Page 88 of Fragile

I cocked him a look, “I didn’t think there was an us.”

“You know there’s an ‘us’ Leonie. I’ve been inside you, countless times, I don’t think you can say there isn’t an us.” Temper flashed across his face.

“OK, so what do you want to talk about?”

After finishing his sandwich, he wiped his mouth with a napkin and pushed his plate away.

“We need to put the reins on, slow the fuck down.”

Wrinkling my nose, my lips thinned with the surprise of that statement. “I don’t understand. Why? Because you got burgled?” I asked, leaning across the counter. It suddenly felt like someone had sucked all the air from the room.

Gabriel stared up at the ceiling as he chose his next words. As his gaze levelled on me again, he explained in an emotionless tone. “I don’t think my father had anything to do with what happened last night but I do know some dangerous people.” That earlier softness had faded away and his voice was now factual; exactly how you would expect a lawyer to speak in a courtroom. Almost devoid of humanity. Robotic?

Exhaling loudly, I said, “Dangerous? Do I even want to know in what way?” For my dignity, I picked my words carefully. I wasn’t stupid, I knew this was Gabriel back peddling.

“Probably not,” he replied in a bland tone. I was amazed at how fast he could switch his emotions off. One minute he’d been all over me and the next, BOOM. The barrier between us was like a brick wall and due to a break-in? An incident that I was now sure wasn’t just that. I wasn’t being told the whole story.

I closed my eyes and shook my head slowly. Processing the situation and the speed of the about-face. As I re-opened them, I could see he hadn’t moved and was watching me with a hooded gaze. That mask was so firmly in place again.

“We’re moving too fast and we just need to put the brakes on.”

My nose was wrinkled in distaste.

“So, what are you saying? We just ignore it, pretend there isn’t something there?” I adopted a tone of disbelief. Gabriel was the one who had been coming on strong; I had just been swept up in the madness and yet now he was having second thoughts? I felt a sudden pain in my chest.

“Even if we just hold off for a short while. At least until my father is out of the business. He’s sick and so can’t provide the support his main client needs. Once he’s out, it will be easier. I have a feeling that the people he works for may have visited us last night,” Gabriel explained. I found it interesting how he brushed over the bit about his father so quickly.

“It’s for the best Leonie,” he added sadly.

I shrugged my shoulders and pushed my plate away. “The best for who?”

“For you,” he said, grasping my hands in his on the counter.

Misery flooded my gut. “I see. So, do you want me to move out?”

His eyebrows pinched and he scowled. “No. I don’t want that at all.”

My skin fizzed as he rubbed the back of my hand with his thumbs.

“But surely that’s the only way to deal with this. Out of sight out of mind and all that?”

Gabriel looked even more annoyed at the suggestion. Talk about mixed signals. “No, I don’t want you to leave,” his tone was firm.

I tugged my hands away and stood, the stool almost falling over. “No? Gabriel, you’re not making any sense.” Tell him you love him, an inner voice said but I pushed her back down into the darkness. If I were to reveal my true feelings he’d probably back away further.

“But we’re only just getting to know each other, I mean outside of the physical stuff.”

“Believe me, the more you learn about me, the faster you will run in the opposite direction,” Gabriel said with an uncomfortable expression.

I circled the counter and came to stand beside him; we were more on a level with him sitting and he turned on the stool.

I placed my hands on his thighs and he tucked me between his legs. “You’re wrong. I’ve already seen your darker side and it didn’t put me off. Annoyed the heck out of me but I’m still here, aren’t I?”

“You haven’t seen half of it. We’ve known each other, what, a month, two? Trust me when I say you haven’t even scratched the surface.” I moved my cheek against his hand as he cupped my face.

“Why would you want to turn your back on something which could be so amazing? Don’t you at least want to try it and see where it goes?”

Gabriel dropped his hand as if I had burned him. “No, at least not at the minute. I’m not what you need.”

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