arm with excitement. “That’s exactly it! Now that I’m here, my brain is able to fill in some blanks. At least, that’s the hope.” She looked around, taking in every little detail she could. Then, her eyes landed on the mermaid mural. How the hell had she missed that when she walked in?

Cass watched silently as Rebecca got up and walked straight to the mural. When Rebecca touched the mermaid’s face, Cass’s gaze fell on Rebecca’s hand. The nails were unpainted and slightly longer than usual, but those slender yet strong fingers never failed to get Cass’s blood pumping. Instead of squirming in her seat, she got up and joined Rebecca.

“You did this?” Rebecca asked quietly when Cass came up beside her.

“Yeah.” Now, Cass was the one experiencing the deja vu.

“It’s… me.” Rebecca stared at the image. It was most certainly her, yet it was different. Cass saw her this way: beautiful, sensual, free. Was that how she was when she was with Cass?

“It is.” Cass turned and leaned against the mural. She had been staring at the mural every night, but now Rebecca was actually standing in front of her. While she could stare all night, Cass didn’t think Rebecca would enjoy that. “So, uh, it’s too early for bed. Unless you’re tired.”

“Not even a little,” Rebecca grinned.

“Good,” Cass couldn’t help but return the smile. “I could give you a tour of the place and get you settled in upstairs. Then, maybe, we could DoorDash some dinner and sorta veg out on the couch and talk.”

“DoorDash?”

Stuck in 2001, you dolt. “Oh, right. Um, food delivery.” Cass brought out her phone to bring up the app. “See? You browse a ton of different restaurants, and they bring you food. Here’s Ellie’s. But we can get anything you’re in the mood for.”

“Ellie’s sound great. Can I…?” Rebecca gestured at Cass’s phone.

“Hmm? Oh, uh, yeah.” She swiped out of the app and handed Rebecca her iPhone. If Rebecca were stuck in 2001, she wouldn’t have had one.

“I think this is what Aunt Wills has. I remember my last cell phone. It didn’t look anything like this.” Rebecca laughed, but it wasn’t a happy sound. “It was a Nokia, I believe. It was a tiny little thing.” She swiped the screen like she had seen Cass do earlier. She had no idea what any of the little squares were or what they did. Apps? Is that what Cass called it? They were colorful and plentiful, but Rebecca understood none of it, and that was frustrating. “I wasn’t allowed…”

Cass frowned at the sadness in Rebecca’s voice. She knew Rebecca was thinking about Samantha, and Cass didn’t want tonight marred by memories of that bitch. Fuck, she wanted to run and get Rebecca’s phone just to let her know she had free rein of everything she wanted. Was it the right thing to do? She pushed away from the wall to stand close to Rebecca.

“Wanna see something?” Cass scrolled to her photos app and opened it. Pictures of Rebecca and Cass popped up. She didn’t know if this was the right thing to do, either, but she wanted Rebecca to think of more pleasant things than her time with Samantha.

Rebecca stared at each photo for a long time before going to the next. She looked incredibly happy with Cass. The laughter and light in her eyes was something Rebecca never thought she’d see again. She pushed the phone back to Cass.

“They’re beautiful, Cass.”

“But?”

“It’s overwhelming right now. I’m so sorry.”

“No, don’t be. I shouldn’t have pushed.” Cass slipped her phone in her back pocket.

Rebecca touched Cass’s arm. “You didn’t push; you gave me… something to look forward to. Maybe tomorrow will be a better time to discuss our past. Tonight, I want to just sit with you in the here and now. I know that doesn’t make much sense.”

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